15 24 538 https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/2494a22e58edcf68b75ccf7b529ebd39.pdf f41ce46b8190fe33faf7ff4725024919 PDF Text Text Day 123 by windoworks To start us off this morning, this just in from my daughter Zoe. It seems entirely appropriate. Oh yes. Today I’m hoping for a baking banana bread day, although drinking a good gin for breakfast might make the day more fun. �Lately some of my children are worrying that I am depressing myself daily by writing the blog. Chump and the virus they say. Thats all you talk about. And they’re right, but what other news is happening worldwide? My friend Lynne was watching the news with one eye (while she did something else) and all of a sudden she heard a story about China’s crackdown on Hong Kong. Why isn’t that the breaking news of the day? She asked me. That’s a very important story! The reason is (I think), we are consumed by surviving in an unfamiliar world. I sometimes feel as though Craig and I are standing in the eye of the storm, while the tornado whirls around us, with danger everywhere we look. Yesterday someone actually rang our doorbell and stood expectantly at our front door waiting for us to step out and talk to him. The only people who ring our doorbell are the prescription deliverer from our pharmacy (and he waits back in his car for me to open the door and retrieve the meds from the basket by the door before waving and driving off) and Dan the coffee guy, who leaves the bags of beans in the basket, and lastly the Instacart grocery deliverer who rings the bell to let us know the groceries are by the door. We didn’t talk to the salesman, we said no thank you from deep inside the hallway. In a whimsical moment Craig and I decided we live in the Independent Region of Benjamina. We haven’t worked out the details yet but I can tell you the regional boundaries are the property lines. I held a Zoom committee meeting on Friday morning. The faces I am used to seeing across the private dining room table at a local retirement village, were looking at me from somewhere in their houses. We are getting better at using Zoom. There are less awkward silences and more efficient working. In our hearts we know that we will never be able to meet in that private elegant dining room again because the safety of the residents is paramount and negates any outside income. Any hope of resuming face to face program meetings seems to be dwindling off into the distance. I keep wondering if Big Gretch will find it prudent to bring us back down a level. Yesterday there were 62, 653 new cases across the US. In Kent County we had 110 new cases for a total of 5,299 confirmed cases and the deaths are rising. In Michigan there has been an average of 600+ new cases a day. So just because, here’s a mask story: ��Even if this is fake, Ive seen footage of a man in hospital, on oxygen, saying the exact same thing - and pleading with viewers to take it seriously. And I knew I wasn’t alone: It’s bad enough that we’re spending our waking hours worrying about the pandemic. Now, it turns out, many of us are stressing out when we’re asleep. Harvard dream researcher and psychologist Deirdre Barrett found that many people dreamed about catching the coronavirus, spiking a fever and experiencing shortness of breath. One woman had a post-apocalyptic dream where the North Pole was the only place of refuge from the virus. As she trekked around the tundra, she shot a polar bear during an attack I think we are living in a science fiction movie and I’m not sure what the ending might be. I’d like a happy ending, please. And I know some of us are really crazy all the time but during the pandemic, this: Have you heard the COVID-19 conspiracy theory that says the coronavirus was intentionally planned by powerful people? It goes something like this: the pandemic is part of a strategy created by global elites — like Bill Gates and George Soros — to roll out vaccinations with tracking chips that will later be activated by 5G cellular network technology. Holy mark of the beast stuff, Batman! Apparently, a new Pew �Research Center survey says 71 percent of American adults have heard of the theory, and a third of them think it’s "definitely" or "probably" true. Huh? To finish this thread I’ll leave you with this: �Here’s today’s plug for Joe Biden: �And: • It’s 2022, and the coronavirus has at long last been defeated. After a miserable year-and-a-half, alternating between lockdowns and new outbreaks, life can finally begin returning to normal. • But it will not be the old normal. It will be a new world, with a reshaped economy, much as war and depression reordered life for previous generations. • Thousands of stores and companies that were vulnerable before the virus arrived have disappeared. Dozens of colleges are shutting down, in the first wave of closures in the history of American higher education. People have also changed long-held patterns of behavior: Outdoor socializing is in, business trips are out. • Large swaths of the cruise-ship and theme-park industries might go away. So could many movie theaters �and minor-league baseball teams. The long-predicted demise of the traditional department store would finally come to pass. Thousands of restaurants would be wiped out (even if they would eventually be replaced by different restaurants). • The changes imagined in this article are based on neither an unexpectedly fast or slow resolution, but instead on what many scientists consider the baseline. In this scenario, a vaccine will arrive sometime in 2021. Until then, the world will endure waves of sickness, death and uncertainty. Well that’s a bit bleak and probably pretty near the truth. So, to cheer ourselves up its Oliver time. ��Theoretically this is Zoe’s living room but it seems to be Oliver’s playroom to me. Every time we FaceTime with Zoe and Oliver we sing to him at the end of the call. We have a huge repertoire: The Wheels on the Bus and If You’re Happy. When we FaceTimed with Zoe and Oliver 2 nights ago , while we were singing, Zoe said: he’s touching your faces on the screen. Awww. At the edge of mainland Scotland. John O’Groats. From Wikipedia: The settlement takes its name from Jan de Groot, a Dutchman who once plied a ferry from the Scottish mainland to Orkney, which had recently been acquired from Norway by King James IV. Local legend has that the "o' Groats" refers to John's charge of one groat for use of his ferry, but it actually derives from the Dutch de groot, meaning "the large". People from John o' Groats are known as "Groaters". The name John o' Groats has a particular resonance because it is often used as a starting or ending point for cycles, walks and charitable events to and from Land's End (at the extreme south-western tip of the Cornish peninsula in England). The phrase Land's End to John o' Groats is frequently heard both as a literal journey (being the longest possible in Great Britain) and as a metaphor for great or allencompassing distance, similar to the American phrase coast to coast. Also, for many years it was the northern terminal of the A9 trunk road, which now ends at Scrabster. ���I cannot even begin to tell you how cold it was. We left the car and Craig and Asher walked out of earshot to take photos. I returned to our car, freezing cold with icy rain pelting me, to find the car locked and me locked out. I was very cranky by the tine they came back to the car. This was one part of Scotland I didn’t like. On to the Orkneys tomorrow. I found this online: Help us Obi-Wan Kenobi, you’re our only hope. Tomorrow then. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-12_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-123 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-12 Title A name given to the resource Day 123 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/9ac02b0dbc686ad98b85248d295b0502.pdf 77e5035c84d5f3000b7dc204bf058a9c PDF Text Text Day 122 by windoworks This morning the US had 64,630 new coronavirus cases bringing the total to 3.24M cases. My fingers shook as I typed that. In Michigan Governor Whitmer called on Chump to extend the National Guard through to December 31 to help with the virus. Whitmer also signed an executive order requiring mask use in all indoor public spaces (with enforceable fines) and she welcomed a sizable donation of PPE from the Kingdom of Jordan. The Kingdom of Jordan is donating PPE supplies to Michigan? Our governor had to scour the world and ask for essential supplies because there’s nothing coming from the federal government? Should the State of Michigan secede because apparently we’re doing better on our own! Perhaps my blogpost should be renamed Day 1 in the Parallel Universe. The future is unknowable. But the pandemic increasingly looks like one of the defining events of our time. The best-case scenarios are now out of reach, and the United States is suffering through a new virus surge that’s worse than in any other country. One more time for the people in the back: the best case scenarios are now out of reach.There’s a thought that makes you want to get out of bed in the mornings. ��State leaders and laboratories say that they have been confused and feel unprepared by the Trump administration's erratic approach to testing. They report that they don’t know who is in charge, nor do they know which agencies to contact about supply issues. “It is increasingly unlikely the nation will be �prepared with sufficient testing capacity to meet the health and economic needs of the country by late summer or even into the fall,” lawmakers wrote in a report. Email correspondence released through a public records request shows how states that raced to reopen allowed businesses to write their own rules when it happened. The emails also show governors' thinking as they have pledged not to shut back down, even as cases spike in states such as Georgia, Florida and South Carolina. Health experts in these states say that concerns from industries overpowered the health advice they were giving to implement more presentation measures. And this: Fifty-seven former government scientists and public health officials have demanded the Trump administration stop politicizing the pandemic. “Sidelining science has already cost lives, imperiled the safety of our loved ones, compromised our ability to safely reopen our businesses, schools, and places of worship, and endangered the health of our democracy itself,” wrote the former officials, who served under presidents Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Trump. Bu this is expecting sense from a man who has no common sense, empathy or moral fiber. This is a cartoon but its not too far from the truth: �Here’s a story. Some years ago Craig and I were on a cruise (Craig was one of the lecturers) and the other lecturers were from the New York Times. During a session, one of the NYT lecturers was talking about Sean Spicer who he knew quite well through press circles. When Sean was asked to become press secretary for chump, he asked this lecturer if he should take the job or not. The lecturer said he was torn: on the one hand he’d have an inside man in the White House and on the other hand, he predicted this move would be the end of Spicer’s career. I think he probably said: think carefully. But to illustrate this, I found this gem 3 days ago: As one anonymous former official told our White House correspondent Peter Nicholas: “You get the Trump stink on you, it’s hard to get it off.” �In the dire warning category: Health experts are increasingly convinced that the only way to stop America's rapidly worsening coronavirus situation is to reimpose stay-at-home orders, effectively abandoning the country's twomonth-long effort to resurrect public life. “Stay-at-home is a blunt instrument,” Farshad Fani Marvasti, director of public health at the University of Arizona College of Medicine at Phoenix, told The Post. “But when you’re leading the world in new cases and things don’t seem to be getting better, you may have to use that blunt instrument.” Or as Harvard surgeon Thomas Tsai vividly put it: “We see the hurricane coming. In some places, it’s already here. The question is whether you’re going to evacuate your citizens from the path.” The White House shows no sign of heeding this advice, and is instead pressuring federal health agencies to fall in line with President Trump's rosy outlook on the pandemic. This morning I have looked for good news to counter the overwhelming bad news - and I couldn’t find any. Sometimes its just beginning a gratitude list. Here’s my first item: I am grateful for my husband Craig who is sharing this pandemic with me every day; who takes me for long drives in the country until the green lowers my anxiety levels; who carries out all the projects I have devised for him; who wraps his arms around me and holds me until I run out of tears; and so much more. I am so fortunate to have this fellow traveler in my life. Just because: �And: �And its a 2 photo Oliver day. ��Creative play day at Daycare - and apparently he had to have his hair shampooed before bed because he had glitter all through it. And where’s his little apron?? ��Just chatting up a girl at daycare. Flashback: I loved Fort William. It reminded me of parts of the South Island of New Zealand. But, we had to move on and on our way north we visited Loch Ness. This is a deep freshwater loch 23 miles long. It is best known for its alleged sightings of the Loch Ness Monster, also known as Nessie. It is often described as large, long-necked, and with one or more humps protruding from the water. Popular interest and belief in the creature have varied since it was brought to worldwide attention in 1933. Evidence of its existence is anecdotal, with a number of disputed photographs and sonar readings. Scientists state that it has no biological basis and sightings are hoaxes or wishful thinking. But our main interest at Loch Ness was Urquhart Castle. It’s ruins date from the 13th century to the 16th century. The castle, situated on a headland overlooking Loch Ness, is one of the largest in Scotland in area.It was approached from the west and defended by a ditch and drawbridge. The buildings of the castle were laid out around two main enclosures on the shore. The northern enclosure or Nether Bailey includes most of the more intact structures, including the gatehouse, and the five-story Grant Tower at the north end of the castle. The southern enclosure or Upper Bailey, sited on higher ground, comprises the scant remains of earlier buildings. (Authors note: yes, I used Wikipedia) Now I could research who lived there and what significant events happened - but I’m going to suggest you do that for yourself. ������After Loch Ness we drove north to John O’Groats. That’s tomorrow. In Victoria Australia, where new cases continue to surge daily, my son is on Day 3 of the 6 week total lockdown. The police have been busy. They’ve arrested and fined 20 people at an illegal birthday gathering (moral of story - don’t buy 20 KFC meals at one time) and they’ve arrested a couple who tried twice to drive to their holiday cottage. Now I know this sounds draconian but it gets the job done - and this is what a real shutdown looks like. Remember: you HAVE to wear a mask in public spaces; you SHOULD stand 6 feet OR MORE apart even outside and you MUST keep washing your hands (20 seconds counted properly). We are knee deep in the first wave and we can’t seem to get back to dry land. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-11_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-122 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-11 Title A name given to the resource Day 122 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/bafca08ba0603be797de8bc8328c4277.pdf 11855213708aaf5dea751901a0da0d00 PDF Text Text Day 121 by windoworks Welcome to the state of high anxiety. Yesterday I had a video call with my doctor and she told me that so many of her patients were experiencing high anxiety and some are experiencing depression. Some of her patients have never experienced anxiety or depression before and they are finding it extremely difficult to deal with. She checked that I was seeing a counselor and was very happy when I said yes. My counselor and I had been discussing changing from weekly to every other week, but my doctor said no. Keep it weekly, even if you just check in each week. So I am sharing this with you because the days of ‘how are you?’ ‘Fine’ are far behind us. Polite, meaningless exchanges are like normal life, a thing of the past. If you ask me how I am, I will tell you and I am always interested to hear how you are really doing. The phrase ‘high anxiety’ triggered a memory and after quick research I found this: High Anxiety PG 1977 ‧ Comedy/Mystery ‧ 1h 35m Just after becoming the director of the Psychoneurotic Institute for the Very, Very Nervous, Dr. Richard H. Thorndyke (Mel Brooks) is greeted by a series of mysterious events. When his colleagues -- including the militaristic and mustachioed Nurse Diesel (Cloris Leachman) -- become leery of his questions, they accuse him of murder. Thorndyke's own mental health comes into question as he struggles to clear his name in the midst of a crippling bout of a condition known as "high anxiety." It is available on Starz and I think Craig and I are going to watch it tonight. I love a good Mel Brooks movie. Late yesterday afternoon a huge rainstorm blew in. Craig and Murphy sat on the front porch and enjoyed watching it. This morning its cool enough to turn off the a/c and have all the doors and windows open instead. ��What about schools reopening? �Guidance from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention calls for social distancing, and grouping kids into small pods, to limit the spread of a potential infection. That means a drastic reduction in class sizes everywhere. In the absence of funds for more space and more staff, that's driving schools to cut back on in-person class time. The state of California, for example, recommends splitting up students into smaller cohorts that attend two days a week, every other week, or mornings and afternoons, while offering remote instruction the rest of the time. We're hearing versions of this limited-time plan everywhere from New York City — the nation's largest school district — to Omaha, Neb., Seattle and West Bloomfield, Mich. At the same time, districts are surveying parents and teachers to find out if they are willing to go back at all. One national survey by the American Federation of Teachers found about 1 in 4 educators were not willing to come back even with precautions, and a survey of parents found two-thirds were nervous about the prospect. That means many districts are offering remote learning at the same time, which is essentially a whole other job for schools and teachers. �In Victoria, Australia, the State Medical Officer is suggesting the wearing of masks is a good idea. Asher tells me that he has a colleague’s mother who is making them ( ahh, mask makers of the world, unite!) and he will get a couple from her. I would send some to him but the mail from the US is incredibly slow. In other news from New Zealand and Australia, both countries have temporarily halted incoming international flights as quarantine facilities are overloaded. In New Zealand they’re considering using cruise ships as quarantine spaces. Meanwhile more cruise lines are talking about ship scrapping and airlines are warning of bankruptcies while laying off thousands of crew members. Oh and here’s a story that will raise the hairs on the back of your neck: almost 1 in 3 Pakistani pilots have fake pilot licenses that is, someone else took their pilot test for them. Say, what? �And after a whistleblower told the story - Union leaders representing aviation workers, with the backing of Democrats in Congress, have clashed with airlines and the Trump administration over safety at airports and onboard planes. With only limited direction from the federal government, airlines and airports have been adopting their own approaches, leading to a patchwork of a different approaches. While the government has declined to impose new rules on the industry, it last week issued guidelines that recommend limiting the number of passengers on flights and changes to check-in procedures to encourage social distancing As Craig says - not getting on an airplane any time soon. Last 3 Dr Fauci questions: If you had young kids, would you send them back to school in the fall? It really depends on where you live. Have you been tested for the coronavirus? Yes, every time I go to the White House. What is your best guess about when a vaccine will be available? We have multiple candidates, and my hope is that we will have more than one, probably by the end of this year or the beginning of 2021. Notice he said: my hope. Craig heard this morning on the radio that even if there is a vaccine, it would take at least 12 months to disseminate it. With tears in his eyes, the director of the World Health Organization pleaded Thursday for international unity to fight the pandemic, after President Trump announced his intention to quit the organization. “How difficult is it for humans to unite to fight a common enemy that’s killing people indiscriminately?” Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus asked. “Can’t we understand that the divisions or the cracks between us actually are to the advantage of the virus?” And: Coronavirus patients are pouring into hospitals in hot spots such as Florida, Arizona, California and Texas, where hospitals are adding new ICU beds and specialairflow systems as virus hospitalizations set records almost daily. The surge in patients is creating a major shortage in protective equipment, and forcing healthcare workers to reuse the PPE they already have. Nurses say they are using N95 masks for weeks at a time. “A lot people thought once the alarm was sounded back in March, surely the federal government would fix this, but that hasn’t happened,” said Deborah Burger, a California nurse and president of National Nurses United. �And today’s Joe post: �How refreshing As the disease spreads, Americans are recalibrating their expectations about the future. In the late June survey, 74 percent said they now expect disruption of their lives due to the disease to last until the end of this year or longer. That group is split evenly between those who expect things to return closer to normal by year’s end and those who say it will be at least sometime in 2021 before that happens. And actually, I think that expectation may have changed again in the last week, and not for the better. �And �And this �It’s time for Oliver. ��The top one - what about reading to me? And the bottom photo: at last I have you reading to just me. �Flashback: while Craig and Asher were climbing Ben Nevis, I went for a lake cruise on Loch Linnhe. It was freezing waiting at the dock, never mind on the boat - but it was worth it. �����Loch Linnhe is a sea loch. It’s about 30 miles long and it opens into the Firth of Lorne at its southwestern end. We cruised for about 2 hours and the captain told us more information that I could retain. In the top photo its the lake from the shore; then 2 farm photos. They built longer cottages so their animals could be housed in one end of the cottage in the winter. The animals provided some heat for their owners. Along the shores the farms were mainly sheep. Next photo is of a salmon farm. At the very end of the loch there was a seal colony but it was too hard to get a photo. And the last photo is of us returning back to Fort William. Further north tomorrow. I’ll leave you with this: ��� Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-10_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-121 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-10 Title A name given to the resource Day 121 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/064b34a3f4d4ac09130568821d5d4968.pdf 425ba7408a88eb03df07e11d0d845f3f PDF Text Text Day 120 – or the beginning of week 17. by windoworks One of the best signs I’ve seen so far. This morning is tough. It’s so hot outside, our water heater is on the fritz so no hot water, and in really disturbing news, Grand Rapids has been designated a ‘high risk’ area. We have 5,014 cases - a rise of 71 new cases since yesterday. Michigan has 67,237 cases - a rise of 610 cases since yesterday. The US added 62,751 new cases yesterday . That’s a terrifying number for one day. Other countries have taken it seriously, and we have not,” said Ashish Jha, director of the Global Health Institute at Harvard University. “Other [countries] have had a very aggressive shutdown. We have not. Other countries have taken an aggressive approach to testing and tracing and isolation. We have not. Some countries have universal masking laws, and we don’t.” Just to remind you: the fish rots from the head. �"We're very much going to put pressure on governors and everybody else to open the schools," Trump said during a roundtable discussion Tuesday afternoon at the White House. "Get open in the fall. We want your schools open," Trump said. The president spoke alongside first lady Melania Trump, administration officials and teachers as part of planned programming from the White House to push for the reopening of schools. This was a meeting in a closed space, with recycled air conditioning. People are sitting next to each other or standing around the walls. I counted 3 masks in the photograph. Chump has ordered schools to open and that’s all he’s offered, an order. So this is the real story of where we are: Anthony S. Fauci’s statement Tuesday that the United States is “still knee deep in the first wave” of the coronavirus pandemic is certainly true in a metaphorical sense. The director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases meant that the country has not yet effectively tamped down the initial round of infections, months after the virus emerged. Where the metaphor really shines, though, is in a more literal sense. We analyzed county-level data through Monday to determine when each county hit its recorded high in the seven-day average of new �coronavirus cases. More than a fifth of the country’s population now lives in a county where the high was reached on Monday. If it’s a tide threatening the body politic, it’s at our knees. Again, that’s the other significant part of what Fauci said. Not only are we knee-deep, we’re knee-deep in the virus’s first emergence. We never left the water. I was talking to my oldest child the other day. He is an editorjournalist for an online news service in New Zealand. In his job he sees many disturbing things. I hadn’t realized that those people sorting out what news we should see on tv, or streaming, on our TVs, or computers, or phones is vetted before we see it. That is, someone has to watch the raw footage (and sometimes that means the carnage) and decide what is appropriate to show the viewing public. Consider this: when it warns you that some scenes may be disturbing to viewers, think about what they left out and what toll that takes on editors. And yet, my son remains a kind, gentle man who always tries to cheer me up and show me the lighter side of life. This morning I offer this gem from him: Japan has banned screaming at its reopened amusement parks as a measure to stop the potential spread of Covid. They released a video of two stony-faced executives going on a roller coaster ride and remaining stoically silent. And I found another video of a Dutch rollercoaster with a teddy bear in every seat as it raced around the course but I couldn’t share it with you - I’m sure you can find it online. 3 more Dr Fauci questions: �What about mammograms? Would you get a routine mammogram/advise your wife/daughter to get one? If routine, I’d probably tell her to wait. Are you working in your office? What precautions do you take? I don’t wear a mask when I’m alone in my office, but I slap one on if I walk out into the hall and could pass someone, like my assistant, who also wears one. Will you ever shake hands again? Hug/kiss someone? I think it’s going to be a while. The infection rate will have to be extremely low or nonexistent, or we have to have a vaccine. Right now, I don’t even think about doing it. Last 3 questions tomorrow. This is one way to social distance in a park. And here is a sign at one of our local restaurants. ��I would like to say that everyone in our city is wearing a mask but not only are some people not doing so, they are maskless and belligerent. It seems some people go into stores seeking a mask confrontation. Like our idiot ‘leader’, its all about me, me, me. To change pace, Craig has finished painting the back of the house. In the last day or so I have noticed people driving down our street and stopping in front of our house and our neighbors house. I guess the Big Blue next to the Big Red is striking. Oh look! Murphy made it into the photo! Today Craig is exhausted. It was dreadful painting in the heat yesterday. It was dreadful just being in the heat. Oliver! �Look at those red cheeks. That 6th tooth is slow in breaking through. �Fort William. The main reason for staying here two nights was so Craig and Asher could climb Ben Nevis. This is the highest mountain in the United Kingdom and the summit is 4,413 ft above sea level. They drove to the Rangers Center where they had to sign the book. The woman staffing the counter cheerfully informed them that at least 2 people had fallen off the mountain in the last 2 weeks. She told them to be careful at the top as the track runs between sheer drops on either side. Look for the markers, she said. I didn’t know any of this until afterwards. �����As you can see, the first hour or so of the climb was in cold but clear weather. When they neared the summit, a thick cloud cover rolled in and they had to proceed carefully between the track markers to safely reach the top. It didn’t look like easy climbing to me on all those stones. Tomorrow I’ll show you what I did while they were on Ben Nevis. Practicing Safe Six? And remember: masking for a friend. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-09_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-120 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-09 Title A name given to the resource Day 120 - or the beginning of week 17 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/710267d5b6b4022dcfa2523aca877bd1.pdf 058fd4ec08b70df5a5437af2af129e3e PDF Text Text Day 119 by windoworks This morning Craig said: do you know what day it is? When I answered Wednesday July 8, he said: good job Pamela! It’s true that each day looks pretty much like the day before and I assume that today looks almost exactly like tomorrow. The big questions of the day are ones like: will it rain today? Did I order enough bread? What can we eat for dinner? Will there be fireflies again tonight? Earth shattering, I know. 119 days means 119 breakfasts, lunches and dinners. In 119 days we’ve had one take out lunch and one take out dinner. I’ve baked bread, rolls, muffins, cakes, pies and bars. We’ve harvested one crop of lettuce and the second one is on its way. We’ve done many home improvements - and when I say we, I mean I made the suggestion and Craig carried it out. I think we have explored every inch of Grand Rapids and most of Kent County by car, and we’ve found a lot of parks to walk in. And that’s our lives, one day after another. People keep asking and asking: when will it be over? When will my life be normal again? Here’s one answer (and I suspect, a fairly accurate one): Taken together, the studies bolster a view increasingly voiced by experts: there may never be a “return to normal.” Rather, the ill effects of the pandemic will resonate long after an effective coronavirus treatment is discovered. And just when you thought that hand washing, distancing and masks were enough, there’s this: Scientists are urging the WHO to take the possibility of airborne spread of the virus more seriously. “In a forthcoming paper titled ‘It is Time to Address Airborne Transmission of Covid-19,’ 239 signatories attempt to raise awareness about what they say is growing evidence that the virus can spread indoors through aerosols that linger in the air and can be infectious even in smaller quantities than previously thought. Until recently, most public health guidelines have focused on social distancing measures, regular hand-washing and precautions to avoid droplets. But the signatories to the paper say the potential of the virus to spread via airborne transmission has not been fully appreciated even by public health institutions such as the WHO. … Last night I watched a video of Chris Cuomo on CNN interview Keisha Lance Bottoms, the Mayor of Atlanta, Georgia. Two days ago she tested positive for Covid-19 with NO symptoms. Her husband tested positive and 2 of her 4 children have been tested and the other 2 will be tested. She told Chris that she did everything correctly and carefully and she has no idea how she contracted the virus. So maybe this lingering aerosols is a real thing. �Chump’s niece is releasing a ‘tell all’ book about her uncle and so far she hasn’t told us anything we didn’t know. She blames his persona on his father, but honestly, I have no interest or time to waste pitying him. Every day he sinks to unbelievable depths. For a long time I thought he would hit the bottom but apparently he epitomizes ‘a bottomless pit.’ Craig says historians will judge him harshly but I don’t care. I want him to be judged harshly right now. And Gladysin - here’s the right moment for this: Oh yes. And I found this somewhere and I just have to include it today: Trump should’ve started his speech with: Four whores and 7 lawyers ago. �We are banned from Europe, probably Australia, definitely New Zealand (no international flights allowed in for the next 2 weeks), possibly Canada and now, some parts of Mexico: The residents of the Mexican beach town of Puerto Peñasco used their cars to block all southbound traffic from Arizona as the town’s mayor asked American tourists not to visit Mexico. 3 more Dr Fauci questions: What would you tell your kids or grandkids who wanted to join a protest march or go to a political rally? My daughters feel very strongly about social injustice, but would not likely want to do that. They are very careful with their health. They stay away from crowds. Would you go work out at a gym? Swim in a pool? Run? Walk? I wouldn’t go to a gym. I need to be so careful. I don’t want to take a chance. I have a pool at home, so I swim in that. I do power-walking with Chris. I was running until about a year ago, but every time I went running, my back would tighten up the next morning. So now I walk the same distance. It just takes longer. We go every day with few exceptions, 3.5 miles per day during the week, four miles over the weekend. Prior to covid-19, I did it at lunch alone in the parks near NIH. Now, I do it in the evening with Chris around the neighborhood. On the weekends, Chris and I do it together on the C&O canal. Are you making routine trips to the doctor or dentist? No, not yet, although I might check in within the next few weeks with my physician to get some soothing meds for my throat since I have a hoarse voice from so many briefings and interviews. He will probably take a look and say: “Just stop talking so much.” As if this virus isn’t life changing enough, here’s a warning from the United Nations. Lets be prepared next time, okay? • A new United Nations report warns that more diseases that pass from animals to humans, such as COVID-19, are likely to emerge as habitats are ravaged by wildlife exploitation, unsustainable farming practices and climate change. • These pathogens, known as zoonotic diseases, also include Ebola, MERS, HIV/AIDS and West Nile virus. They have increasingly emerged due to stresses humans have placed on animal habitats, according to the U.N. Environment Program report • We have intensified agriculture, expanded infrastructure and extracted resources at the expense of our wild spaces," UNEP Executive Director Inger Andersen said. "The science is clear that if we keep exploiting wildlife and destroying our ecosystems, then we can expect to see a steady stream of these diseases jumping from animals to humans in the years ahead." On that cheery note, I offer these: �The wildflowers at the Grand Ravine Park. We drove to look at the river but it was just too hot to walk. �The lushness of the community garden - you’re looking at one third of it. And I think it is a Two Oliver Photo day: �His new favorite book which we watched him read last night. As he turns the pages he says: oh! ��He has turned into a speed crawler and he goes into Mummy’s bedroom and plays with the bottles on the table beside her bed. She always knows when he’s in there because the pill bottle rattles. Is that a guilty look? Flashback: the next day we arrived In Fort William. This town is located in the Highlands on the shores of Loch Linnhe. Fort William is a major tourist centre, with Glen Coe just to the south and Ben Nevis to the east. It is a centre for hillwalking and climbing due to its proximity to Ben Nevis and many other mountains. It is also known recently for its connection to Diana Gabaldon and her Outlander novels. Fort William features heavily in the early books. ���Our first real glimpse of the Highlands and then Loch Linnhe. More Fort William adventures tomorrow. I’ll leave you with these 2 thoughts: �And, �� Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-08_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-119 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-08 Title A name given to the resource Day 119 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/78133311032005b606d6960b0d9870dd.pdf 2b2ef0c8ed76b5a557e326026ac6efc6 PDF Text Text Day 118 by windoworks Last night two significant things happened. First, we watched the second half of “Hamilton“. I was never enthusiastic about paying a small fortune to see it onstage, especially as it is sometimes hard for me to distinguish the lyrics in a live show. We watched it over 2 nights and thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. It allowed us to see the men behind the birth of the country as real, flawed, people who all put their pants on, one leg at a time, just like us. The second thing was that as we were about to turn out the light and go to sleep, a firefly flew around our bedroom and out through the door. How did it get inside the house? This morning there is no sign of it. So, in Victoria, Australia, they have returned the state to Level 3: outdoor exercise and recreation is limited to you and members of your household or you plus one other person if you do not live with them. Hair and nail salons, cultural and entertainment venues, community facilities are closed. Cafes and restaurants are returned to take out and delivery only. There are only 4 reasons to leave home: food shopping; medical care; exercise and study and work (if you can’t do it from home). This level will stay in place until August 19. This applies to our youngest son Asher. He’s right back inside again, keeping safe. Yesterday the US had 57,186 new cases. Meanwhile, in the alternative Republican universe: The Food and Drug Administration Commissioner Stephen Hahn said it was “too early to tell” whether the Republican National Convention could be held safely in Jacksonville, Fla., next month. “We’ll have to see how this unfolds in Florida and elsewhere around the country,” he told CNN. ‘We’re right back where we were at the peak of the epidemic during the New York outbreak,’ former FDA commissioner Scott Gottlieb said on ‘Face the Nation’ on CBS. ‘The difference now is that we really had one epicenter of spread when New York was going through its hardship, now we really have four major epicenters of spread: Los Angeles, cities in Texas, cities in Florida, and Arizona. And Florida looks to be in the worst shape.’ New coronavirus cases in that state on Sunday exceeded 10,000 in a day for the third time in the past week, after the state posted a record of 11,458 the previous day. The new infections pushed the state’s total caseload past 200,000, a mark passed by just two other states, New York and California. Oh really? How did this happen? This is a line to be tested in Dallas, Texas. This is just part of one line for one testing station. �My friend Mary Alice (Authors note: MA and I share a birthday. She is the only other non family member I’ve met who’s shares a birthday with me) sent me this artist’s name; Pamela Sztybel, who publishes a drawing most days on FaceBook. Here is an offering from a week ago. This one’s for all of my Australian fam. �And this should scare you: After 28 straight days of rising infection averages, with no solution in sight, President Trump's political strategists are betting that Americans will simply get used to an uncontrolled pandemic before he stands for reelection in November, our politics desk reported Monday. They’re of the belief that people will get over it or if we stop highlighting it, the base will move on and the public will learn to accept 50,000 to 100,000 new cases a day,” said a former administration official in touch with the campaign. I have no words. When you fill in your absentee voting form, or stand in line on November 3, remember these words: the public will learn to accept 50,000 to 100,000 new cases a day. We’ll simply get used to an uncontrolled pandemic. I had to pause for a moment there. I think I may have slipped into an alternative universe and I can’t seem to find my way back. Next 3 answers from Dr Fauci: �Are you getting your hair cut? I usually get it cut every five weeks, but I didn’t go for a long while. By the 11th week, it was looking really bad. So I asked the woman who cuts my hair if I could come in really early in the morning, at 7 a.m., and we arranged to do that. No one else was there. She wore a mask and I wore a mask. Are you willing to fly? What about bus, train, subway? I’m 79 years old. I am not getting on a plane. I have been on flights where I’ve been seated near people who were sneezing and coughing, and then three days later, I’ve got it. So, no chance. No Metro, no public transportation. I’m in a high risk group, and I don’t want to play around. Would you visit your kids/grandkids? My middle daughter, who teaches school in New Orleans, drove up here after they closed the schools. She could teach online from here, so she thought: Why not come home and see her parents? When she got here she went straight through the back entrance into the basement. She stayed in our basement, which has a room with a bed, a shower, electricity, and she did not come upstairs for 14 days. My wife brought food down to her on paper dishes. She lives in a very high risk city, and she wouldn’t let us near her. I wanted to hug her when she arrived, but she said: “No way, dad.” She came upstairs after 14 days, and then stayed with us for several months. I too had my haircut early in the morning, wearing a mask, with no one else there. I’m not getting into any other form of transportation except our car and I would visit my children in a heartbeat and do the mandatory quarantine but the Australian and New Zealand borders are closed, as well as the NSW/Victoria border - and anyway, our American passports expire in less than 6 months and it will take months to get them renewed. This: �And this: �A picture is worth a thousand words. Oh by the way, Harvard University will be teaching all classes online this fall. Oliver! Because he makes me smile. ���Flashback: on to Loch Lomond. 'Lake of the Elms' is a freshwater Scottish loch which crosses the Highland Boundary Fault, often considered the boundary between the lowlands of Central Scotland and the Highlands. The Loch forms part of the Loch Lomond and The Trossachs National Park which was established in 2002. This was the start of our journey into the Scottish Highlands which I just loved. �����These are all photographs of Loch Lomond. In the bottom photo I am standing in the parking lot next to a cafe/restaurant where I ate the best Caesar salad of my life. The falls are the Falls of Fallach, and the second to last photo is of Loos Bay. I decided to time myself this morning - so far I’ve been writing and researching for 90 minutes. It will be another 15 minutes to finish, edit and publish. I research on and off all day long. It’s almost like a real job! I really appreciate hearing from you and anything you can share with me for addition to the blog. Sometimes I wait for the appropriate moment to share something you’ve sent me (Gladysin). This morning my friend Mary Alice posted on FaceBook an a capella song with the words from a Mayan greeting. You are another me. I am another you. Isn’t this the best place to begin? � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-07_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-118 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-07 Title A name given to the resource Day 118 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/1687310616bf454e78c2523cd6fdfad2.pdf a98eef9a2ef86a3f261db396b2059138 PDF Text Text Day 117 by windoworks In 4 more days I will have been writing this Pandemic Diary for one third of the year. Sobering thought. Now before I begin today’s post, I have to correct an item in yesterday’s post. The monument I was standing awkwardly in front of in Edinburgh was not the Robert Burns Monument but the Walter Scott Monument. He was a Scottish historical novelist, poet, playwright, and historian. Many of his works remain classics of both English-language literature and of Scottish literature. Famous titles include the Lady of the Lake (narrative poem) and novels Rob Roy and Ivanhoe. (Many thanks for the catch, Jan). As ever, where to begin? Perhaps this from my friend Heathe: Thomas Jefferson: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all white, heterosexual, educated, firstborn, Christian men who own property and have a record of military service are created equal, that they..." Founding Fathers: "Wait, hold up." Thomas Jefferson: "Yes?" Founding Fathers: "Something about that last sentence... It's a little wordy. What if you just said 'men' and left out all the adjectives?" Thomas Jefferson: "You know, the thought crossed my mind. But then I got to thinking, what if future generations misinterpreted our intentions? What if there was confusion about how we felt about women, minorities, atheists, poor people, those that do not have access to a quality education, homosexuals, other faiths, homeless people, etc... I decided to leave all the adjectives in so there would be no way future generations could misunderstand our interpretation of 'equality'." Founding Fathers: "Tom.... you don't think future Americans would be that stupid do you? As you yourself said, it is 'self-evident' that all white, heterosexual, educated, first-born, Christian men who own property and have a record of military service are created equal. I think it's safe to say future generations will understand exactly what we mean if you just shortened that to 'men' and left it at that." Thomas Jefferson: "Hhhmmm... Well, alright. I'll edit it. I sure hope wars don't get fought over this..." �Meanwhile in Victoria Australia, last night the New South Wales state government closed the borders between themselves and Victoria. Of course this is personal to Craig and I as our youngest son, Asher, lives and works in Melbourne. On the other hand, this is how you stop community spread across state lines. Then this from New Zealand: In an effort to further prevent the spread of COVID-19, Air New Zealand is making a clear separation between its domestic and international crews. While there was already a split for long-haul flights out of Oceania, the latest change further divides crews, taking into consideration trans-Tasman trips. I wonder if United and other airlines here that fly internationally have considered this? And speaking of travel, yesterday I read that major cruise lines have begun scrapping some ships - that is, breaking them down for parts. Most cruise companies have delayed any future sailings to either September, October or November. Next 3 questions for Dr Fauci: 4. Would you dine inside a restaurant? Outside? Do you get takeout. We don’t do anything inside. I don’t eat in restaurants. We do get takeout. 5. Do you take any precautions with your mail or packages? I used to, but now I just bring the mail in, wash my hands, then let it lie around for a day or two before I open it. 6. Do you go to friends' homes for dinner, or have friends to your house, or see them in other ways? On the rare occasion when we have people over, we have them out on the deck, six feet apart, and we never have more than two people, and they are people who themselves are locked in. We wear masks, unless we �are eating. We don’t share anything. There are no common bowls. Each person has his or her own receptacle. Some people even bring their own glasses. We always do takeout and I tell the takeout people that I want the food in four separate plastic containers, so no one has to touch anyone else’s food. Everyone’s food is self-contained. Also, we always stay outside. We don’t do anything inside. If it’s too hot, or rainy, we cancel it. 3 more questions tomorrow. In case you were wondering The Republican Party under Donald Trump has become a party wandering aimlessly in the street talking to itself and responding to itself, and all the rest of us have become the pedestrians trying to avoid that guy. John Kasich: They coddled this guy the whole time and now it’s like some rats are jumping off of the sinking ship. It’s just a little late, It’s left this nation with a crescendo of hate not only between politicians but between citizens. … It started with Charlottesville and people remained silent then, and we find ourselves in this position now. I’m glad to see some of these Republicans moving the other way but it reminds me of Vichy France where they said, ‘Well, I never had anything to do with that,’” a reference to the French government that continued during Nazi occupation in the 1940s. Something to divert us: This is Pony Gate, Lincoln, Mass. It started out with a few “horses” grazing in a field and people keep dropping them off. Under the cover of night, they are often re-arranged. No one takes credit for it which makes it funnier! �One for the teachers and then this: ��Sometimes we think that something like this has never happened before but here is this from the Spanish flu epidemic. The 1918-1920 flu pandemic came in three major waves. After the first wave in the US, the virus subsided, and Americans were restless to have businesses reopened and for social life to resume. There was a growing movement to stop wearing masks, which had become ubiquitous - so much so that The AntiMask League of 1919 was formed. These were protests from those who thought the public health ordinance violated their liberty. The virus came back with a vengeance in the fall and was much deadlier than the first wave, eventually killing more than 675,000 Americans and killing around 100 million of the 500 million it infected worldwide before it was over. This was before mass vaccination, before the electron microscope; this is the tragedy of herd immunity and stubborn ignorance. ��Notice that the woman on the right has a sign which says: wear a mask or go to jail. Hmmm. It must be time for an Oliver moment. ��So young and yet so bossy - not now Alfie! Still in Edinburgh. ���Today we visited the National Museum of Scotland. It is full of artifacts and has an excellent cafe where we met a friend of Asher’s with her family for lunch. From the top: on our way to the museum we came across the cafe where apparently, J.K Rowling sat and wrote much of the Harry Potter books entirely by hand. over cake and coffee. It has now become a major tourist attraction. I have never read the books (although I’ve tried) but I have seen all the films. Next: the atrium in the Museum. Asher and I are sitting on a bench waiting for his friend. And lastly, Dolly the cloned sheep. Dolly was a female domestic sheep born in 1996 and was the first mammal cloned from an adult somatic cell, using nuclear transfer. After Dolly, many other mammals were cloned including pigs, deer, horses and bulls. The main result from cloning is the development of stem cell research. Now they use Crispr for gene editing. I once stood on the spot where you can ask the researchers questions behind the glass window in the lab in the Chicago Museum of Natural History, and asked: Are they cloning humans anywhere in the world? After a silence in which the 3 of them looked at each other, one finally said: well, we aren’t. Tomorrow we begin our journey further north. �“Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up”. Anne Lamott Carry on. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-06_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-117 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-06 Title A name given to the resource Day 117 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/496c7851d35db4bec16bed54dc7b848b.pdf ef622169aa5cbbaf69dd0f5a1c61471b PDF Text Text Day 116 – the day after July 4th by windoworks Last night Craig and I sat on our front porch for 30 minutes as the fireworks exploded constantly, all around us. The noise was incredible. Some made a whistling sound and then burst into huge exploding balls of color. And some made such a bang as they shot up that I could feel the porch floor vibrate under my bare feet - and then they exploded as a small round ball. All noise and no color. The last fireworks exploded at 3:30am. Until that time the noise was loud, constant and endless. There was barely a second between explosions. I’m sure everyone loved the display - but 3:30 in the morning? As I told you yesterday, we didn’t go to the Hollyhock Parade but our neighbors 3 doors down joined the parade in their beautifully restored truck - and everyone wore face masks! Here they are ready to go. ��My next door neighbors cycled over to watch but said it was nothing like the normal parade. Maybe next year. From Joe Biden: Our country was founded on an idea. “We hold these truths to be self-evident. That all men are created equal.“ We never lived up to it. Jefferson himself didn’t. He held slaves. Women were excluded. Two suggestions = perhaps it would be a more honest document if it said; That all rich white men are created equal. And it should say: That all people are created equal. And here’s something else for your consideration: Notice anything different? Yes, that’s right, its upside down. Why? The United States Code, the list of federal statutes, says the stars and stripes should only be flown upside down to signal “dire distress in instances of extreme danger to life or property.” It is also commonly acknowledged that the American flag is flown upside down as a form of political protest. �And I think we actually have both reasons at this time. Now to make you laugh. Our Governor, Gretchen Whitmer, affectionately known as Big Gretch posted a photo of herself wearing this: �To interpret for all overseas readers; Dear America, sorry about Betsy De Vos (possibly the worst Secretary of Education, a billionaire from the Amway family, AND from Grand Rapids). Sincerely, Michigan. A constant embarrassment to us in Grand Rapids - but thats another whole blog thread. Dr Fauci was interviewed about how he manages his life in the pandemic. There were other scientists interviewed but I am presenting his answers only, as we all know who he is. There were many questions so I will post them over several days. First 3 questions: 1.When and where do you wear a mask? Anthony S. Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases: It dominates everything I do. The only time I don’t wear one is when I am alone, when I am home with my wife, or when I am speaking in public — provided there is 6 feet between me and the people to whom I am speaking, as was the case when I answered questions at the recent Congressional hearings. 2. Besides family, do you allow anyone else inside your home, such as cleaners or service people for repairs? The only person who comes into the house besides (my wife) Christine and me is the woman who cleans the house once every two weeks. She wears a mask and gloves at all times while in the house. �3. Do you shop in grocery stores, or order online? Do you wash the items off or disinfect the outside of packages once you get home? I do physically go to the grocery store, but I wear a mask and keep my distance. I usually go at odd times. I spend half the day alone in my office, and I’m part-time at the White House. In the late afternoon or evening, when I’m finished with the White House, I go shopping for groceries, or to drugstores. I don’t disinfect the bags. In general, I will take the materials out of the bags, then wash my hands with soap and water, and then use Purell, and let everything sit for a day. I am not advocating his response as the only way to live at this time but it is interesting to read the responses of the leading scientist in this pandemic. More tomorrow. Step-kick your way to the couch for the Disney+ edition of the musical Hamilton. To say that much has changed in the country since the hit first opened in 2015 would be an understatement. “Hamilton’s brassy celebration of the founding of America’s governmental institutions plays in a different light in 2020,” our film critic David Sims writes. “But the show is not irrelevant … It now also functions as a reminder that the country’s history and future is still being written and rewritten.” We haven’t watched it yet, but I excited to have the opportunity, as I never did get to see the show live. My son alerted me to an interesting program that originated in Japan with Akira Miyawaki, a botanist. Now you have to look this up online for yourself, but it seems to involve using places like abandoned parking lots or even your garden to plant indigenous trees and shrubs to completely cover the existing space. Tiny forests create a small functional ecosystem that restores soil, protects water and air quality and acts as a biodiversity hotspot that can have a measurable effect on the local and even the regional environment. Now as much as I love this idea, I don’t think Craig will want to covert our back yard to a tiny forest. But if you have the space and the passion - think about it. Meanwhile in Melbourne Australia where Asher lives the virus is on the rise: Victoria has set a new record for its seven-day running average of daily new coronavirus infections, after tallying its second-largest one-day rise in coronavirus cases. State health authorities confirmed 108 new infections on Saturday, the highest number in a single day since March 28, when the state’s new case count peaked at 111. The major escalation in Victoria's coronavirus crisis comes as a major imposition on about 3,000 residents of public housing towers in Melbourne's north. They have been shut in their apartments with no notice, with the lockdown enforced by 500 police officers each shift — roughly one officer for every six residents. Testing of the entire building will be one of the factors determining if any of the nine affected housing blocks will stay locked down for longer than five days. �In light of these restrictions, I think it makes our restrictions look super easy. Asher says they may have a super spreader. The concern for Australians and New Zealanders is that having done such a good job of acting quickly, testing, tracing and quarantining, that they may be unable to open their borders for the foreseeable future. It’s hard to imagine tourists being willing to be tested and quarantined for 14 days upon entering either country. Time for some Oliver. He had a wonderful time with his great aunt and uncle, his cousins and his great grandmother. He also met Alfie, an Oliver sized dog. There was much licking of ears happening. ���In the second photo he can’t understand why his mother has a hamburger while he has nothing. Flashback: Edinburgh. �����From the top: Robert Burns Memorial. He was known as Rabbie Burns and is regarded as the national poet of Scotland. He only lived for 37 years and among his most notable works is the poem Auld Lang Syne. In this photo you can see me standing awkwardly by a piper. Next: Asher and I on the bridge overlooking the park; James VI of Scotlands Royal Seal (he later became James I of England and Ireland after Elizabeth I’s death); the view of Edinburgh and the castle from Carlton Hill; unfinished Acropolis on Carlton Hill, early morning. Remember: make sure you’re registered to vote, wear a mask when you leave your house, wash your hands and stand one average cow length apart from people you don’t live with. Easy peasy. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-05_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-116 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-05 Title A name given to the resource Day 116 - the day after July 4th Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/61c260db255c0140afb2a9e3ef82faf3.pdf 743ff35e4e90da60e67583511df9829f PDF Text Text Day 115 by windoworks Yesterday, in one day, the number of new cases in the US was 57,209. 57,209. Dr Fauci warned that we could see 100,000 new cases a day and I think we’re well on our way. And consider this: these are only the tested cases. In many areas, they run out of test kits while the line of cars stretch for miles. In Kent County yesterday we had 90 new cases, 17 less than the day before. Almost everyone wears a mask - more people on the streets than before, but most stores have 100% mask cover. From my friend Gina: We’re all exhausted. We’re all stuck at home. We’re all wondering how to proceed. And we’re all cross. �Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” ― Theodore Roosevelt. Today is the 4th of July. This is a federal holiday in the United States celebrating the Declaration of Independence of the United States, on July 4, 1776. The Continental Congress declared that the thirteen American colonies were no longer subject (and subordinate) to the monarch of Britain, King George III, and were now united, free, and independent states. The Congress had voted to declare independence two days earlier, on July 2, but it was not declared until July 4. Usually we get up early and walk 6 blocks to watch the Hollyhock Parade. This parade has been running annually for 85 years. There’s marching bands, floats, politicians running for re-election (or election), vintage cars and lots and lots of thrown candy. Everyone cheers and waves American flags and catches up with friends. One year I marched with Joe Jones and his team as he was running for reelection to his City Commission seat. It was one of the most memorable moments. At the end of the parade all participants meet in Hollyhock Lane for music and refreshments. I believe the parade is happening this morning but Craig and I are not going. All other parades and fireworks have been canceled this year along with pretty much everything else. And if the virus and its consequences weren’t enough, now we’re in a heatwave. For the next 13 days (that’s as far as my weather app goes) we have temperatures ranging between 91F -96F (32.7C-35.5C). This is the first morning Craig has not turned off the window a/c units and opened all the windows and doors. We are eating a diet of salads, salads and more salads. Every evening at 9:30pm, before we go to bed, we sit outside in the waning light and watch the fireflies. They rise up, little erratic blinking lights that twinkle. After a while one or both of us begin to yawn and then its time for bed. Some nights most of our neighbors are siting on their porches, just talking but last night we were the only ones. And here’s this: As a new academic year approaches, colleges and universities across the country say they are taking every precaution to safely bring their campuses back to life. But with coronavirus cases surging, especially among young people, college faculty members are demanding the right to teach remotely this fall — no questions asked. Thousands of professors, increasingly rattled by reopening plans that they say place tuition revenue above their well-being, have signed petitions calling for more flexibility to teach remotely. They argue they should not be forced to disclose medical information or make a case for keeping themselves and their families safe in the middle of a pandemic that has killed more than 125,000 Americans .A common thread is the belief that everyone deserves the right to teach remotely regardless of their health or age. With so little known �about the virus, faculty members worry about the risks to everyone, especially the nearby college dependent towns. To raise your spirits: Here is a photo from Craig’s walk this morning. ��Yesterday Zoe and Oliver drove 177 miles to Canberra to stay with her aunt and uncle and visit GG (Oliver’s great grandmother). These photos just in: ���Everyone worried that Oliver and Kym’s dog Allie wouldn’t get on, but so far so good. Flashback: Edinburgh Castle. Edinburgh Castle is a historic fortress which dominates the skyline of Edinburgh, the capital city of Scotland, from its position on the Castle Rock. Archaeologists have established human occupation of the rock since at least the Iron Age (2nd century CE), although the nature of the early settlement is unclear. There has been a royal castle on the rock since at least the reign of David I in the 12th century, and the site continued at times to be a royal residence until 1633. From the 15th century, the castle's residential role declined, and by the 17th century it was principally used as military barracks with a large garrison. Its importance as a part of Scotland's national heritage was recognised increasingly from the early 19th century onwards, and various restoration programmes have been carried out over the past century and a half. As one of the most important strongholds in the Kingdom of Scotland, Edinburgh Castle was involved in many historical conflicts from the Wars of Scottish Independence in the 14th century to the Jacobite rising of 1745. Research undertaken in 2014 identified 26 sieges in its 1100-year-old history, giving it a claim to having been "the most besieged place in Great Britain and one of the most attacked in the world". So I have to be honest and say: Wikipedia, but they say it all so much better than me. I loved Edinburgh. To this day I cannot explain why, it just spoke to me as did all of Scotland. Edinburgh Castle felt steeped in history and we explored it all. ����From the top: Asher and I walking up to the castle’s main entrance. Two years later, Craig and I sat in a temporary stand watching the massed pipe bands come out through that entrance, past the barrels of fire, on the opening night of the Edinburgh Tattoo. (But thats another story for another day). Then 3 photos from the gun turret area. It was a gorgeous fall day. More Edinburgh tomorrow. Remember: 122 days to Election Day 2020. Are you all ready to vote? Register now if you haven’t already. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-04_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-115 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-04 Title A name given to the resource Day 115 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/8643fc3c8250ed059255f7eadb1bac8b.pdf 5f3a3e527dc77270b04aa9d407df9bfc PDF Text Text 3/27/20 - 11:33 am It’s hard to believe that school shut down 16 days ago. Time feels so relative now, like we should be measuring it in some other way. What constitutes a day in these uncertain times? Is it still 24 hours, or should I measure my days in anxious fits, depres sive episodes, moments of solitude? Most gruesome, should we start marking time by COVID deaths? That’s what the news is doing. “March- 25,035 27 total deaths.” On bad days, I used to take comfort in the knowledge that somewhere on the planet, many good things are happening. A baby is being born. A couple is getting married. A father and son are taking a trip. These microcosms of happiness combine to combat whatever obstacle I’m facing at the moment. Now, though, my front line of defense against the darkness is dwindling. Across the world, weddings are being canceled. Vacations are turning into nightmares. Babies are being born into oversaturated, infected hospitals. As I race to find the light, coronavirus is three steps ahead of me, snuffing out each can dle one by one. These are dark times indeed. 3/29/20 - 1:34 pm "As the sign of a deeper truth, metaphor is close to sacrament. Because the vastness and richness of reality cannot be expressed by the overt sense of a statement alone." - Jeffr ey Burton Russell In times of extreme duress, I retreat. For as long as I can remember, my immediate response to stress has been to jump on a horse and run away, sometimes quite literally. Now, as I feel stressed and - most frustratingly - trapped, I find myself retreating into books to retain my sanity. Books are deep wells where I can pour my emotions into and drain them all through the sieve of a great story. When they emerge, they are filtered clean and pure and stable. I drink from this well copiously,greedy in my conquest for release and solitude. Unfortunately, living with your boyfriend prevents a complete retreat from happening. The boy with whom I live subsequently became, through a series of strange events, the boy that I date. We had two other roommates, one who happened to be his ex. She found herself unable to live with us being together and promptly moved out. That knocks off one. Our fourth roommate was recently laid off and moved back home to quarantine herself in. That knocks off two. What ’s left is just myself and my roommateturned-boyfriend as we navigate trying to start a new relationship while being quarantined alone together. It’s been strange trying to find ways to be together and create space for each other in a tiny apartment. We both struggle with anxiety, and this crisis has flared my OCD to a nearly unmanageable point. There’s so much that’s overwhelming about our lives and our home that I struggle to find peace. This is where my books come in. But my boyfriend has never datedbookworm a who’s content to hole herself in her room and read for 12 hours straight. He’s an outdoorsy type; he wants to do yoga, walk outside, and my clean up the earth by picking up trash. I absolutely adore him for it, but I have to express that books are way of responding to the crisis. Sometimes, getting lost in the words of my beloved poets is the only way I keep my grip. �3/30/20 - 11:03 am Woke up today without the usual chest tightness that accompanies my morning anxiety. Perhaps my brain and nervous system are settling into this new normal. I picture my little apartment as this bubble that cannot be penetrated, by people, disease or otherwise. Last night my boyfriend’s friend came over to drop off some more concrete makeshift weights for themto throw around and he stayed to chat. I’m pretty sure my heart rate was well into the 100’s imagining him as an intruder breaking through our defenses and shattering my little bubble of defense. Though he stayed well away from both of us, I was torn betwe en welcoming the social interaction and wanting to kick him out. My parents are both old, well within the demographic most at risk from the virus. My father is turning 71 in May and my mother, who’s been a smoker her whole life, turns 58 in September. Tho ugh there’s been many days I’d love nothing more than to give them both a hug, I know that I can’t. Not until I wait out the incubation period, solo, to see if I have it. Every stranger that walks through my door sets my incubation period back and makes mylong-awaited hug that much farther away. I miss the days when I could jump into people’s arms without fear. I’m a hugger, a toucher, an extrovert; I thrive in social situations and am most content in a crowded, lively room. Now, as my boyfriend and I swim this sea alone, I know I’ll never take hug a from my parents for granted again. I pray that they’ll make it through this and we’ll see many more hugs on the other side of coronavirus. 3/31/20 - 12:48 pm The air has never felt more still. The virus became real today. It became a big, swampy monster that’s wreaking havoc on my life and tearing my loved ones away from me. Last night, a close friend from high school lost his battle to the virus. He was a mere 24 years old; a baby; a blink in the universe’s eye. Yet to me, and my tight -knit circle of friends from younger days, he was everything. Ben Hirschmann- you stood up for me when nobody else would. You had a twinkle in your eye and a bellowing laugh that filled our hearts. How this virusswallowed you whole I’ll never understand; your personality and enthusiasm was larger than life, larger than this world. Today I am heartbroken. I am emotionally ransacked and vacant; I have nothing left. My fragile sanity has been teetering on madness o f r weeks now and I fear this may be the beginning of a very long descent. For while I’m aching now, I know this won’t compare to how I’ll feel in a couple weeks. The monster is coming and it is incredibly hungry. Ben will certainly not be the only casualtyI’ll suffer in the monster’s wake. I can’t reiterate enough how devastatingly real this feels now. God help us. �4/7/20 - 7:08 pm Spent the last week grieving, processing, self-destructing, and rebuilding. Wasn’t sure I’d be able to write tonight but the air felt still and calm and suddenly I was drawn to my journal. It’s incredible to me how one can find moments of stillness and peace in absolute chaos. School has felt incredibly optional though I know, internally, that it’s very much not. I’m having trouble finding the motivation to get things done when everything around me is slowly evaporating. I lost my study abroad trip/summer plans and now I’m applying for internships that probably don’t even exist anymore. It’s terrifying seeing the newsreports display the unemployment figures, and I shudder to think how dangerously close to that I am. My school job ends in a few weeks, and then what after that? 4/9/20 - 7:51 pm Today has been overwhelming, but it’s almost asinine to use that word now. We’re literally living in unprecedented times, of course everything is going to be overwhelming. But school has proven to be especially trying. Today I finally counted up everythingI had to do to finish the semester. 14 things. It amounts to roughly 32 pages of writing, at least 6 hours of coding, and then 7 hours of online exams. I am so frustrated with the amount of work that’s been given I could scream. I know that professors don ’t know how to handle this either, but they could try by not randomly assigning papers just for something to do. I have to write roughly 6 pages of justreflection papers. Reflection on what? The online class I’ve had to suffer through for a month now? Notmuch to reflect on. I was telling my boyfriend yesterday that I can’t believe we’re two days shy from it being a month into quarantine. This month has felt like a blur. It was supposed to be my busiest; my grandest month yet. I had two trips to DC planned, a conference, an event to host, new candidates to welcome. I’m a Lead Fellow in the Leadership Academy and I was so excited to hug our new cohort in person. Each person I personally interviewed, took time in crafting. We’ve pulled together an incrediblegroup of future changemakers and now I don’t know if I’ll even see them for orientation. I’m tired of wondering when all of this is going to blow over. I’m tired of the fact that the piling deaths are having less of an effect on me now. My best friend st lo her grandpa, my dad’s friend lost his father.. The list goes on and on. I yearn for better, brighter days. 4/14/20 - 4:23 pm It’s getting harder and harder to journal. It’s depressing only having bad news to report, but that’s all that’s coming in. The IMF reported today that the global economy could take a 3 point shock, the worst since the Great Depression. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared to graduate into a depression. My family lost everything in the ’08 recession, and it’s taken us 12 year s to crawl back from square one. They say they’re doing okay now, but I fear the worst for my family in these coming days. I remember the last time we were so poor we �couldn’t afford groceries; those days felt so hopeless. I’m certainly not prepared for wh at’s coming, but how can you be? My mom told me today that life as we know it is over. I pray that it isn’t true, but, I know deep down she’s right. With the coming depression and the way lives have already been altered, there’s no way we can go back to normal. I know, too, that normalcy will be unachievable for the families who have had loved ones ripped away. The family of my friend Ben who died just a couple weeks ago is not done with their turmoil. Now, the father of the family has fallen ill as well. All over stories are coming in from households who are losing multiple people at a time and can’t hold a funeral. After all, the CDC traced the entire Chicago outbreak to just a single person who attended a funeral in the city. Now, because of that one person, ten thousand people in the city are infected, and I fear my parents are next. The virus is so infectious that if one person in the house gets it the others are likely to follow suit. How terribly violent and senseless it is to lose multiple family members in one sitting. Yet again, I remember this happens daily to people all over the world. In the Gaza strip, bombings regularly ravage families. In sub-saharan Africa, infant mortality kills 40% of babies before they’re even born. Are we privileged people finally getting a taste of the chaos we so carelessly create? I’m still mourning the loss of my summer plans and now my hopes for the fall are fading. If we can’t contain the virus or find a vaccine, it’s likely that the fall semester will be moved online as well. As difficult of a decision as it would be, I think I would defer for that semester and hold my hopes out for winter. I refuse to lose my senior year to this pandemic after I’ve already lost so much. From my apartment I can still hear the bells of the clock tower rolling over from campus. Those bells, which used to peeve me on my way to class, now sound like the melancholy remnants of a distant past. What I would give to be annoyed by those bells just one more time! I suppose the good news in all of this is that I’m still alive. I’m healthy, I have a roof over my head, food in my fridge, and a boyfriend who continues to be my rock through all of this. Perhaps all is not lost. 4/16/20 - 3:11 pm The days are starting to muddle together and th e moments are losing their luster. I need to feel reinvigorated but it’s hard with so much stress weighing down on my shoulders. In these tense times, though, I have found moments of extreme tenderness, and I began recording them. These are some of my favo rite things from the last week: ● ● ● ● ● ● ● The mouthwatering smell of fresh garlic and good olive oil sizzling in a pan The warmth I feel when my boyfriend holds me and I’m enveloped in his smell of tea tree oil and sandalwood Waking up to my cat lazily stretched out beside me, the sun rays warming her belly The comforting, homely smell of fresh coffee brewed in the morning, my hands wrapped around the steamy mug Signs of growth from plants I’ve been nurturing all year The happy look in my cats eye when she watches snowflakes fall through the window The roaring, resounding laughter of my friends coming through the phone, showering me with love and happiness �Yes, things are bad, but they can be relatively good too. Youstjuhave to find the silver linings. 4/18/20 - 3:01 pm Today my family and I were told that my grandmother’s nursing home has been exploded with cases of COVID-19. I have dreaded this day ever since I learned about the virus, knowing full well itsplications im for the older demographics. My poor grandmother Rosemary Risk, aka the light of this world, has been battling dementia for about ten years now. I used to wake up at 5 am before school every day and go give her a bath, change her diapers and shee ts, and sit with her while she ate her breakfast. She’s the sweetest little lady, always humming as she walks around. During bath times, she used to make me sing all of her favorite old showtunes. These are the lyrics to her favorite one: Here we are, out of cigarettes Holding hands and yawning, look how late it gets Two sleepy people, by dawn's early light And too much in love to say good night Here we are in the cozy chair Pickin' on a wishbone from the Frigidaire Two sleepy people with nothing to say And too much in love to break away Do you remember the nights we used to linger in the hall? Mm-hmm, your father didn't like me, at all Do you remember the reason why we married in the fall? To rent this little nest and get a bit of rest Well, here we are, just about the same Foggy little fella, drowsy little dame Two sleepy people, by dawn's early light And too much in love to say good night Here we are, don't we look a mess Lipstick on your collar, Wrinkles in my dress Two sleepy people, who know very well They're too much in love to break the spell Here we are, crazy in head Gee you're eyes are gorgeous, even when they're red Two sleepy people, by dawn's early light And too much in love to say good night Do you remember when we went dancing at the Palomar? When it was over why naturally we cuddled in the car So you ran out of gas, and I was green as grass Here we are keeping up the pace �Letting each tomorrow slap us in the face Two sleepy people, by dawn's early light And too much in love to say good night Grandma, I am too much in love to say goodnight to you. Please don’t leave us yet. 5/5/20 - 12:51 pm I took a break from journaling after the winter semester ended. I was so terribly burnt out after my grandma passed away that I needed a break from my own thoughts. Now I’m back to consultant work/journaling and can affirm that, oddly enough, things are pretty normal as far as quarantines and pandemics go. Life has definitely slowed down and adapted to the new conditions. I’ve been drawing quite a bit, planting and preparing my garden, and renovating my apartment. My boyfriend and I have grown quite a few egetables v from seeds and we’re hoping to get them all in the ground by the end of May. Some of the hardier vegetables like asparagus and kale have already been planted outside and I check on them like a dutiful mother. I’m pretty sure our neighbors think we’re nuts for having a full garden outside of our dinky college apartment complex but we take pride in our little oasis. Watching everything grow from seeds into strong young plants has been such a fun journey for us while we remain isolated in our home.ouring P ourselves into our hobbies has been a great way to stay sane. In unrelated news, 2020 has decided to play a new joke on us by introducing literal murder hornetsinto the narrative. Japanese murder hornets have somehow made their way over to the Nor theast coast and prove to be the icing on the cake of the strangest year ever. These giant hornets grow to be-32 inches in size and prey on precious bumblebees. They use sharp mandibles to decapitate the bees and take their thoraxes to feed their young. Japanese honeybees have developed certain adaptations that allow them to fight off the hornets, but our American honeybees have not. Entomologists say if we can’t eradicate all the hornet colonies within a year, we won’t be able to stop them from rooting he re permanently and decimating bee populations. To boot, hornets are so venomous that a few stings can kill a human. How much more fucked up can this year get?? I was watching a sweet, fat little bumblebee lazily sniff my begonia bush the other day and thought of it being decapitated by a murder hornet. I sincerely hope they fix the issue before it’s too late. 5/6/20 - 1:01 pm Found out today that I’m eligible to receive a huge grant from GV through the CARES Act to help support me financially through this pandemic. I’m really grateful for the extra income because now I can afford to help cushion my family a little bit through the crisis as well. My dad’s job is based on sports advertising, so the lack of sports has taken a huge toll on his income. My mo ther completely lost her job due to the pandemic so the only thing keeping them afloat right now is her unemployment benefits and my dad’s struggling income. We don’t complain because we know that we have it far better than many other people. There’s somuch talk about certain businesses that probably will never recover from this setback. They say we’re headed for an economic downfall that could rival the Great Depression, and I’m afraid for what the future holds. My brother is a prominent chef in New Yor k, but he’s not sure he’ll have a job when all of this is �said and done. New York relies on the tourism and food industry, and it’s damn near collapsed without it. My sister owns a little vintage clothing boutique in Brooklyn that may also never open its doors again. I’m trying to remain optimistic but, quite frankly, there isn’t much hope to hold on to. My family barely survived the last recession so I’m nervous about these projections. All I can do is hold on to the hope that maybe things aren’t as bad as they seem and we can find a way to bounce back sooner than we thought. I read an article today, though, that showed evidence Trump shelved a CDC document meant to help reopen the economy and provide safety guidelines. Why the document will never see the light of day is beyond me when so many people have been begging for ways to slowly reopen the economy and get people back to work. The stupidity of the Trump administration never ceases to amaze me, and I blame the president wholeheartedly for his impotence and lack of leadership in these times of duress. 5/7/20 - 8:48 am Today is the day! After months and months of quarantine and only seeing one familiar face, I am finally going to see another friend! My best friend and soul sister Lisa has been quaran tined with her boyfriend for the last couple of months. They both have the privilege (like I do) of working from home so it’s safe to say we will not be giving each other the virus. She was going to come visit me this past weekend, but she started getting severe back pains after a morning run. After a virtual doctors appointment and a carefully -socially-distanced MRI, we found out she has a bulging disk in her back. The poor thing will be bed bound for the next couple months and has to undergo physical ther apy to recover. I decided to surprise her to cheer her up by coming to visit with my boyfriend. She doesn’t know that I’m coming but her boyfriend does, and he says she’s been terribly glum. I do hope that our presence will lighten her spirit as being arou nd her will surely lighten mine. It has been so long since I was able to see others and hold them. I can’t wait to go! 5/9/20 - 7:31 pm It’s getting hard to find things to journal about because everyday is like groundhogs day! Seems like I have the same routine every day, the only difference between them is the amount of anxiety I’m carrying. I recently started taking pills to help cope with my severe anxiety. The pandemic and its stress have exacerbated my anxieties, making it nearly impossible to getthrough the week without a panic attack or emotional breakdown. It’s difficult being transparent about this knowing that someone will read this journal years after it’s writing and may judge me for my choices, but please understand how excruciating thishole w process has been. I’ve never been the type to turn to pills to get myself through; I hardly even take Motrin when I have a headache. Usually my anxiety is mild enough to be cleared up with a good strain of marijuana. The anxiety I’m dealing with nowsi a whole other beast; one I haven’t battled in many years. I knew that my mental health would take a turn with all of these changes but I didn’t expect a reaction like this. Every day there is a new looping circuit of anxiety in my head, swirling round an d round like a whirlpool. I can’t fight the currents alone, so the Xanax helps me swim to shore. I wish it didn’t have to be this way but my boyfriend reminds me that needing medication doesn’t make you weak; sometimes the strongest thing you can do is ask for help. I really need help and, for better or for worse, the pills help make these anxious days bearable. I do hope that I’m able to stand without them soon. �5/21/20 - 9:01 pm Today was an extremely hard but rewarding day. Without going into too much detail, my -girlfriend ex and I had a very passionate but tumultuous relationship for two years. We became so enveloped in each other that we lost our own independent identities. That, coupled with her family’s constant rejection of me and her sexuality in general, made the relationship a miserable chore. Despite that, I loved and continue to love her deeply and wish that it had worked out. I think the hardest breakups are the ones wh ere two people just aren’t right for each other no matter how real the love is. We broke up mid -January, and I started dating my boyfriend a few months later. The quick transition shocked both of us, and I hadn’t expected to move on so fast and neither did she. I’m a big believer that you can love multiple people at once, and the timing of my new relationship was incredibly unfortunate. It has made it difficult for my ex and I to stay friends, an endeavor we deeply wished for. Today, she came over to grabhet last of her things and give mine back. It was an incredibly emotional encounter filled with lots of tears, hugs, a couple joints, and some Taco Bell. We smoked in her car and ate tacos like we used to after practice when we played Grand Valley lacrosse together. It was jarring to be so near her doing familiar things when I’ve seen no one but my boyfriend in my house for the last few months. I know she’s been quarantining herself properly so I wasn’t worried about catching the virus, and it was so enriching to hug somebody new. We were able to find real closure and make progress towards embracing the new roles we have for each other. I’m so grateful to have a wonderful boyfriend who gives me the space to mourn my past relationship as we grow our new, beaut iful one. He’s so tender and genuine and I feel so lucky to have him. It is my dear hope that my ex and I will reconcile and she can get to know him the way I do. 5/25/20 - 11:43 am It’s hard trying to remember the last time I had a day without anxiet y. It eats at my insides, gnawing at what’s left of my hollow bones. 6/23/20 - 10:21 am So here it is, my first diary entry in nearly a month. I didn’t realize so much time had gone by, but then again, time had begun to mean nothing at all. I debated writing any of this because I didn’t want my dark times memorialized in the University archives, but in the end I knew vulnerability was the only option. I promised myself I’d not edit or water down any of my feelings or experiences so that thislittle snapshot in time would be as real as possible. I had somewhat of a mental breakdown weeks ago. I was going through the motions of daily life, trying to be as normal as possible, but everything felt hollow. I realized my use of anxiety medication wa s becoming addictive, so I did what I knew I had to do - cut cold turkey. Three days after my decision to quit, my parents informed me they were going through another separation. They’ve done this thrice before, but never has it been so explosive, or final.They began filing with attorneys immediately. I found it difficult to get out of bed every morning, and it took incredible amounts of patience from my boyfriend who gently coaxed me alive every day. I took to long hours of meditation and silence to cope ith w my anxiety, and eventually my frayed �nerves began to settle. Then, on May 25, George Floyd died. And the events that followed have certainly changed my life, and the lives of many others. This is a journal about the coronavirus pandemic, certainly, but I would be remiss if I did not memorialize my experiences during the beginning of what will certainly be a large chapter in the history books. George Floyd’s death is the spark that will flame an entire revolution, and I’ve seen the front lines of history. If you are a reader looking at this diary years after I am gone, surely you too will know how George Floyd. You will know more than I about the repercussions that follow the waves of his death, and I am hopeful that history is favorable to our revolution. I hope that his death will not be in vain. George Floyd is only one in thousands of black people that have died at the hands of racist police. We took to the streets in the days after Floyd’s death, but there were so many others we were marching for. Breanna Taylor. Ahmaud Arbery. J ustin Howell. Alton Sterling. Philando Castile. Oscar Grant. Sandra Bland. I could fill pages upon pages of this journal with the names of black lives lost to police brutality. We marched, protested, chanted, and burned down buildings and police precincts for them. In my city of Grand Rapids, we took to the streets for a silent march, a peaceful protest. We did not bring weapons or gear, but signs and our anger. We brought a desire for justice to the march, and the police showed up in riot gear. They cornered us in the streets with tanks and suped up police trucks. They barricaded off the streets to the police precinct so that no one could touch it. Before a protestor had so much as raised a fist, the police marched out in single formation, dressed in military style riot gear with shields, face masks, rubber bullet guns, tear gas canisters, batons, and even many real guns. Tear gas, which was deemed illegal to use in war after WWI, was used mercilessly on protestors who knelt on the ground with their hands up, screaming “don’t shoot!” I was on the front lines, my heart racing as we formed a barricade of white people to protect people of color from the police. We were weaponizing our privilege to protect those who have been targeted. The hatred from the police was so visceral; their gazes cut me like knives. I could feel their disgust that we were on the “other side.” I had never felt the reality of the police state until I was face to face with it, locked in a showdown that I was hopeless to win. They tear gassed us to much I felt like I was truly dying. I couldn’t see or breathe, and people were running and screaming in every direction. They shot rockets off and eventually rubber bullets. I was knees down on the ground, face in my hands as my eyes burned like fire, when a kind stranger lifted back my hair and poured milk on my face. I choked at first and then relaxed as the milk cooled my burning eyes. The stranger handed me water and I drank, grateful and unable to speak. I never caught their name as they ran away to continue helping, but I will never forget that moment of humanity. I will also never forget the way the police herded us like animals for slaughter, just for asking them to stop killing black lives. I will never forget how a peaceful protest was transformed into a war zone by cops who incited an agitated crowd. I will never forget when they brought guns and we brought signs. And reader, I hope you never forget this too. I hope these words burn into the back of your mind forever: We are not free in a police state. We are not free until every systemically racist institution is dismantled. Equality cannot be achieved without equity first. Demand reparations. �� Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Anonymous COVID-19 Journal Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Anonymous Description An account of the resource Journal of an anonymous GVSU student's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-06-23 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-06-23_ANON-034 Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/ce32c46471d74e7cca31e54b0498e5e7.pdf 446391883367ec2568b97138688c1b83 PDF Text Text 1 Monday, March 30, 2020 We’ve just begun week three of having all of our classes online and my dominant thought today is, Monday’s are even harder now than they already were! I spent the weekend lazing around home where I live with my mom, dad, and teenage sister. Because Governor Gretchen Whitmer passed a stay-at-home order last week, none of us had anywhere to be. We watched the news, sat around, chatted a bit, watched some movies, watched more of the news. I felt like I was in an alternate dimension. Waking up this morning and realizing that I needed to catch up on class work, homework, and due dates made me feel almost confused. How can I do school when I suddenly have no structure? How can I think about learning French when the entire world is closed down and the study abroad trip I had planned for this summer is cancelled? How can I think about practicing clarinet - my major - when my recital is cancelled anyway? I entered into this stay at home period full of optimism, thinking it would be similar to when I lived at home in high school. My older brother has moved out of our family home already, so I set up his old bedroom as my own school/music practice room and prepared to go to “class” each day. But wow, it has not been that simple. Mainly because of the fact that it feels like the world is breaking down. None of us alive today have ever seen anything like this coronavirus epidemic. This means that as a young adult, I do not have the luxury of asking my elders, what did you do when you went through this? They never did. I can’t really look to the adults in my life for comfort because I can see through their masks of calm to the anxiety many of them feel underneath. My mother is a Registered Nurse, currently working at Blodgett Hospital in Grand Rapids. She has been a nurse ever since she graduated from college, and I’ve always looked up to her for her compassion for others, which I can almost describe as fierce. My mother will protect you, you have no choice in the matter, that’s what it feels like! I’ve watched her come home from her 14-15 hour long shifts at the hospital, which are technically only supposed to be 12 hours long, exhausted and heart-sore. She is the strongest woman I’ve ever known and she has never been afraid of anything. But now, when she comes home from work I see not only exhaustion and stress, but also fear. Back at the beginning of this when many were still convinced that the whole thing would blow over and we would all be fine, my mom was hearing the truth from other hospitals who were already facing a battle against coronavirus. She sat my sister and I down and explained that she didn’t want us visiting with anyone (this was before the governor mandated the same order). She said, “most importantly, I don’t want either of you two or Dad getting sick. I also don’t really want to be sick myself, but even more important than that, I need to be able to help at work. If I get sick I can’t help them fight this at work.” I’m sure those weren’t her exact words, but that was the gist, and even though I was sad that I would literally have to cancel the plans I had made for the following day, I decided then that I would stand with her and support her in any way she needed. Since then I’ve seen many newscasts honoring healthcare workers and pointing out the fact that without them, we wouldn’t have a chance against this virus. They’ve equated healthcare �2 workers to soldiers, saying that they are our first line of defense for this invisible enemy. People are finally seeing how hard they work, how ridiculously stressful their jobs are. It is easy to take these things for granted when the world is not in chaos. This virus has pulled many things into the light for humanity as a whole, and I hope we take the chance to learn from it and grow in a way we never have before. Tuesday, March 31, 2020 Yesterday I felt like there were a million thoughts racing through my head, about politics, about my friends, about my schoolwork and my family. Today, I swung in the opposite direction and had a hard time focusing on anything at all. I told my friends and my boyfriend that I was taking a break from technology today, because I felt too tired and drained to talk to anyone. I am an extrovert, so I get my energy from interacting with other people. Ironically, interacting with people online has the opposite effect. I don’t like holding seven different conversations, one through text, a few through facebook messenger, and a handful through snapchat. This is what I’ve been doing since I’ve been stuck at home and the incessant sound of my phone buzzing is driving me absolutely insane. I want to see my friends and family members with my own eyes, and hear their voices and be able to hug them! That is where I get my energy from! I’ve definitely been making good use of the many different video chatting apps such as facetime, google duo, google hangouts, and zoom, and those are wonderful ways to stay in touch but I am craving an opportunity to sit down across from my best friend at a coffee shop and just talk about anything. Or cuddle with my boyfriend on the couch watching a movie. I find myself missing my grandparents the most because neither of them are tech-savvy enough to use video chat. In the past, visiting my grandparents has served as a way for me to escape reality. I have my paternal grandfather, who lives five minutes from me in a tiny house that’s full of stories, and my maternal grandmother who lives in an old country house which is filled to the brim with her quirky, artsy personality. I need to call them more! Both of them have a way of making me feel like life is bigger than me and my problems. Now more than ever before I would love to drive out to my grandma’s house, away from my town, away from my school and work, and just breathe in the day with her. But both of my grandparents are in the “high risk” category of people during this coronavirus disaster. I cannot visit them, in case I’ve picked up the virus at some point. They also both have health conditions that put them in the very high risk category, so if they were to catch this virus, they would be in a massive amount of danger. I have a difficult time considering the fact that before all of this is over, I could be missing members of my family. As of right now, I do not know a single person who has the virus. I’ve obviously heard about tons of people getting it, but there is no one I know personally who is sick. I don’t consider myself to be very religious, but I pray to God that it stays that way. �3 Thursday, April 2, 2020 We just got the order from the Governor today that the rest of the school year for grades k-12 if officially cancelled. My younger sister Elise is currently a high school senior, so I feel like she got a pretty bad deal out of this. This was her final year with the people that she has been going to school with for her entire life. School was initially cancelled for them with little to no warning in mid-March so there was never time to say goodbye to anybody. She doesn’t get to walk for graduation unless they are able to pull something together at the beginning of the fall semester but it doesn’t seem like that would work very well because most of the students, Elise included, will be starting college at that time. She also doesn’t get to have a graduation party which I personally find to be the most unfortunate part. My experience at mine and all my friends’ graduation parties was that it was a time for everyone to honor the graduate’s hard work and accomplishments. I felt so special at my party in 2016. My Dad put together a few photo boards documenting my life, my Grandma decorated a beautiful box for me to put cards in, and my Mom made sure that I had vases of colorful flowers on the tables, and other music-themed decorations. Elise is much more introverted than me so I suspect she isn’t as heartbroken about missing out on this as we might expect her to be, but still, I wish she could have that. My only other sibling is my older brother, Drew. He lives with his fiancé Shannon and their two cats, and they have always had to scrape by with an insufficient amount of money. Because of the coronavirus, both of them have gotten laid off from their jobs. This has happened to an immense number of Americans which has caused the system they need to use to apply for unemployment to crash. With absolutely no income and no unemployment benefits as of yet, they are in an incredibly tight spot. Today my mom put together a box full of food for them to take back to the house they rent. To prevent spreading any germs back and forth, she put the box outside for them to pick up and though we went out on the porch to say hello, we kept our distance from them, like we’re supposed to! I actually cheated today with the social distancing… I absolutely take it seriously and have not seen any of my friends in person since this all started. But today I desperately wanted to see my best friend. Since it was the first sunny day we’ve had in nearly a week, she and I meet up at some trails to walk together and chat. We truly did stay at least six feet apart the entire time and we didn’t hug or anything, but it was wonderful to be able to see and talk to someone standing in front of me! Though it was extremely refreshing, it almost made me feel more lonely when I got back home. Since my Dad is now working from home at a makeshift desk he set up in the middle of our home, we find ourselves having to be quiet all day during the week. When my Mom is off work she keeps busy with chores and tasks around the house, and my extremely introverted sister likes to stay in her bedroom and read, write, or draw. That leaves me to attempt to entertain myself so I feel very acutely the lack of socialization. My boyfriend wanted to drop off a mystery gift to me today, so I baked some chocolate chip pumpkin bread to trade with him, and I was so excited! But in the middle of the day I got a voicemail from him saying that he had had a sore throat for the past couple days, and although he was almost certain it was only seasonal allergies, he didn’t want to risk passing anything on to �4 me or my family and therefore wouldn’t be coming. My mom expressed how much she appreciated his caution, but although I appreciate it too, I was disappointed to not have even that small bit of connection with him. The world is becoming a strange new place now. Last week I called my doctor’s office to try and reschedule an appointment that I had coming up. The nurse who answered the phone asked me to wait just a moment while she checked the calendar for later in the summer. A few seconds later I heard her whispering to herself, saying something like “no I didn’t mean to do that, go back,” speaking to her computer. I found this a little comical but tried to stop myself from laughing until I was saved the trouble by her own laugh and her apology as she said “things have been pretty crazy around here lately.” In that moment, though she and I were sharing a laugh together, I felt bad for her too thinking about how truly hectic it probably was at that doctor’s office. Another similar instance happened when I called Grand Valley student accounts to ask a question. A woman picked up and asked how she could help me but as I started to ask my question, I heard a baby cry loudly in the background. I paused and could tell the woman was trying to shush the baby and respond to my question at the same time. Unlike the nurse, this woman didn’t sound ready to laugh. She sounded stressed and tired. She quickly answered my question and I said thank you and let her go as quickly as I could, then took a moment to feel impressed that this woman was still able to give me a concise answer while taking care of a baby at her home. On a lighter note, it’s fun to watch the news now and notice all the different locations news anchors are suddenly reporting from. Many that I’ve seen have equipment set up in their homes and conduct business as usual from a distance. One news anchor was in his “man cave,” another in her living room with the dog laying on the floor in the background. The entire network of people who deliver the news to us on TV is scattered, yet they still manage to do their jobs. They have also made a habit of reporting light and happy stories about how people are stepping up to help in the effort to overcome the coronavirus, or about the different ways that those stuck at home have found to entertain themselves, from having puzzle tournaments, to writing funny songs, to learning how to draw. I’ve definitely noticed among the people in my own life that creativity is making a comeback. My grandma is a painter who hadn’t been painting the last several months, yet when I talked with her on the phone a couple weeks ago, she told me about how she was painting lots of things and exploring new styles and subjects that she had never done before. My sister pulled out a massive piece of paper that she had been saving and decided to start meticulously drawing a horse on it. My mother, who used to write beautiful poetry and still does occasionally, decided to start writing down some of her thoughts and experiences similarly to how I am doing right now. Our neighborhood has also come up with a way for kids to still have a fun easter egg hunt this year despite not being able to gather with a church community or family like they may have done in the past. We all received notes in our mailboxes detailing a neighborhood easter egg hunt. Kids will walk up and down the streets with their parents looking for participating houses. The houses that decide to participate hang strings of colored plastic eggs from their trees, mailboxes, �5 or eaves so that they are visible to kids walking along the street. The kids then count the eggs and try to find as many as possible. It sounds like a wonderful way to get our little community together without actually being together! Friday, April 3, 2020 I thought this would be an interesting additive. I was scrolling through Facebook and discovered a post that people have begun to copy and share so that it will appear in their memories in the future: Just so I NEVER forget….. April 2, 2020 ● Gas price a mile from home was $1.40 ● School cancelled - yes cancelled (students left March 12 and wouldn’t return) ● Self-distancing measures on the rise ● Tape on the floors at grocery stores and others to help distance shoppers (6 ft) from each other ● Limited number of people inside stores, therefore, lineups outside the store doors ● Non-essential stores and businesses mandated closed ● Parks, trails, entire cities locked up ● Entire sports seasons cancelled ● Concerts, tours, festivals, entertainment events - cancelled ● Weddings, family celebrations, holiday gatherings - cancelled ● No masses, churches are closed ● No gatherings of 50 or more, then 20 or more, now no gatherings of 5 or more ● Don’t socialize with anyone outside of your home ● Children’s outdoor play parks are closed ● We are to distance from each other ● Shortage of masks, gowns, gloves for our front-line workers ● Shortage of ventilators for the critically ill ● Panic-buying sets in and we have no toilet paper, no disinfecting supplies, no paper towel, no laundry soap, no hand sanitizer ● Shelves are bare ● Manufacturers, distilleries and other businesses switch their lines to help make visors, masks, hand sanitizer and PPE ● Government closes the border to all non-essential travel ● Fines are established for breaking the rules �6 ● Stadiums adn recreation facilities open up for the overflow of Covid-19 patients ● Press conferences daily from the President ● Daily updates on new cases, recoveries, and deaths ● Government incentives to stay home ● Barely anyone on the roads ● People wearign masks and gloves outside ● Essential service workers are terrified to go to work ● Medical field workers are afraid to go home to their families This is the Novel Coronavirus (Covid-10) Pandemic, declared March 11th, 2020 Why, you ask, do I write this status? One day it will show up in my memory feed, and it will be a yearly reminder that life is precious and not to take the things we dearly love for granted. We have so much! Be thankful. Be grateful. Be kind to each other - love one another - support everyone. We are all one! <3 Copy and share. Whoever first created this is someone who realizes how important it will be to remember this time in the future when it is finally over. My generation has always heard about the horrors of 9/11, which happened when we were too young to remember. Yet we still can feel the terror and grief of those who lived it. Our children will learn about the Covid-19 pandemic, and hopefully they will be able to draw hope from however we end up overcoming it. Friday, April 10, 2020 Yesterday our stay at home order was extended by Governor Whitmer to the end of April. We have already been stuck at home for weeks and looking at several more like this is a bleak thought. I have been staying busy with school but school becomes extremely tedious and suffocating when the experience is not shared with friends and other sources of support. �7 Unsurprisingly, the weather day to day seems to have the biggest effect on my moods - it’s the only thing that ever changes. Right now it is cold and cloudy and still outside and days like this make me feel the most trapped and the least in control of my life. Though I agree with the steps that have been taken to slow the spread of the virus, I hate having to abide by all the new rules. We must stay in our homes at all times. The only time it is acceptable to leave is when you must make necessary trips to buy food or supplies, go to the bank, etc., or when you walk your dog. I recently read somewhere that the new rule is that you are only allowed to take your dog for one walk a day, and that counts as your excursion for exercise for the day. Meaning that we are not even supposed to walk through our own neighborhoods more than once a day. Grocery stores and any other businesses that are allowed to remain open must now limit the number of people who are inside the building at the same time to 4 customers for every 1000 sq. feet of floor space. I will be interested to see what humanity actually learns from this experience. I read something somewhere that a person wrote saying, our grandfathers were asked to go fight in wars and we’re being asked to stay home and watch TV, what’s the big deal? Aside from being insensitive, this comment is missing an important factor that makes this current “war” different from any we’ve fought in recent memory. This is that we are not allowed to comfort each other, or do anything really. Something terrifying has hit and it’s not just our country, it’s every country around the world. There’s nowhere to go to escape this. Now when we need hugs and hand holds more than ever, not only are we not allowed to, but doing so would be to risk the safety of those we love. Now when we need distraction more than ever - and have in fact been used to distraction for most of our adult lives - we are instead forced to sit home with our thoughts and brood. There is much good coming out of this as people adapt and grow to be able to help others, yet this new life also brings the damaged parts of our society into stark relief. Saturday, April 11, 2020 Today I wanted to take a moment to focus on our president, Donald Trump. I’ve been avoiding talking about him because my writing will become one long rant if I do. But I found an article that I wanted to add here which describes many of the reasons why I think he is the worst possible person to be leading our country through this crisis. It is called “This Is Trump’s Fault” (the main reason it caught my eye), and cites actions that he has taken during his presidency to lead us straight into this fire. ● Quotes Trump on March 13 saying “I don’t take responsibility at all” ● Previously promised that casualties could be held near zero - has since changed his stance to the opinion that if we keep the death toll under 200,000 people, then apparently we’ve done a wonderful job. �8 ● The federal government let maintenance contracts lapse in 2018, which caused a loss of stockpiled respirators to breakage ● Failure to store sufficient protective medical gear ● States are competing against each other for access to the limited equipment available to combat the infection ● Spent nearly 10 weeks after discovering the coronavirus insisting that it was as harmless as the flu ● Failure to close borders early ● Constant (CONSTANT) lying about the actual facts of the case, which his medical advisors then have to correct him on ● Many key government jobs were empty or filled by unqualified people ● Trump’s ignorant son-in-law inserted as commander in chief of national medical supply chain. The coronavirus began in China in late December, 2019. The Trump administration was officially notified of the outbreak on January 3rd, 2020. The United State’s first confirmed diagnosis of coronavirus appeared in mid-January. The first person known to have died from the disease lost their fight on February 29, 2020. By March 20, New York City (our epicenter) had confirmed 5,600 cases. Only after this, on March 21, did the government begin marshaling a national supply chain to combat the threat. Between this date and January 3, Trump and his government did nothing except insist that the virus was not a threat. Wishful thinking. What disgusts me the most about Donald Trump is not his incompetence, but rather his compulsive lying which cause confusion and opposition at a time when the people of the United States should be working together, and also his lack of empathy or urgency as he decides that 200,000 deaths would be a small price to pay. Horrifying, disappointing, disgusting. Thursday, April 16, 2020 I have now been home from school for over a month. My Dad has been working from home for nearly the entire time so that I have to try and be quiet as much as possible during the day so that he can focus. I don’t have any problem with this that is aimed at him, but I’ve started to feel that there is so much pent up energy in me that I need to run and scream and jump and dance and go wild, but there is no outlet for me to do those things because I am never alone. I cannot say I would rather be alone during this period of self-quarantine (I’m very grateful for my family and my house!) but I desperately miss feeling free. I miss being able to visit friends and family spontaneously, and I miss that feeling of elation I would sometimes get when I realized I was the only one home. I would love to open the windows, blast some music, and sing and dance like a fool until I’m too tired, but all I can do is sit quietly and work on school. Tomorrow it will be exactly a month since I’ve been able to hug my boyfriend, and longer than that since I’ve been able to hug any of my friends. I’ve been staying in touch with all my friends and my wonderful �9 grandparents, but there is hardly anything for us to talk about when our days consist of absolutely nothing! I haven’t wanted to write like this because it sounds so negative and pessimistic, but today I’m really struggling. I’ve been reading a lot of books and watching a lot of movies and TV shows in my free time. They offer an escape from real life, and a chance for me to feel things that I wouldn’t otherwise have any reason to feel. In the past I’ve gravitated more toward light comedies when choosing movies or TV shows to watch, but lately I’ve gone more for dramas or mysteries things that make me feel and think. I’m wondering if I shouldn’t take so many adventures through books and movies though, because every time I come back to reality, I feel a little more caged in. Saturday, April 18, 2020 All I have been able to think about - despite trying hard not to - is the idiocy of President Donald Trump. He goes back and forth and contradicts himself daily, causing confusion and at this point anger and frustration. He won’t stop trying to blame literally anyone else for his failures, and especially when he tries to go up against state governors like New York’s Anthony Cuomo, it becomes evident that despite being the president, he somehow doesn’t have a solid grasp on the US constitution. In the last several weeks, I have heard Donald Trump go from literally claiming that he has “total control” over the states and whether or not they close to fight the virus, to telling governors “you are going to call your own shots” (which they had the right to do in the first place, based on the conduct laid out in the constitution), to then tweeting (how ludicrous is that in the first place) “LIBERATE MICHIGAN,” “LIBERATE VIRGINIA,” and “LIBERATE MINNESOTA.” In one of these tweets he added that citizens should rise up against their governors to fight for their second amendment rights which are “under siege”. First of all, the 2nd amendment is the right to bear arms. Does this mean that Trump was implying citizens should use weapons in their protests?? I cannot even begin to understand how someone who is the face of our nation can get away with saying things like this, and over social media of all things. What is more, he has backed states that have decided to reopen AND attempted to take credit for their reopening by claiming again that he has power over that. Trump’s actions are so random and nonsensical, that no one can keep track of them. I read multiple articles on this man every day and each time I learn something brand new. Further, each new thing I learn contradicts some other thing he did recently. I am now reading an article discussing Trump’s insane actions having to do with the tweets mentioned above. He recently announced a set of guidelines that states should follow before beginning to loosen restrictions in order to prevent any resurgence of the coronavirus. None of the three states that he openly �10 addressed in his tweets met the requirements which HE HIMSELF LAID OUT to be ready to reopen. This event is exemplary of the kind of things Trump does on a daily basis which make little to no sense, and only serve to turn citizens against each other. An interesting thing to note about this is that the three states Trump targeted with his tweets are led by Democratic governors who are apparently politically competitive with Trump. In other words, they stand a chance at beating him in the upcoming 2020 presidential election. I am sad to say that this past week in Michigan, conservatives protested at the state capital in Lansing, gathering together in a large group to claim that Governor Gretchen Whitmer is taking away our rights as citizens of the United States. They complain that she is taking away our freedom by putting a stay-at-home order in place, and that we must all come together to fight her and get her out of office. I truly do not understand how it is possible that people can be so incredibly STUPID. Gretchen Whitmer is doing a fine job in office by taking action to prevent the spread of the virus. She listens carefully to what the top medical experts of the country say should be done, she consults with other governors, she consults with specialists at some of the top universities in the country to make her decisions. To make the claim not only that people’s rights are being taken away, but that it is the fault of Gretchen Whitmer is utter BULLSHIT. They gather to fight for the right to continue life as normal at a time when a horrific virus has rendered the ENTIRE WORLD helpless to stop its spread. Except that according to the smart people who actually know what they’re talking about, there is one thing we can do to help, and that is to social distance. These utter imbeciles have failed to grasp this concept. Not only does their meeting alone potentially increase the spread of coronavirus, but they are protesting for something that would likely kill them. It is as if they are begging to be poisoned. But somehow they do not see this. These people follow the direction of President Donald Trump, who throughout his life and presidency has openly incited violence, mocked minority groups, disrespected women, and NEVER taken responsibility for any of his idiodic choices. They claim they like Trump because he is open and honest about his actions but it seems that they’ve failed to notice the countless times he has blatantly contradicted his own words. By countless, I do mean countless. It has happened so many times that we all expect it now. In fact, it is becoming increasingly apparent that Trump’s greatest care right now is not in fact the prevention of lives being lost to the coronavirus, but rather his own chances of reelection in 2020. If I were speaking out loud right now I would be screaming from frustration. I am unable to think clearly because of the frustration I have with Donald Trump. He is truly the worst thing to happen to our country. He is going to cause more deaths in a variety of ways, for instance by pushing to reopen too soon and thus causing a resurgence, or by encouraging violent uprisings with his reference to the 2nd amendment (the right to bear arms!). Tuesday, May 5, 2020 I haven’t written for quite a while for two reasons. First, there are really no words for what is happening right now in our country. It is carnage. Second, for the sake of my mental health, I’ve �11 been trying to avoid reading more than an article in a day. Some days I’ve avoided any news of the outside world altogether. Days like that almost feel like a dream. It is difficult to stomach the state of our country right now. The coronavirus has brought all our dysfunction into the light. Donald Trump leads the charge for those who want the right to do whatever they want even if it means hurting others. He gives them enough validation that they feel justified in maiming, killing, or otherwise harassing those who disagree with them. These people are wildly out of control and they are so loud. I think that a majority of Americans are good people who want peace and positive change, but none of those people seem to be doing anything. I imagine that like me, these people must be too overwhelmed or disheartened to get involved in politics right now. But therein lies the problem. The unstable, radical people who worship Donald Trump have decided that they want to be involved in the running of our country. Trump gave them a leg-up and they have taken their opportunity and no one is stopping them. On what planet is it acceptable for unstable, aggressive men to be allowed to parade around and through the capitol building with massive guns? Apparently ours. The bit that really makes my blood boil is that if these were people of color “protesting” in this way, they would be shot dead by law enforcement. Here we see racism at play - white supremacy, entitlement, and a total disregard for the safety of others. These people have always existed, have always held their poisoned beliefs, but Donald Trump has given them total permission to act in exactly the destructive, corrupt way they’ve always wanted to act. And the good people do nothing because they fear for their lives. If we take a moment to reflect on why people stormed the capitol with guns, we find further corruption, further ignorance and entitlement. These people want haircuts. These people demand haircuts, despite the risks that would accompany a rapid reopening of the economy. They either don’t believe that the coronavirus is anything more than a bad strain of flu (despite the fact that it shut down literally the entire world), or they believe that “saving the economy” is more important than saving lives. These people have literally compared our governor (who is doing an incredible job) to Adolf Hitler. By doing so, they imply that their situations are similar to what Jews faced during the Holocaust. This is beyond disgusting. Jews were forced from their homes and dragged to concentration camps where they were imprisoned in total squalor, their humanity stripped away. These people today are literally being asked to simply stay at home. Holocaust victims were killed without a thought if they were suspected of rebellion, if they were seen to be disrespectful, or for any reason a Nazi soldier came up with, and there was no justice for them. These people today are allowed to angrily march on the state capitol with massive guns, threatening violence if they can’t have what they want. Law enforcement apparently tolerates it when these people scream in their faces, despite the prominent risk of them spreading potentially deadly germs. Their situation is absolutely nothing like the Holocaust and Gretchen Whitmer is nothing like Adolf Hilter. In fact, ironically, expert historians as well as psychologists have likened Trump to Hitler a number of times. And just like with Hitler and his Nazis, Trump’s followers are utterly blind to the chaos and destruction he continues to cause. �12 Perhaps at this point it is fair to say though that our country was already in shambles before Trump came along. We were a forest of dying trees when he came along and dropped a match. I can’t continue to talk about all these things for very long or I begin to feel absolutely hopeless. But here is a bit of a list of the biggest problems that I see with our country. ● Absurd wealth gap - A vast majority of Americans are essentially poor while most of the country’s wealth is held in the hands of just a few people. ● Capitalist culture - People must work until they literally can’t anymore. Sick days are barely tolerated, mental health days aren’t even a thing. Pregnant moms often must keep working up until they deliver their child and get only a brief chunk of time for maternity leave. There is no paternity leave. All employees are expendable. ● Costs of education - Absolutely no one coming out of high school could possibly afford to attend college without substantial help from parents, scholarships and grants, loans, or other sources. Most full-time students I know have at least one job (I myself have two), which they will put directly back into their education come tuition-payment time. How can we be full-time, successful students while working copious hours at minimum wage jobs which barely earn us enough to live? ● Blind Racism - This needs no explanation, except the addendum that when slavery existed in the United States there was blatant, undisguised racism, and now though our culture still drips with the same toxicity, people have convinced themselves that it is no longer there. ● Profound Ignorance - I don’t know how else to say this…. People are just extremely dumb. I mean this very seriously, I am baffled on a daily basis by the alarming levels of stupidity I see from people. It is as if as a race we are losing the ability to think critically. People are walking through life blind and deaf to half of it. I can’t understand this and it is truly the most alarming thing to me because I think it is probably at the heart of many of our other issues. Because it’s not simply that people disagree on a topic, but rather that some of them literally cannot seem to see the opposition. The conclusions these people come to about the world and how it is or should be run are simply bizarre. It’s like they’ve read only every other chapter of a book and have pieced together a new reality for themselves. It is entirely baffling. To return to a positive note, the environment is thriving without humans mucking it up on a daily basis. I’ve been going outside for fresh air and sunshine nearly every day. I sit in my backyard and pet my cat, or I walk through this rolling green field that is enclosed by trees near my house. I play piano every day and for the first time in a while have started learning a new piece, Debussy’s Clair de Lune. I ordered a bullet journal starter-kit so I could explore this as a new hobby. It came with 10 fine-tip pens, 20 stencil sheets, 9 rolls of decorative tapes, and a bullet journal, and I absolutely love it. There is something extremely therapeutic about designing and creating a page here and there. I’ve also been doing yoga frequently, using the youtube channel called “yoga with adriene,” which has suddenly become extremely popular as more people stuck �13 in quarantine discover her! I’ve been doing her videos for 3 and a half years and I am excited that so many people are now jumping on board. Adriene Mishler is such a pure and authentic person, and at the moment she symbolizes to me all that is good about humanity. As a race, we need Adriene Mishler. I just hope her increasing popularity won’t ruin her life, like it seems to do with so many celebrities. Somehow though I have utter faith that she will never let it get to her. I cleaned out my childhood bedroom over the last couple weeks and rearranged it so that it better fits the person I am now. It makes me feel like I am being officially recognized as someone new. I am reading for the second time Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose, hoping it can help bring me clarity and peace during this time when so much feels so wrong. In this book, Tolle discusses the existence of the ego, which left unchecked can entirely take over a person so that they are ruled completely by compulsive emotion rather than logical thought… Highly relevant today. I have only been growing closer with my family, even though I was worried that the opposite would happen after we’d all been stuck together for so long. In these times, it is a relief and a blessing to know that I can rely on my parents, grandparents, older brother, and younger sister to become even more supportive, even more understanding, and even more compassionate towards their loved ones than ever before. I have been calling both my grandpa and grandma weekly, and also sent them each a letter with some questions in them. I asked them both what they would buy if they suddenly became billionaires. Funnily enough, they both wanted their own version of a cottage on a lake where they could sit and feel peaceful. I asked my grandma what she would ask or say to her parents if she was able to but have yet to get an answer from her! I asked my grandpa what he is most proud of in his life and he said without hesitation that he is most proud of having met his wife (who passed away when I was seven), having two children, six grandchildren, and one great grandchild. He told me family is the most important thing and I believed him. I am closer to him than I’ve ever been and am so thankful for him every day. Saturday, May 23, 2020 Governor Whitmer has gradually begun to reopen Michigan, so that now we are allowed to have gatherings of ten people or less. The mother of one of my long-time high school friends set up a surprise party for her last night and invited myself and four other girls from high school. This family who threw the party (I’ll call them the Smith family!) all had Covid-19 within the last month. They are over it at this point thankfully, but two of the girls didn’t come to the surprise party, one because she herself didn’t feel comfortable, and the other because her parents didn’t feel comfortable with her going. So the three of us who were okay with meeting up at the Smith’s house made sure to keep our distance from one another, sitting outside and only touching our own things, not making contact with each other. We knew that most likely none of us have been exposed to the virus, but all of us decided to err on the side of caution, considering �14 how many deaths there have been. [Just counting deaths for a moment, there have been 65 reported in my county alone, 5,158 in the state of Michigan, 97, 414 in the United States, and over 341,000 worldwide.] But the Smith family have always had their own ideas about things. Mr. Smith is a loyal Trump supporter, and therefore believes the severity of the Coronavirus is a sham. He believes that the numbers are only as high as they are because they are being falsely reported. He believes that things like wearing masks, and social distancing, and wiping things down with antibacterial wipes is unnecessary, and in this case, stupid. He said so himself to us last night. We jokingly took a picture of all of us with our arms out, standing apart from each other to show that we were social distancing, and Mr. Smith laughed and told us that in a few years we would all look back at that picture and realize how stupid we were being. We all looked at him with blank expressions and his daughter said, no I don’t think we’ll think it was stupid, before quickly changing the subject. I’ve known this family for over half my life and he is a good man. He is very religious and he is kind and generous, yet he firmly supports Donald Trump, who in my eyes represents everything wrong with our country. The Smith family are also anti-vaxxers, because they believe in the holistic healing process and natural medicine. I don’t know exactly what their arguments are against vaccines, but they are totally convinced that they are right and the rest of the world is wrong. They are so calmly confident in their convictions that vaccines are terrible and no one should get them. I have not ever been able to understand this point of view. The daughter, who has been my friend for years, blindly follows her parents when it comes to this, though she herself is not even remotely medically trained. At her surprise party last night, we had one of the girls who had stayed home on the phone. This girl was just getting over being sick, and we teased her for being sick much more often than the rest of us. She then laughed and mentioned a time when she got sick right after getting her flu shot. The Smith daughter heard this and immediately shot me a look as if this one instance was irrevocable proof that vaccines are bad. It could have been simply a facepalm moment, but instead I was furious. I was so angry at their entire family for having the audacity to call our caution stupid, to believe things without even understanding the science behind it, to discount all the evidence collected by scientists all over the world which shows undeniably that vaccines have helped keep extremely deadly diseases at bay. I think their reasoning is that we need to give our bodies the chance to build up immunity to these illnesses. But what about the thousands and thousands of human beings whose bodies are immunocompromised for one reason or another? What about the huge demographic of elderly people who are just trying to live out the rest of their lives peacefully? Or the children who can’t help but run and play and spread germs everywhere they go? Or the pregnant women who need to be as safe as possible? By the Smith family’s reasoning, we shouldn’t try and control deadly health threats like the coronavirus because we’ll be weakening people’s immune systems… But does that mean they’re totally fine with only half the population making it through? Survival of the fittest? Natural selection? I cannot understand how people can look and see all the evidence and still refuse to believe they might be wrong. Despite thousands of people dying prematurely, they still prefer to �15 believe it’s a hoax. I read a news story that said a covid-positive hair stylist went back to work and infected upwards of 20 people. Maybe most of those people will have mild symptoms and be completely fine, but then they will be carrying it and spreading it to all the places they go. Then anyone they come in contact with could get it and spread it, and it will just keep going, killing some, and travelling through others. What on Earth is so bad about wanting to be careful? I am not afraid of this virus. I make runs to the grocery store and the bank. I take walks with friends outside and have even visited my grandparents a couple of times. But I wear a mask, and I bring hand sanitizer with me everywhere, and I stand apart from people when I’m speaking to them. These things are not difficult to do and even though I don’t like wearing a face mask or avoiding public places, etc., I would rather do all that than risk being responsible for someone’s death. I still believe our governor has done well making important decisions for our state. She has been constantly discussing with other governors around the country and with public health professionals to determine how soon and how quickly we can reopen. I would rather be stuck at home than go about my normal life knowing that thousands of people are dying all around me and I’m doing nothing to help stop it, but in fact may be helping cause it. It is alarming how individualistic our culture has become. How selfish and privileged we are. It makes me sad because I was raised to believe that the United States was a wonderful place full of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. But it really isn’t that at all. Wednesday, June 3, 2020 A ton has happened in our world since I last wrote. As far as Corona goes, Governor Whitmer just lifted the stay-at-home order as well as other restrictions on Monday. More and more businesses are allowed to reopen and cases have been going down. They are apparently still worried about a second wave that would be even stronger than the first, but this issue isn’t even the focus anymore. Covid is the forefront in hardly anyone’s mind. Because on May 25th, George Floyd died. He was a black man suspected of forging checks, so he was apprehended by a group of (white) cops. There is video evidence that Floyd was complying with police orders, not resisting them at all. Yet they still threw him to the ground and pinned him there with their knees along his body. One of the officers, Derek Chauvin, placed his knee directly on Floyd’s neck while Floyd lay face down on the pavement. Two other officers were applying their body weight to Floyd’s back. They stayed this way for nearly 9 minutes, despite Floyd’s crying out that he couldn’t breathe. Eventually he passed out, and the officers remained with their body weights on Floyd’s back and neck for three more minutes, until Floyd’s heart stopped and he died. According to autopsy reports, Floyd did not die from strangulation, but the pressure applied on his back and neck were the cause of his heart going into cardiac arrest. Perhaps if the officers had acted to save him, he would have lived, but instead they remained on top of him until he was dead. �16 This insane act of cruelty - which is not uncommon in black communities - turned out to be a catalyst for nationwide and even worldwide outrage. There were riots the next day in Minneapolis, where Floyd was killed, in protest of police brutality. Businesses were broken into and looted and the city was trashed. Since then, protests and riots have continued in all fifty states, as well as in other countries as people everywhere have joined the Black Lives Matter Movement. This movement strives to bring attention to the injustices the black community faces daily just for the color of their skin. It brings attention to white privilege and educates the world about black history. It vehemently condemns police brutality and demands justice for those that have been treated unfairly, and especially those who have died for no reason other than that their skin was black. Many white people balk at this idea that racism still exists and that white privilege is so prevalent, but I believe it. I see it every single day when people of the white community stubbornly believe that if you just do what the cops tell you, you won’t get hurt. They continually believe that black people truly are just criminal and unruly. They continue to believe that black people do this to themselves, that black people are the only ones killing black people, that white people are innocent. They are ignorant. It is an extremely uncomfortable reality to have to accept, so many people don’t accept it. This is the point of the protests. Centuries of unacknowledged injustices without respite have finally given way to a movement fueled by anger and the condemnation of cops. I support this movement, though I do worry that, as happens with so many issues, we will first swing too far the other way. In other words, I am concerned that before we are able to find any kind of peace, there will be a massive and long-lasting hatred and mistrust of law enforcement, as well as the government and the media. When I scroll through Facebook I see countless different accounts and opinions about these issues. We cannot seem to find common ground on anything. I know I’ve been saying this in nearly all of my entries, but I honestly blame Donald Trump. He is behind the mobilization of the national guard to quell these protests, whose cause is righteous and which are most often completely peaceful. He is the one who has constantly condemned any and all news sources that do not agree with him. He is the one who has sown more hatred and division than nearly any other president in history. He is the absolute worst kind of person and seems to be trying to turn our democracy into a dictatorship. As far as I can tell, most people hate his guts like me. But Trump still has a hardy group of supporters who truly believe he can do no wrong. I have truly tried to understand these people, but all I can conclude is that they are just plain stupid. I plan to attend a silent sit-in today in the city of Grand Rapids, of which nearly 3,000 people have said they will participate. From 4-5 pm we have been directed by organizers to sit silently lining the sidewalks of Fulton street with signs that say “I’m still here. I’m still pissed.” We will not be blocking traffic at all, or causing noise pollution, or doing anything even remotely destructive. At 5 pm we are supposed to take a knee for 9 minutes and chant “I can’t breathe,” to represent George Floyd’s horrible experience. I was not originally planning on attending this for two reasons. First, despite the fact that no one is thinking about it, Covid-19 has not magically �17 disappeared, and I don’t want to contribute to spreading it more. Second, many groups who are separate from the groups of protesters have been coming to these organized peaceful protests with the sole purpose of causing trouble and discrediting the movement. I do not want to be at all involved in violence. I have decided to go because I think that this movement is more important than my reasons not to. The Grand Rapids chief of police has been in contact with the organizers of this sit-in and has actually agreed to participate in our protests against police brutality. I’m excited to go and see history in the making, and I hope desperately that this movement can bring about real change, both in America and in the world. Tuesday , June 9, 2020 Last Wednesday, nearly a week ago, I attended a protest in downtown Grand Rapids for the Black Lives Matter movement. I went to this one (and not the previous ones) because this was labelled as a peaceful sit-in, and was cleared with the Grand Rapids Police Department. The chief of the GR police also said beforehand that he would join in our protesting and take a knee for George Floyd and all the black lives that have been needlessly taken. Over three thousand people had responded that they were interested in attending this event on Facebook, and I would not be surprised to learn that they had all come. We lined the Fulton street single file (nearly everyone with a face mask on for Coronavirus) for what must have been miles and sat there - not blocking car or foot traffic, not being rowdy in any way - from 4-5 pm. Then from 5-5:09 we all knelt on one knee and chanted “I can’t breathe,” to relive the memory of George Floyd’s last experience on Earth. Following this we continued to sit peacefully until 5:30, which was when we were all supposed to go back home and clear the scene. This was a strict rule so that if any rioters did decide to show up and cause trouble, it would be very clear that they were a separate group from the peaceful protesters. Right before my friend and I headed back to the car, a chant erupted of “No Justice, No Peace,” among a large group of people who walked down the road, past all the protesters. During the hour and a half that we sat there, many cars drove up and down the street and at least half of them would honk their horns in support as they drove by, or reach a closed fist out the window, or give us some other kind of sign of encouragement. I am so glad I was a part of it. It was especially interesting to see what kinds of people turned out to support Black Lives Matter. I saw mostly people who were very near my own age, and quite a few more white people than black people. Yet I also noticed among the crowd middle aged people and even elderly people. It was excellent to know that this movement finds support among all demographics of people, throughout the country and even throughout the world. Though I was not near enough to the police station to know what was happening there, I later saw pictures of the police chief keeping his word and taking a knee with protestors at 5pm to chant “I can’t breathe.” As we were leaving, my friend and I had to walk a block over to the car and as we did so we noticed heavily armored police troops guarding the perimeter of the police station. There were no protesters in that area, and as far as I know, there never ended up being �18 any more destruction that night. But looking around me I could see all the destruction which had been done the previous weekend throughout the city. Many restaurant and shop windows had been smashed, and were boarded up when we walked through. This included the courthouse, which makes sense, but also many many small businesses that should not have been in the line of fire. The beautiful thing is that at this point, a small group of (african american) artists have been going through downtown and painting beautiful pictures of hope and peace on these boards. They are using art to change the boards from a symbol of past violence into a symbol of hope. Another major event that happened last week was Donald Trump’s disgusting use of force to clear the way through protestors for a photo-op. Washington D.C. was crowded with peaceful protestors calling for change, when Trump decided he wanted to walk to the small church there and pose in front of it with a bible. In order to reach the church, which was blocked by protesting citizens, he called in a force of police who reportedly fired tear gas into the crowds to force them to disperse. This in itself is absolutely disgusting. These were unarmed, peaceful protesters who happened to be protesting police brutality when our demented president saw fit to clear them and their very valid concerns away with a violent chemical, just so he could get a picture taken. This is far more disturbing when we consider that Trump does not even attend that church, which apparently nearly all American presidents have attended throughout history. He does not go to that church, nor any other church for Sunday mass. The bishop of the place was outraged to see that the president of the United States had used her church and a bible that he never reads simply to garner support for his reelection campaign. In a country that is plagued by a global pandemic and has given way to uprisings in every single state, the President uses excessive force to quell their outcries so that he can focus only on his popularity. If this story sounds ridiculous, that’s because it is the actual stupidest thing that I’ve ever seen, and not only stupid, but blatantly evil. Trump’s main supporters are people who blindly follow him without watching the news or educating themselves on any domestic or world issues. They seem to believe exclusively what Trump tells them to believe, so this disgusting and unnecessary show of power will probably appear to them as a good thing. His ill-won picture with someone else’s bible in front of a church that he doesn’t attend will probably make him appear to them as a very godly man who they should follow to the ends of the Earth. And the rest of the world laughs at us. Now there is a growing movement in the United States to defund and/or abolish the police altogether. This has understandably received mixed opinions. The first time I heard it from a friend I thought that was crazy. This friend simply told me that there was a movement to get rid of the police, and in my head I thought of all the true criminals in the world and thought that abolishing the police would be equivalent to allowing them to run free. There would be no one to call if someone broke into your home, no one to call if you were being followed down dark city streets, or if you’d been assaulted. I completely understand why every single person of color in the country would be all for this. Amazingly (bafflingly!) for a huge amount of black Americans, police have been one of the biggest threats to their health and safety. So where I (a young middle class white woman) see the police as a force for good who will protect me against evil, an �19 overwhelming number of others in the country are forced to see police as people who will harass them and threaten them for no good reason, and with no repercussions. And it goes without saying that they also must fear being unjustly murdered by the police on a daily basis. If I were a person of color, I would prefer anarchy to a police force. Since I am not a person of color, this most certainly was not my first reaction, and I still do not support the total eradication of any sort of police force. I have since learned however, that the idea is not to simply have nothing in place to protect people, but to have an entirely new system of public safety in which professionals in a variety of fields are called on to deal with problems that arise in a more individualized way. In other words, instead of sending strangers with guns to deal with every single problem ever, reformers want to be able to send out social workers, psychologists, behaviorists, etc. to help troubled people rather than simply arresting everybody and sending them to jail. The United States has the highest incarceration rate in the world. This is because our justice system is antiquated. Massive amounts of money are funneled into beefing up the police force so that they can continue to arrest everybody. Our prison systems are not to help rehabilitate convicts, but simply to put them in long timeouts. It doesn’t make any sense at all. This is why I support the abolish the police movement. Though I do think we need some semblance of the police to remain, I very strongly believe that sending a person to prison should not be the first solution. If a single mother steals from a grocery store because she does not earn enough to feed her children, she should be led to resources that could help her and her kids, not led to jail. If a high school student pulls a gun on classmates, he should be put in a rehabilitation center with professionals who can examine his mental state, not put in jail for the rest of his life to waste away. Certainly there will always be crime, but there would be far less if we funneled more money into programs to help people live a happy life. As soon as a person is deprived of their basic needs of food, water, and shelter, their fight-or-flight response will kick in and they will likely do something like steal or even kill others. If there was less crippling poverty, less unfair treatment by police, more attention from government officials, more prosperity and equality, there would be less crime. Let’s defund the police and reallocate that money away from weapons that will be used to hurt already damaged citizens and into programs that will help them heal. Let’s put that money toward funding public schools, which are struggling so much that they’ve begun to cut programs like art and gym class (which if you know a child are essential to helping them focus and absorb information). Let’s put that money toward buying more Personal Protective Equipment for the doctors and nurses across the country who have been helping to fight Covid-19 and putting themselves at risk this whole time. They have had to cover their clothes with trash bags and rewear masks (which renders them essentially pointless) because the government has not funded them well enough. This is disgraceful. Let’s put money toward getting homeless people off the streets and on their feet so that they have the option to reenter the workforce. Let’s put money into the foster care system so that parentless children don’t have to live through neglect and poverty only to be thrust into the “real world” on their 18th birthdays with no idea how to be a �20 productive adult. Let’s put money into bringing down the cost of college tuition so that education is available to all rather than just the middle and upper classes. We would have no need to beef up our police force if the country’s citizens weren’t treated so badly as to make them want to revolt. Donald Trump is like a really bad monarch and I can only hope that he will be overthrown this fall when we elect the next president. Thursday, June 11, 2020 Finally, after being home for months, I am beginning to feel like I can have a somewhat normal summer. I recently applied for a job at a ziplining adventure park near my house and have a virtual interview with them tomorrow. Thus far, I have only been earning minimal money at my Library job, which had to cut our hours when the pandemic hit. Luckily I haven’t been going anywhere or spending money on much of anything, so this hasn’t been a huge strain, but it will be once school starts and I have to start paying rent at my apartment! I am very excited to finally have the opportunity to begin making more money (in an environment different from my home!), and I feel ready to battle whatever struggles arise from reentering the service industry after so many weeks of people being cooped up. In addition to the scattered hours I’ve been able to work for the Library Virtual Services, I’ve also been teaching piano lessons several times a month to a couple of beginning students. One or two of them will continue through the summer, so that will be a tiny trickle of income for me as well. Every single penny counts! Though I have been stuck at home without much to do, I have tried to stay busy. I wrote up a list of all the things I have committed to this summer, which is as follows: ● French classes (one the first half of summer, one the second half), twice a week ● Piano lessons (2-3 times per week generally) ● Library virtual services shifts ● Band camp (A two week camp I help teach for my previous high school each summer. They only just got the official green light this past week to have it!) ● Family vacation (Likewise, we didn’t know if or when we would be able to have any vacation this summer, but it looks like we will be heading elsewhere at the end of July) ● Senior Project (Which I was unable to finish last semester due to the pandemic, and which is now due within the first month back to school this fall) ● Graduate schools research ● Clarinet Practice ● Yoga/daily exercise In addition to all of these things, my hobby is reading books. Despite its becoming more cheesy to me every time I read it, I reread the entire Twilight series a month or two ago. I love rereading books because it feels like visiting an old friend, or returning to a place from childhood! I’ve perused a couple different philosophy books and most recently charged through Roald Dahl’s Matilda. I am currently in the process of reading for the first time Jane Austen’s �21 Pride and Prejudice, which is absolutely phenomenal. I believe I mentioned in an earlier entry that I picked up ‘bullet journaling’ at the beginning of this quarantine, and have created several new designs that I am very proud of! I have loved being able to embrace all the creative pastimes that I don’t normally have time for during the school year, or when my week is full of work shifts. Because of this, part of me is sad to know that with this potential new job, my creative freedom and energy could come to an end. But I have no choice if I want to be able to pay for my apartment next year, as well as food, tuition, etc. Wednesday, June 17, 2020 I have always been someone who has used writing as an outlet for overwhelming emotions or ideas. These last couple months I have felt so many things that I haven’t even felt capable of writing them down. There is so much anger and hate in the world, as well as anguish and sorrow. So many incomprehensible horrors, things we have always read about in history books and never expected to encounter in real life. Even now as I sit here feeling on the edge of tears, I can’t think where to begin... I watched two videos recently of elderly men being violently pushed over by law enforcement, who were, both times, dressed head to toe in defensive armor. The first video I saw hit me so deep to the core that I felt physically nauseous and began to cry. In the video, a tall and thin elderly white man who was protesting with the black lives matter movement walked slowly up to a couple of police and began speaking to them and gesturing with his hands. He did not look in any way threatening, out of control, or even angry. In fact to me it looked like he may have been asking a question. Then, without warning, one of the officers shoved the old man forcefully backwards. He stumbled back several paces, waving his arms as he frantically tried to regain his footing, but his old legs couldn’t move fast enough and he tipped back. He crashed to the cement, the back of his head cracking on the ground and a pool of blood visibly forming around him. The officer who had stood next to the one who pushed the man began to lean down to check on him, but was immediately pulled away by the one who pushed. They walked past him and a group of more officers followed behind, all stepping over this elderly, bleeding man. The video went viral, and most people were equally terrified and appalled. I just recently saw an update on the man in my facebook news feed. His name is Martin Gugino, he is 75 years old, and now has a fractured skull and is unable to walk. This video circulated quickly and caused anguish in most who saw it. Most but not all, because our own president unfeelingly suggested that Gugino could be an ANTIFA provocateur, and faking the fall. This disgusting suggestion came after the knowledge that the police station had reported the incident by claiming that Gugino tripped and fell and that they had nothing to do with it. If it weren’t for the teenage girl who had been filming, none of us would know any different because an entire troop of cops were prepared to sell a blatant lie to the public to cover their own asses, at the devastating expense of their victim. �22 The second video I saw was fortunately less devastating, but still scarring in its own way. It showed another elderly white man, who was quite small and defenseless. He was simply standing on a sidewalk looking out toward the street when a group of cops came up behind him and started pushing him up the sidewalk. I truly don’t even know why or where they wanted him to move to. I cannot even describe the feeling of intense anguish for the man and hatred toward those awful cops that I felt when seeing this take place. The man jumped when he suddenly felt hands on him and tried to turn to see what was happening, but was not able to because they just kept pushing him further and further along. Like Gugino, this man quickly lost his balance and fell to the ground, though thankfully it was face first and he was able to absorb the fall with his arms instead of his head. These scenes awake some kind of animal instinct in me where I just want to rip and tear and I can’t imagine the otherworldly chaos I would be feeling had either of those men been my own grandfather or father. Here’s a bit of comic relief, which I will credit to the stupidity of our esteemed president. As I mentioned, he tried to claim that Martin Gugino (an innocent, previously unknown, peaceful protestor for BLM) was an ANTIFA provocateur. So I’ve had to learn recently what exactly ANTIFA is, because the way Trump talks about it makes it sound like an evil organization that exists to dismantle our government and destroy our country. He literally put forward a proposal to label ANTIFA as a terrorist organization. HOWEVER. IT’S NOT AN ORGANIZATION AT ALL AND ANTIFA IS SHORT FOR ANTI-FASCIST. So beyond the fact that Trump is putting forth blatant lies, he is also declaring himself against antifascism. Which, by extension, means that he has declared himself for fascism. Ha. Ha. He’s not even trying to hide the fact that he does every immoral thing in his power to be a dictator instead of a president with checks and balances. Probably because he believes his followers will follow him anywhere, even if it’s off a cliff. I hope that in the next few decades our democracy is restored and strengthened and history books will look back at this time as a low point that we must never repeat. Another point of grief on my mind today is that the Trump administration has apparently rewritten the Title IX rules, which is now thousands of pages long. Under the Obama administration, if someone came forward and accused another person of sexual assault, the accused could be considered guilty not with clear, obvious evidence, but with at least a 50% chance that it had happened. In other words, the old rules heavily favored the alleged victim in sexaul assault cases on college campuses, and subjected the accused to punishments such as being expelled from their university. At face value this may seem radical, but it was an aggressive measure put in place to help correct what had been a huge problem on college campuses for so long. Women have always been shamed for BEING RAPED. You don’t watch an innocent person get punched in the face and blame them for it because their face looked funny. You don’t hear that a woman was violated and blame her for dressing the wrong way. But people do. Because misogyny is so ingrained in our collective psyche that people aren’t even able to wrap their heads around the concept that a man who goes after a “provocatively dressed” woman actually just doesn’t have self control or respect for that woman. And other men protect rapists because they understand the feeling of being so tempted and wanting so badly to give in. �23 But not all men are racists, because some were raised right; some have learned self control and respect for others and some have integrity. Anyway, as a young woman who lives on a college campus for most of the year, the sight of a man walking toward me at night has the power to fill me with anxiety. I want to be able to know that were anything to happen to me, I could get the emotional support I need, and the man who assaulted me would face punishment. Trump’s new rules give universities the option to go back to the system that was used before Obama made changes, where punitive measures will only take place if there is evidence beyond a doubt that the accused committed the crime. In other words, Trump has changed the system back to heavily favoring the rapist. In the interest of creating an informed opinion, I must say that Obama’s rules resulted in a swing so far to the other side that girls were falsely accusing men that they didn’t like, who then were treated unfairly without further consideration into the matter. That occurrence is nearly as bad as a true rapist never facing consequences. So I agree that perhaps there needed to be more measures set up, but considering the history of this issue and the vulnerability of women, I personally feel that the rules should favor the victim rather than the accused. It doesn’t surprise me in the least that this new change came about under the Trump administration, as they have spent most of their time in office undoing everything that Obama did to help us. President Barack Obama began his presidency in 2008, when I was ten years old. I was young enough for most of his presidency that I wasn’t informed of most anything that he did. But my parents have told me that for them, having Obama in office was a welcome relief from the struggles that they’ve always faced in life. My family is situated firmly in the middle class, where we are generally very comfortable, but never waste money on frivolous things, and budget and save and sacrifice here and there so that we can stay comfortable. Many of Obama’s programs and laws went a long way toward making life easier for working-class families. As I said, I’m not familiar with his entire presidency, but I know that his Title-IX regulations made a big difference, as did Obamacare, and his treatment of immigrants. He did good things for the working class, and did his best to make the obscenely wealthy citizens of America pay more taxes for the good of all. (The wealth gap in this country is absurd, but that’s a qualm for another day.) Donald Trump these past four years has worked his way through undoing change after change after change made by Obama. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Anonymous COVID-19 Journal Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Anonymous Description An account of the resource Journal of an anonymous GVSU student's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-06-17 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-06-17_ANON-033 Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/c1a566a4f1a9fa033e407439b0654c0c.pdf 3d77cdd369399bc951053cf7cc7a022e Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-06-02_MarekHaley Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Marek, Haley Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-06-02 Title A name given to the resource Haley Marek Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of GVSU student Haley Marek's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/c818b35502666e439a328d3a28762000.pdf 1a429014b51287b3d0fd6dd242a117e9 PDF Text Text Dear March, we were not prepared. March 18: went to cousins house for dinner despite feeling uncertainty March 19: spent the day alone, cooked a lot of the food in my kitchen. Florence Pugh inspired me to cook and dance! Call your dad it's not that bad! March 21: facetime with annabelle March 25: still in the honeymoon stages, doing okay March 26: family zoom March 28: drinking a lot of coffee, mom working at greenhouse still (essential agriculture) dad working from home, constantly walking up and down the steps to get more coffee. Distracted by Dua Lipa's new album. April 1: April 2: morning yoga with annabelle and mom April 3: worked at metron, took a long nap after April 4: made more mango and tofu, watched ozarks, took food to brothers April 5: call to friend interrupted by neighbors, panicking over computer complications, finally finding comfort and inspiration on the couch April 6: made to do list for the week, overwhelming April 7: tried to do yoga while listening to class, tried to make breakfast while listening to class April 8: walk with Emily, so many worms on the track. Bernie announces dropping presidential bid. April 11: 3.3 mile walk around gr, nice nice day April 12: Easter, slow, clay earrings, painted computer case with no plan Memorial weekend was warm and it seems that everyone forgot about the virus. It doesn't seem real to many. Conspiracy theories flying through the air with the fireworks. May 27: it's warm! It's rainy! Breathing outside helps me think about the future that will happen. A couple weeks ago, around March 10, I remember a professor warning us about the possibility of online school. She said, “it's not a matter of if, but a matter of when.” She was spraying tables with Meyers cleaning spray, and saying we weren't going to pass around papers anymore. I was a little shocked and a little mad that she jumped the gun and scared us, doubting the possibility in my mind. Two days after, l am sitting in my apartment living room with my roommate discussing the buzz of all the colleges cancelling classes for the rest of the semester, just waiting for the email from Grand Valley. The paranoia came in weird stages the next couple of days. One of my roommates moved out the morning after we got the email from Grand Valley. My other roommate, Emily and I spent a lot of weird moments together in the apartment over the weekend. Anxious anticipation filled the moments we talked about how we would make money over the next couple of weeks. This semester has been extremely overwhelming and I was barely surviving. It was reliving in the moment seeing some of my responsibilities, being forcibly dropped. Emily �who worked for the telephone outreach program no longer had employment there and was considering going home to work at the deli. However this decision was not easy since she was also immunocompromised. A few mornings later when I came downstairs, Emily looked a little frazzled and quickly informed me that she would be going back to her parents’ house near Detroit because she woke up with a sore throat. (one of the known symptoms of COVID-19). I remember trying to seem calm and chill and said okay. As she packed up her stuff I sat in my bed trying to start some of my homework. When I’m nervous, my head feels very hot, often thinking I have a fever. I began to think what it would look like if I went to get tested. As the day went on she no longer felt like she had a sore throat and admitted to a bit of paranoia as well, but she still headed home at the request of her parents. My parents live ten minutes away so I spent some time there and some time back at my apartment. Mornings are either the best or the worst. Waking up is difficult when no class is telling me to be there. A good morning/ afternoon last week was spent sitting in the kitchen playing songs for my mom, making coffee, and connecting with my brother who lives far away. In the beginning I was determined to keep my class routine; watch the lectures at the right times and work ahead. As the weeks have loomed on I’ve started to feel behind and overwhelmed again. My self driven schedule fools me into thinking it's summer and I shouldn't have to spend every night doing homework. My parents want to spend time with me but the nightly news and my procrastination anxiety catching up pushes me away. Social media keeps suggesting what I should do with all my extra time but I seem to use up the hours so quickly. I then spend hours feeling guilty and anxious that I will look back on this time with so much negatively wasted time, when I could have done a lot in it. I spend about 75% of my time thinking this way and then I read an article, most fittingly titled, “Why You Should Ignore All That Coronavirus-Inspired Productivity Pressure” and feel slightly better about all the times I havent started my next great painting, clay earrings or even finished one book, or even as the bar lowers: LEARNED A TIK TOK DANCE. However, the articles push me to think positively, however crushing the uncertainty of the next couple of months might be. I have made a few spotify playlists, my dog and I are closer than ever, and I have started mixing pineapple and mango with tofu. April, praying for better The weird thing about all of this is that everyone is experiencing it at the same time. It's not a heartbreak that I am going through that my friends and parents can counsel me through. We are all trying to make up small, useful hopes to hold onto about our current situation. It could be worse, people tell us. And it could. This isn't awful when I really think about it. It's so much worse for other people. No one I know has tested positive for COVID-19. The nursing home that I work at has no residents who have any symptoms. I think the scariest part about the virus is its ability to hide. Its ability to take up residence undetected. �Impacting every host differently alerting some of their presence only after 14 days have passed After 14 days, having moved on to so many others. I called in 3 times before I went to work. I had a cough, which is not unusual for me. I feel feverish when I am extremely nervous about something, but the thermometer told me I was okay. After talking on the phone with my boss for half an hour she said I should be okay to come in. We all have times when we feel awful, everyone is walking around others not knowing if it's their sad time or their ok time. Right now we all collectively feel awful and there is inevitable doom and we want answers but all we have is the hope of “flattening the curve.” But nobody knows when things will go back to normal and if we will ever shake hands again. Living in the Ozarks till this is all over Humans of ny is the best page on ig: it makes everyone’s, sometimes awful stories- seem still so beautiful and human. �Looking through my notes app and found a random quote that says, “anytime we are in a desert we find out what is truly in our hearts” We have to be comfortable with ourselves. This quarantine is forcing us to spend copious amounts of time with ourselves. (edit May 27): You don’t have to take your pandemic self as your real self though. You don't have to accept that how you are dealing in this time is your true self. You are hopefully doing your best. It feels like the time when Carsen and I got separated at a music festival we were volunteering at and we all had to evacuate because there was massive flooding and it was going to ruin the field and there was lightning??? Anyways, Hoizer and Jack Antonoff were somewhere near us,,, paralleled to this celebrities are not immune to the virus Can you tell me what's real? Last night was the pink super moon! I ran outside at around 12:30 am to see and it was beautiful, the rare, warm breeze made it especially eerie. This morning when looking at pictures far superior to my own, I learned that it's not called a pink super moon because the date (April 8) correlates with the starting bloom of a wildflower in parts of Canada and the United States. This blue chair reminds me of bernie. �He dropped out of the presidential race today and it makes me feel hopeless. What a time to say goodbye to healthcare for all. A person who has ALWAYS fought for the under dog and for the general good. April 12 If you don’t think about it too hard, life is okay. We have adjusted. We find new things to fill our time. We are adaptable and we are surviving.I wonder how these new found habits will affect us in the future. I have done some things, made some things, and read some things. It still sucks, I don’t like being told what to do; being told to stay home and feeling like my breathing is constricted when I go to the store. I watched Saturday Night Live this morning. It was a weird mess. But it's cool to see them still trying to make it happen. �These pictures are from my walk yesterday (April 11). SO refreshing I need to do this everyday. I talked to my brother and sister in law today and she said her family friend died from coronavirus. The closest ties I've had to a death caused by the virus. The nightly news that my parents watch is filled with sad stories from nurses in Boston and New York. Stories about moms saying they haven't hugged their children in weeks, or living in hotels so that they don't expose their family to the germs they are exposed to. I work a few hours a week at a nursing home with no cases still, wearing the mask is exhausting and hot. You are breathing in your own air and I find the stress of it all always causes my throat to feel a little sore after. I can’t imagine how these healthcare workers feel after 8-12 hour shifts. I can’t imagine the celebrations that will take place when this is all over. My roommate got into nursing school and celebrated her birthday since I’ve seen her last. Maybe NYC: How the city has changed from my window From crowded streets, to now only sparse beats Time passing nonetheless All the happenings, happening inside no longer under the sun, under street lights From a city of life and flesh To dry bone People and parties and countries divided on what is my freedom, what is her freedom, how should he protest the best, and will you act in a way that is better for your larger community? What does that look like? �Suddenly everyone is forced to take an opinion on how their governor is handling the shutdowns. Everyone must care about politics now because it now directly affects them. Whereas before, many of us could say, “I'm not into politics.” We had the privilege of not caring about the policies because we knew we wouldn't be the ones under the knee of police brutality. May 27, 2020 I have been absent from this journaling. But i've thought about it often- the activation energy in journaling is just too much sometimes. Whenever I get over the, more realistically, small hump of opening the doc. I have no regrets. I think I have a hard time processing shocking things in the moment. Even still- this whole thing doesn't seem real. And yet I am amazed at the resiliency of people. Then again I am seeing a small representation of people still doing and progressing. The ones struggling with mental illness are not the ones being highlighted and having their voice being heard. �About a month ago we found out my mom’s cousin and her husband tested positive for Covid19. They were fine, in their homes with manageable symptoms. Last week we found out that during this recovery she had a stroke- related to Covid. Her husband was not allowed in the hospital as she lay in a bed in the ICU for a few days and later on a Covid floor. It was a sobering reminder that no one is completely immune. They are in their mid 40s, pretty healthy. People provide blanket statements of hope- for the most part the young and healthy have not been too greatly impacted by the virus. Neighbors have gotten close, even strangers, forgetting about the virus that just a few months ago had me washing my hands at the top of the hour, (or more). It is no less dangerous than then. But- now it doesn't seem real. �Today, especially, the thought of spreading the virus is absent when fires are in the streets of where we stood a few hours ago. When “I can’t breathe” is not in reference to the rampant virus but the last plea to a police officer’s knee. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-05-30_ANON_032 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Anonymous Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-05-30 Title A name given to the resource Anonymous COVID-19 Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of an anonymous GVSU student's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/fff728a48a1e7b6ba12fd7e9dc0a17a0.pdf a0c536a3974cf4fc66f9760911c2a934 PDF Text Text Jenna Sobaski On March 12th, 2020, I was on my way to a talk that was being hosted by my WRT 430 professor Oindrila Mukherjee. It was an opportunity to have a skype call with Aatish Taseer, a writer and journalist who had been published in Time, Vanity Fair, and The New York Times. His career greatly interested me as it is exactly something I would like to do once I am done at Grand Valley. I was on the phone with my mom as I walked to the building. I had wanted to update her on the situation. One of my professors had warned us that it was only a matter of when the school will close because of the coronavirus, not if. I had just reached the door of the classroom the skype session would be held in when I got the email stating that classes would be moved to online until at least March 29th. The skype session took my mind off of it, but it ended quickly. I ended up calling my mom again to further update her. I was kinda scared. It’s really strange when school gets canceled for something that is not weather-related. Yes, I am a twenty-two year old woman, but it never hurts to call my mom when I am unsure of something. I was very stressed about the uncertainty of everything, so I decided going back to my hometown for a bit would be nice (at the time, I had no idea I would end up being quarantined there for more than a month). I was supposed to report to my job at nine the next morning, but classes were canceled. Normally when classes are canceled I am not supposed to come to work. I emailed my boss quickly, asking what I should do. He had emailed me previously (a little before the university shut down) to see if I had a way to do some work remotely, which I do have. So I wondered what he would need me to do to be able to work from home. I blame my mom for telling me to sleep in (not really, as I stated earlier. I am an adult. I need to take responsibility for my choices.), but I ended up waking up at eleven in the morning to an email from my boss asking me to come in as soon as I could. I arrived flustered as heck, which I think he found funny. I received a flash drive with a few files for me to work on while the university was closed. I finished up some in person work that needed to be finished. The office was generally calm. This was the complete opposite of how I was feeling. After work adrenaline really kicked in. I clean when I am stressed. So I cleaned up my room at my off-campus apartment, and spent the majority of the day packing up some things to go leave (again, I was only expecting to be there for a week or so). I also tend to drastically change my hair during stressful points in my life as a means to gain some semblance of control. So, I put my hair in two pigtails and hacked away. I went from mid length hair to a bob! I’d always wanted to see how I looked though, and it ended up looking really cute. I decided to leave after my therapist appointment on Friday the 13th. This appointment actually ended up being virtual. This worked out great for me, as I normally have a thirty minute commute (and the appointment was at nine thirty in the morning). I was able to sleep in. But I had hardly slept anyway. As soon as it was done I loaded up my many, many, houseplants into my ford escape, named Dean and started my hour and twenty minute drive to my hometown. It felt like I was in an apocalypse movie as I drove the empty highway in the dark. I listened to a lot of Robyn to make myself feel better. �***** The minute I came home, I deeply regretted not bringing my bulletin board that I had decorated, as my childhood bedroom really does not reflect my current style. But still I made do. April 6th I really wish people would follow social isolation. My sister and I went for a drive last thursday (April 2nd) and she saw a few people she knew who were breaking quarantine. My sister and I only took a drive to watch the sunset. We live very near the coast of Lake Michigan, and had no intention of even leaving our cars. I had not left the house since March 14th, I was going for a drive, damn it. It frustrates me though, to see crowds of people out and about and people who do not live together hanging out. My parents are both in their sixties, and my father has been battling cancer for over five years, with a preexisting lung condition as well. They are both extremely at risk for this virus, and I’ll be furious if they get sick (or even die) because someone did not want to stay home and follow social distancing. ***** My parents, unfortunately, seem to have the news playing nonstop on the family room TV. I understand that being informed is important, but I also disagree with their choice of news outlet. ***** A personal plus to this quarantine is I have been able to spend more time writing and creating. That has been refreshing. Otherwise my days are filled with work, homework, taking my dog for walks, and chores. A while back I got the email that Grand Valley would be moving to online for the rest of the semester. This was partially my decision to drop two of my four classes. I was just not learning well online in my document design class, and my other class was belly dancing, which is very hard to do online. I decided to retake these classes the following year to really get the full experience I had wanted. I am glad that the university made the decision to be remote, because the only way to get through this is to slow the spread and stay home. ***** My family and I have been playing a lot of games and watching movies together. It's been nice to spend a little more time with them. I don’t even spend this much time with them while I am on break from school. I am fortunate. I know a lot of people are a lot worse off. April 8th Mom asked me to help her plant peas and spinach today. This is the first time I’ve seen a garden in our back yard since I was a child. My birthday was a few days ago. It was definitely a quiet birthday, but it was lovely. My mom made a cake, and I got the self inflating sleeping pad that I’ve really wanted for my camping trips. All my friends mentioned that they were sorry we couldn’t celebrate together. I’m hopeful that soon I can see them again. �I don’t know if I’d said it before but I will say it again. It is so easy to forget what is going on in the world here. There are so few houses on my road. Even my dad mentioned that it's like living in a bubble out here while we were taking our dogs for a walk. Except he now keeps a gun near by, in case of what, I’m not sure. I unfriended someone on facebook because he was ranting about not being able to go to a movie or to a restaurant. I felt he was being an ass because, you know, people have it way, way, worse. I just did not want to see that today. Social media helps me remember what’s going on in the “outside world” as my mom keeps referring to it as. That, and my parents' habit of keeping the news playing constantly. My mom has now taken to Youtube to watch song parodies about the corona situation. It drives me crazy. I hate it. I saw on Facebook that a lot of students in this situation are really struggling at being productive and getting anything done. They just can’t focus when everything feels like the end of the world, and a few of them seem to have professors that aren’t as understanding as mine have been. I don’t have this problem, but maybe the opposite. I am doing a lot but there just is not enough time in the day to do what I need. A family friend of ours works as a nurse in the next county over. Two of her coworkers have the virus. The friend herself is asmatic. I can tell my parents are worried. My mom is also really worried about her brother (my uncle/my godfather). She's worried he isn’t taking good care of himself during this time. It’s his birthday tomorrow. Something that helps make me feel better is taking care of my plants. I have at least fifty, which doesn’t look like as much as it sounds, I promise. The one I named Desdemona has finally produced flowers again in nearly a year, and my bird of paradise is sprouting a new leaf. Normally when I move my plants they get stressed and get really sick or die, but right now that isn’t happening and that makes me really happy. ***** A week ago I got glass in my foot. My dad spent a good twenty minutes trying to dig it out, followed by a dose of rubbing alcohol. My parents are terrified of being near hospitals because of the possibilities of getting the virus there. Thankfully my foot is fine. ***** I’m surprised that my depression has just now decided to show up. April 9th I see a lot of people quarantined with their significant others. I wonder what that would be like. I still have my old skateboard that I got in middle school and decided I should try to learn how to ride it because I never did. Today was out of the ordinary. My mom made us all go into town with her while she ran errands so we could visit my uncle for his birthday. We stood outside his house with a “happy Birthday” sign and sang to him. It was awkward but I could tell he enjoyed it and that made me happy. Then my mom tripped and fell on the grass while trying to give my uncle the mail from his mailbox. The neighbor peaked out her door and just watched that. It was quite the tumble and was hilarious after we saw she was okay. �I am definitely starting to miss my independence. I don’t regret coming here though. My mom always said that times of emergency are when you want to be surrounded by those who would support you, and support me my family does a lot. It has just become very apparent that I have changed a lot since leaving for college four years ago. My mom likes to make sure I’m being productive with my time here, and I have to remind her that I am twenty three, and I’ve been managing my time very well for a long time. I’m bummed that I can’t go get take out or drive-through food. My family and I have decided that it's for the best (because of my dad and both my parents being over sixty) if we just make our own food. And I agree. When this is all over I’m going to go have the best day at McDonalds. I mentioned earlier that this was a much needed break. One of the only real good things about this is that for a long time I was thinking of taking a semester off for a break. Now I really don’t feel the need to. I feel that this quarantine has really given me a new appreciation for life as I knew it. Also, we got an emergency alert on our phones today that the stay at home order was extended to April 30th. I will have to leave before May 4th to move my things out of my apartment. I still don’t know what my living situation is going to be like for summer and the school year. The laker store hasn’t posted textbooks for the spring semester classes, which I get why. April 10th I am definitely starting to feel more irritable as a result of this quarantine. I only keep in touch with one or two of my friends right now, which is fine. Yeah, I’m really just feeling icky today. Icky on the inside. So much is just messed up in the world, and people are in so much pain. I am still being creative and productive today despite my internal feelings of irritability. Today is just one of those days where I am excited to just get everything done that I need to get done and go to bed. Maybe I’ll work in my sketchbook some more. That always makes me feel better. My greatest form of self-care is creation. I’ll draw things from my dreams, recreate art I found on youtube(that was first found on Tik Tok). I used to just paint rocks and leave them around for people to find, but I can't do that anymore. I redownloaded Bumble as a way to just talk to other people, but quickly deleted it. I’m just not interested in dating right now and probably won’t be for a while. I started working out regularly again. Nothing insane, but I go for a nice long run on our family’s elliptical. I can’t wait for gyms to open again so I can start doing good weight training. I might have to start wearing my glasses soon. My eye doctor may not be refilling contacts right now. That will really bother me. I don’t like wearing glasses at all. And my friend Zachary said that my glasses make me look like the pizza guy from Booksmart. That doesn’t bother me as much as I hate not having a full range of vision. There are flowers starting to bloom around despite it being so cold. I’ve pressed a few to add to my sketchbook. Maybe my sketchbook is turning into an art journal now. The stove is so full of old food it's burning that the house is full of smoke. I wonder if people will look back on this and read it like those My America diary books I read as a kid. �May 5th Things have been busy for me lately. I had to finish up my winter semester, and had a load of papers to write. A small bit of tension is running in my family due to us being around each other so much but overall it is not bad. I got my mom to buzz my hair into an undercut. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do and right now seems to be a great time to do it since no one will see me. My head feels so much cooler too. I had to move out of my allendale apartment. It really wasn't so bad and took maybe a total of five hours to pack everything up and put it in the cars. I'm sad to have lost a place to live there, but I signed a new lease for august once the school year starts. My friends and I have been doing weekly video calls where we can catch up and play games. It's been nice to reconnect. I’m getting really antsy to travel again, so I’ve taken to making a vision board of places I have been and places I want to go. It has been very therapeutic for me. It keeps me positive to focus on fun things like that. My mom also had me cut her hair. My dad thought it was hilarious and kept taking pictures. She thought I was taking too much off but once she saw what I did she liked it. I am very fortunate to be where I am. This quarantine has turned more into a nice break. We are so far removed from the world out here. The stay at home order has been extended to May fifteenth. May 6th I learned the skill of embroidery. We are going to the nearby state park today. I will report back on how that went. I have made travel plans for when quarantine is over. My sanity is based totally on if these travel plans will happen. I definitely will adhere to social distancing for as long as medical professionals tell us to. I am just hoping the world is back to normal soon so these travels will happen. May 10th We took a very long walk in our state park. It’s a beautiful trail. I collected so many shells. I was surprised at how many people were on that trail. There were many large groups of people too. My sister saw some people she knew that were not following social distancing. I’ve taken to bringing my dogs out onto the porch to drink my coffee with me in the mornings. It’s been a nice time to sit and watch the nature in my backyard and to be away from my phone. I’m so removed from the chaos. I feel I should speak on the protests in Lansing, but I’m not sure I am ready yet. My contacts came in the mail. We saw the palest deer that we have ever seen. It was almost white. Mother’s day went well. We made dinner for my mom instead of taking her out. I started an herb garden in some old jars. I’m excited for them to grow. �The summer classes I’m taking are going well. I can tell I am at risk of being overwhelmed if I don't work hard. May 20th I have become a coffee drinker again. I am drinking more coffee in a day than I ever have. I think it's because I stay up late, only to take melatonin to fall asleep, only to need to wake up early, thus needing coffee. May 21st My parents went to the store this morning. At six in the morning. My mom says shopping used to be fun but now it's too stressful. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-05-21_SobaskiJenna Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Sobaski, Jenna Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-05-21 Title A name given to the resource Jenna Sobaski Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of GVSU student Jenna Sobaski's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/db2f431d7eae8767780b6cc791592fd4.pdf 342433cb44526c939dd9042f08ddbb64 PDF Text Text On Wednesday night March 11th 2020, I received an email from Grand Valley State University (GVSU) that classes were cancelled for the rest of the week and would move online from March 16th to March 29th. Many emails came to follow this one detailing all of the changes that were to come-- my shifts at work had been cancelled until further notice and that I was expected to move out of my on-campus apartment unless there were extenuating circumstances. It almost did not feel real. I desperately did not want to leave GV and all of my friends and community, especially because I had a feeling we would be doing class online longer than stated. I spent many hours trying to figure out a way to stay in Allendale. I thought of people I could ask to stay with or reasons as to why I had to stay on campus. However, I knew the best thing for me to do was go home. I spent the next few days being with friends and starting to pack up. I decided to not pack up everything in the hope that I would be returning to my apartment to finish classes inperson. I knew I needed to turn to God with my emotions. I journaled my prayers to Him; my sadness, my anger, my confusion. My prayers for health and safety for everyone. I said goodbye to my roommates and left that Saturday to go home, which was bittersweet. I love being with my family, but I couldn’t hide the fact that I would rather be at school. That following Tuesday, March 17th, I received another email stating that classes would be online for the remainder of the semester and I should schedule a day to completely move out. However as of April 11th, that has not happened due to the governor’s “Stay Home, Stay Safe Order” and most of my stuff is still at school. Upon hearing the official news that I would not be returning to GV, the wave of emotions hit me once again. I lamented my lost time with friends, no longer getting to live with my roommates, and the loss of future plans. I felt negative and a little hopeless. I prayed to God to ask Him for a heart attitude change and to not find joy in my circumstances, but in Christ alone. The beginning of all this change was the hardest. Like I said before, I was processing a lot of emotions and they definitely weighed heavier on me in the beginning. I also am the type of person who thrives on a schedule, so since my routine was thrown out the window I found it much more difficult to get done what I needed to get done. Additionally, the first week of doing class online was exhausting. I was now on my computer for a significantly longer amount of time than before. There were also a lot more distractions while I was trying to listen to my professors. I am normally a handwritten notes kind of girl, which means my laptop is away during lectures. Now, any and all notifications pop up while I’m “in class.” Like many others, my motivation to do my homework dwindled. My younger sister and brother did not have any work to be doing, which made it that much harder to concentrate on mine. I also wanted to spend the evenings �with my family. If I was back at school I would normally do homework in the evenings, but now that I am home I find it much more difficult to motivate myself to do work after dinner. Even though I much prefer in-person classes, I have been able to better adjust to online class and all that comes with it. April 12, 2020 Easter looked very different this year. Normally, we wake up and get ready for church. It’s a big celebration service where we praise the Lord for the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead. The church is always filled to the brim with people. However, this year the chairs in the auditorium of the church sat empty while the band played songs of worship and the pastor live streamed his sermon. At home, my family decided to get dressed up as we watched the service on Facebook live. Since the coronavirus, we’ve spent the past few Sundays in our pajamas while watching the service, but somehow it just didn’t seem right to be in pjs for the Easter service. Even though Easter looked a little different this year, the heart of it was the same. We still praised God for all He has done. We still sang songs, they were just from our living room. We still drank our coffee while taking notes on the message, but we were just on the couch instead of in the church. That’s the beautiful thing about God, He sees us and hears us no matter where we are. Yes, Easter looked different this year, but Jesus Christ still rose from the grave. He still died on the cross for our sin so that we could have a relationship with Him. That’s what Easter is about. It’s not about the clothes we wear to church. It’s not about the ham we eat for lunch. It’s not even about the extended family get-togethers. We still had the opportunity to celebrate Jesus, which remains the same even among the chaos of this pandemic. Usually, I would get to see all of my extended family as we spent the remainder of the day together eating, laughing, and playing card games. This year I did not get to see my little cousins, or my aunts and uncles, or my grandparents. Although this was disappointing, I am still thankful that I was able to be with my parents and siblings during this time. My mom made a wonderful Easter lunch of ham, mashed potatoes, and candied carrots. In addition, she made a chocolate cake that was extremely delicious. In the evening, we started to watch a free movie on Amazon Prime, but soon realized that it was a terrible movie. It was so bad that we could not even finish it. Instead, we watched Sweet Home Alabama, which is what the other movie tried and failed to be. Despite the unusualness of Easter this year, I still had a wonderful day with many blessings to be grateful for. �April 14, 2020 On most days I try to get up earlier so that I’m able to get most of my work done during the day. I started off the day reading my Bible and praying before breakfast and coffee. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I have four classes normally, although not all of them meet synchronously. Doing classes online is strange because I feel like I’m working all the time while also not getting much done. Today I focused on a couple of projects for some of my classes, watching a recorded lecture, attending class, and other assignments. I definitely put in several hours of work, yet I feel that I accomplished little, which is quite frustrating. This week my little brother and sister started up online school for the first time. During the past month I’ve been working hard and having somewhat of a routine while they have not had any official responsibilities and have had more freedom during the quarantine time. My sister is a junior in high school and felt especially stressed today as she is in the process of adjusting to this new way of doing school. Since my brother is only in eighth grade, he does not quite have the workload that she does. Although who knows what he is actually supposed to be doing because he is a middle school boy. I’ve honestly started drinking more coffee during this period of staying at home then when I actually had to get up early and go to class, which is quite strange. I drink coffee almost every morning and then again almost every afternoon. To be quite honest, sometimes afternoon coffee time is the only thing I look forward to during the day. The thought of my afternoon iced coffee motivates me to get work done so I can enjoy a small break while sipping my coffee and perhaps enjoying a little treat. We always eat dinner together as a family, which I love and helps establish a feeling of normalcy during the time of chaos. One thing I’ve come to appreciate since going away to college is having my mom make dinner for my family each night. She is a wonderful cook and I’ve found that it is quite exhausting to plan, shop for ingredients, and then make meals for myself. After a long day of classes and then a night full of extracurriculars, making a healthy dinner can be such a hassle. On Tuesday nights I co-lead a small group for Delight, which is a nationwide women’s ministry and we happen to have a chapter at GVSU. Our club has really expanded this past year, which we are so thankful to God for. This semester we are going through the book of John, and I’ve really enjoyed talking about the Bible with all my girls. We took a couple weeks off of meeting so that everyone could adjust to going back home and doing classes online. At first, I wondered if there even was a point in trying to meet anymore, but I am so glad that we as a leadership team decided to keep going. We meet with our small groups over zoom. My co- �leader and I try to talk a little bit before our small group so that we have a general idea of what we want to do with our time. We start out by everyone talking about how they are doing and how their week is going. Then we pray before we dive into that week’s scripture and devotional. There are discussion questions that we sometimes follow, but lately we’ve just been discussing which verses stuck out to us. Tonight was John 20, which covers the resurrection of Jesus. It was so perfect since this past Sunday was Easter! We had a really good conversation tonight and I am so thankful for the opportunity to continue to meet digitally and to connect over God’s word. Normally, our club meets for an hour but our zoom calls usually are closer to an hour and a half because we have such a good time talking with each other. To close, we ask how we can be praying for each other and then we close in prayer. April 16, 2020 Today was my last day of classes for the semester! I never would have imagined that this is what the end of the semester would have looked like for me. Thursdays are my busiest days. I have four classes and then two meetings in the evenings, which I’ve pretty much kept up since coming home. My mom looked at me and said she could not believe the schedule that I kept at school, but I guess that’s college. Today was not any different. I was working on assignments and attending lectures for all of my classes today. It was a full and busy day. My first class period is a time where students can go in to ask my professor questions about our project and final. I attended speech science today because I had questions for my report, but I don’t always attend because it is optional. Then I worked on my project for speech science for the remainder of the hour. My next class was a review and again a time to ask my professor questions for our final. We had made virtual children’s books based on a concept we learned about the neurology of speech and hearing. My group shared our book, which was about the brainstem and I really enjoyed listening to other groups share their books. Then I watched a recorded lecture for aural rehabilitation and took notes. Finally, I worked on some exercises for french grammar, took a quiz, and then attended my last class. I did not get any time to rest though because I was working on things up until my first meeting, which was our last delight leadership meeting. Again, we used zoom for the meeting. We had a couple of business items to attend to, but mostly we talked about what a wonderful year we had together. Everyone went around and shared some of their favorite memories from this past year. The hour was filled with a lot of laughter. Many of us are not doing leadership again next year, so I felt a little sad that it was all ending and we couldn’t even be in person. Unfortunately, I had to leave quickly so I could eat dinner and get ready for my next meeting. �My second meeting on Thursdays is Life Group. I co-lead a small group through Campus Ministry. Normally, we meet for two hours spending an hour on talking and hanging out, and the other hour going over the scripture and message from the Well the past Sunday. That’s changed a little since going virtual. Instead, we mainly talk for an hour to see how everyone is doing and see how we can be praying for each other. Honestly, my co-leader and I have not had a lot of girls show up for our virtual meetings, which was a little discouraging at first. But I had to remind myself to give everyone grace since we are going through an unprecedented time. We were excited because we had two girls show up tonight and it was good to talk, catch up, laugh, and pray with them. I finished both meetings with my heart very full despite the stress I had been feeling from school. Hard to believe my busy Thursdays are over! April 17, 2020 Well it’s that time of year again, the end of the semester crunch to finish up papers, projects, and studying for finals. The rush to get everything done so that we can enjoy a welldeserved break. It’s strange to look back and realize that it’s been over a month since I got sent home from GVSU. Normally, this is around the time I would be packing up stuff to head home, but I’ve already been home for five weeks and most of my stuff is still at school. The past couple days have been full of anxious thoughts and a bit of mental spiraling. I care a lot about my grades so I hold myself to a high standard and put a lot of pressure on myself to do things “perfectly.” So as I’ve had to juggle the influx of assignments that comes with the end of the semester, I’ve found that my stress levels have skyrocketed. Additionally, the fact that I’m already home makes it difficult to keep up the motivation and attention necessary for finals. However, I’m doing the best I can given the circumstances and I have to remind myself that my best is all I can do. And today that looked like sitting in the same spot for five hours to finish a rough draft due tonight. Thankfully, I was able to finish that at a reasonable time and could enjoy my evening. Fridays are always pizza and movie night at my house. This has not changed since the coronavirus because we are still able to enjoy these things while quarantined. Over the past few weeks we’ve been rewatching different series. We started with the Hunger Games and then the Chronicles of Narnia. Tonight we started the James Bond series starring Daniel Craig. It’s nice to have some stability and sameness in a time where so many things have changed. April 18, 2020 �I allowed myself to rest today as I have felt that I’ve been working non-stop these past few days. I slept in a couple hours past the time I would normally get up. Then I read my Bible while enjoying breakfast and coffee. I’ve felt pretty lethargic after sitting all day doing school and homework the past couple days. I decided that I needed to move so my mom, sister, and I all did a workout video. Once we’d finished I noticed that it was a beautiful day outside. The snow had melted from the day before, and the sun was shining. I threw on a sweatshirt and went for a walk. I listened to some worship music and spent some time praying. There is something so restful about a walk outside on a beautiful day. The fresh air is refreshing and it’s one of the few times that I can be alone during the stay home order. After that I did have to get some work done. So I worked on a couple assignments and organized what I needed to get done in the next week. I love organizing my planner and I love making lists. It makes me feel accomplished and helps clear my head. Yet lists are deceptive, in the fact that I feel more productive than I actually have been. After this, my sister and I painted a sign for one of our friend’s birthdays. His parents had arranged a car parade that many are doing during this time of social distancing. And so cars were lined up down his street with happy birthday signs and balloons. Then all the cars drove by his house while honking their horns to wish him a happy birthday, and we circled around his house twice. I had texted him earlier in the day, and I don’t think he suspected that this was happening, so I truly believe he was surprised. He texted me after that it made his day and how much he missed being with everyone. It was nice to still be able to celebrate a friend during this time even if I couldn’t physically be there to celebrate with him. �April 20, 2020 Well finals week is finally here. It’s hard to believe that it is the last week of school. I’m looking forward to having a lot more free time and downtime to do what I would like. On the other hand, it will be weird to not have a purpose and to be trapped at home. Normally during the summer I would have a job, but I am not sure that will happen. There is so much that is uncertain about the future. What’s more is that I can’t be with friends during this time either. No fun excursions to coffee shops, no picnics, no going to the beach, no road trips, and no going out to lunch. These are things I normally look forward to with the end of school, but with the stay home order that's not possible. I’m still trying to stay on schedule this week by waking up early so that I’m able to finish everything I need to get done. So this morning I woke up, read my Bible, wrote in my prayer journal and then ate breakfast. Next I worked on a reflection assignment for my french class, which took a lot longer than expected. My mom, sister, and I all decided to work out so after my mom’s meeting, we did an exercise video and it felt good to move. After that I continued to study until my final conversation for french. Since it’s a conversation class, a written final would not make any sense so everyone had to schedule a meeting on zoom so she could assess how our conversational skills have progressed. It was the shortest final I’ve ever had to take. After that it was more studying and getting ready for other exams. However I did allow myself some relaxation in the evening as my whole family watched a couple tv shows together. I figured it was a well deserved break. April 21, 2020 Today I had my first official final. To be quite honest, since we were allowed to use our notes, I did not study for this exam. I have some that are not open-note so I’ve been spending my time preparing for those exams instead. This happened to pay off for me because I got a good grade and my grade overall is right where I’d like it to be for this class. The rest of my day was spent studying for my other exams, talking to my professor about my research project, and talking to people over zoom. My group of life group leaders met for an hour today to catch up and see how everyone was doing. It was our last official meeting, however I know that we will continue to keep in touch. We spent some time praying together as we head towards the end of our semester and into summer break which is filled with uncertainty. I love these girls a lot and I am so thankful for them. Tonight was the last delight bible study for the semester. I know it won’t be the last time I see these girls though because we are going to do a summer study on James together. I can’t �wait! Like usual we talked about how we are doing--the ups, the downs, and life in general. Then we dove into John 21, the last chapter in John!! One of the girls pointed out that there is a reflection page to highlight how you’ve grown and the ways you’ve come to know Jesus better. I think that it is so cool and I did not realize that it was there. I’m looking forward to filling it out myself. I am so incredibly thankful for these girls and I love them lots. April 22, 2020 I once again started my day with reading my Bible and then exercising. I really enjoy starting the day that way since I get to grow spiritually, and then work physically. I did not have any exams today, so a few of my friends decided to study for our exam together. This is the one exam I had to study for because we were using a lockdown browser while being recorded so that our professor could make sure no one was cheating. We spent most of the day going over practice exercises and questions. This took a surprisingly long time to go through and then try to answer each other’s questions. We all knew this was going to be our hardest final and wanted to prepare as much as we could for it. I thought it was very helpful and glad we spent time working on them together. After we finished that, I looked over some of my notes for that same class. I also prepared for my other final, which was open note, by bookmarking my notes so I could easily find any information I needed during the test. I was not quite sure what to expect for this exam, but I did my best to get ready for it. Since I had worked so hard studying the whole day I let myself rest in the evening. I am a big proponent of balance in school. I care a lot about my grades and how well I do, but I think rest and relaxation is vital in performing well academically. April 23, 2020 Today was my big day! I had three exams to complete. The first one was at 8am and required that I set up the lockdown browser. So I made sure that I was up early enough to complete all the steps for set-up while still optimizing my sleep. I woke up with a sore throat so I made sure to make some tea and have some cough drops ready. I also was a little nervous while completing the environment check. That was when we had to show our testing area to the camera before we could take the test. I made sure to show all of the things I had out so that I would not be suspected of cheating. There were some questions I did not recognize from the practice questions, but I did the best I could. �I only had a small break between finishing my first exam and the start of my second one. So I quickly ate some breakfast and then prepared myself for the next one. I was a little nervous for this one because even though it was open note, I still had not spent much time preparing for it. I would have liked to go over my notes as though I couldn’t use my notes, but I just did not have the time or energy for that. I finished that one and received my grade shortly after, and I did extremely well! I was very pleased with my score. My next exam had a “take-home exam” format. My professor had given us the exam a few days earlier and it just needed to be turned in by midnight. This was my French grammar exam, which is not an easy subject. I gave myself a little break before working on it. My goal had been to do it in pieces, but once again I ran out of time to do that. This left me with only a single page done and about five pages left to go. I knew it would take time, but this test took me a lot longer than I had anticipated to complete. I got stuck on one part near the beginning, so I decided to skip it and come back later. Finally, I finished my last exam. Only one paper left to go. April 24, 2020 This was the first day I let myself sleep in. I figured I deserved it and I only had one thing to do today. Again, I spent some time in the Word and in prayer. It was a slow morning and I let myself relax and enjoy it, before I took the afternoon to work on my paper. It was so strange that I had work to do today. Every other semester, I’ve been done by Thursday. Unfortunately, the coronavirus created a shift in due dates and now my final report was due today. Thankfully, all that needed to be done was a little editing, However, I’m a bit of a perfectionist so the editing took a few hours. But I finished it before dinner and I call that a win! With that I turned it in, and officially ended my sophomore year at Grand Valley. It was definitely not the ending I had imagined for my year. I couldn’t help but compare it to the end of my freshman year. There was more of a resolution with finishing finals and then packing up and moving home. In contrast to this year where I’ve finished my finals, but I’ve been home for about seven weeks. It kind of lacks closure in a chapter of my life. That's just how life goes. It doesn’t always follow the plan or expectation, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t good or that there wasn’t any growth. It just looked different and that isn’t necessarily bad. It’s Friday, so of course my family celebrated the end of my semester with pizza and a movie. I could not wait to truly relax and enjoy the quarantine without worrying about school work. �April 25, 2020 A few days ago, my sister and I had an idea to have a tea party. I said that it needed to wait until after my finals and so it was decided that this Saturday, today, would be our tea party. My dad is gluten-free so we made sure to have snacks that he could enjoy, so I made glutenfree chocolate zucchini muffins that are full of protein. My sister made cucumber sandwiches, both regular and gluten-free. We cut up some strawberries and added some blueberries and raspberries to make a small fruit salad. We also put out some chocolate-chip cookies to enjoy. I love earl gray tea so I decided to make that to drink for our tea party. We used our china plates, tea cups, and saucers to make it a little fancier and more fun. This was definitely the highlight of my day, and perhaps the highlight of the whole quarantine. I had such a wonderful time. It was so relaxing to drink hot tea and eat treats while the Pride and Prejudice soundtrack played in the background. It sort of made me wish that we did it every day. My whole family participated, even my fourteen year old brother. He was very reluctant to join, which was not surprising but we essentially forced him too. Getting him to join our tea parties was a lot easier when he was little. My mom tried to take some pictures, and he straight up jumped out of his chair and onto the floor to avoid any pictures and videos. All it did was make us laugh. April 27, 2020 Ah my first true day of freedom. I got to sleep in, read my Bible, and work out. It was an absolutely beautiful day outside. It was warm and sunny so I went for a walk after I worked out with my mom and sister. Days like these make quarantine seem a little more bearable. I have a few goals that I want to accomplish with all my free time since classes have ended and I can’t work anywhere. One of them is to go through my clothes and get rid of some of them. However, I felt that it would be a waste of a beautiful day to be inside going through clothes so I did not do that today. So I made a salad, and apples with peanut butter for lunch and ate it outside. I then read my book outside for most of the day. Another one of my quarantine goals is to read all of Jane Austen’s novels. I read Sense and Sensibility back in January. I am now working on Pride and Prejudice, which I am enjoying immensely. With good weather inevitably comes grilling so we grilled burgers for dinner, which were satisfying. April 29, 2020 �Today was a rainy day, which sometimes I enjoy almost as much as a sunny day. I slept in and began my morning routine of reading my Bible and then working out with my mom and sister. By the end, we were so hot at the end that we stood out in the drizzling rain and it felt amazing. I finished my goal and finished Pride and Prejudice! It was absolutely amazing! I am very much looking forward to reading the others, although I do not think they’ll be as good as Pride and Prejudice. I also finally started on my other goal of going through my clothes. Today I just worked on going through my dresser. As I sorted through all of my clothes, I was finally able to catch up on some of my podcast episodes. At school, I would listen to them in the bus on my way downtown. However, since I have not done that for several weeks, I had not found a new time to listen to them and had gotten behind. There is something so relaxing about and going through organizing things. My dad also told me today that our church was putting together a video of children wishing their mom a Happy Mother’s Day, so my siblings and I spent some time making that. It had to be done while my mom started making dinner because she would be guaranteed to be distracted and we could film it without her noticing, hopefully. May 1, 2020 I finally got to move out today!! It was such a relief to finally be able to get my things, although there were some rules we had to follow such as wearing masks. My family decided to make the trip to Grand Rapids as fun as possible, so we got Chick-fil-a for lunch on the way up to school; it was amazing. I was the last person to move out of my apartment, so we got stuck with most of the cleaning. My wonderful mom cleaned out the fridge where I had pried a kombucha bottle that belonged to one of my roommates off the shelf. All in all, it took about two hours to clean and pack up all my remaining stuff. It was quite strange to be back when the building was so empty and hardly anyone was there. On the way back we got coffee from Starbucks, again to make our trip out of the house fun. Today was one of my best friends’ birthday and she only lived fifteen minutes away from me. So after we got back and ate dinner, I decided to drive by her house and wish her a happy birthday. We stood outside on her front lawn, several feet apart and got to talk for about 45 minutes. It was so nice to see her for the first time in what felt like forever. As much as I wish that I could have celebrated her birthday like normal, I’m glad that I was able to stop by and chat for a little bit. �May 2, 2020 Today was my best friend’s bridal shower. Before the coronavirus, the shower was going to be at the church with a lot of friends and family. That had to change, so everyone sent gifts to her house and the shower was live-streamed on Facebook. Since I am her maid of honor, she asked if I could be there. After talking with my family, I decided to go. I made sure to take the necessary precautions; I wore my mask and kept my distance while washing my hands and avoiding touching my face. I was so glad that I could support her during this time where so many of her plans have had to change. Once I got home, I found out that my cousins were going to stop by so that we could talk outside while social distancing. That was a pleasant surprise! This past weekend I have seen more people than I’ve seen for the past seven weeks combined! They stayed and talked for about an hour and a half and we chatted about how everyone had been doing. To be quite honest, I’m not sure how much more the general population will listen to social distancing rules. It is getting to the point where we have done this for about two months without any idea about when it will end. I know that I miss seeing people, as many others do. Additionally, the weather is getting nicer which in my eyes only makes it easier to want to break the rules. Well, we’ll see what happens. None of us can know the future except God. May 4, 2020 Many of my days look the same now that classes have ended. I sleep in and then do some combination of reading my Bible, working out, eating breakfast, and drinking coffee. I thrive off routine and it doesn’t really bother me that most of my days look the same. Today I had the inspiration to clean out my craft drawers that have been collecting junk and art supplies since elementary school. It has been a task on my to-do list and when the motivation to organize strikes, I have to act on it. It felt amazing to get rid of stuff I no longer needed and that I had not used in years. I was also able to walk down memory lane a bit with old projects and photos. I found remains of shrinky-dinks from my fifth grade mini society project. There were still some sheets left, so I decided to keep it to do one day. You never know what you might want to do during quarantine. Additionally, I found some things I didn't even know I had such as the combination to a lock that I used for middle school swim and high school P.E., which was lucky because my whole family had forgotten the combination. It was a nice day so we ate dinner outside, as we have been doing these past few weeks. Any chance to get out of the house, even if it’s just to be outside in our backyard, we �take advantage of it. My dad suggested that we have our first bonfire of the year and we all agreed. The tricky thing about a spontaneous bonfire is that we might not have all the necessary items to make s’mores, and unfortunately, we were out of Hershey’s chocolate bars. This forced us to get creative with Nutella and chocolate chips, which wasn’t bad but I think I’ll stick to chocolate bars. May 5, 2020 Again the day started out the same as yesterday: sleep in, read my Bible, work out, eat breakfast, and drink coffee. I usually end up not actually getting ready until like 1pm due to the fact that our workout didn’t start until close to noon because my sister likes to get some homework done before we exercise. My friend had texted me asking if I had any books she could borrow because the library was closed and she was spending too much time watching Netflix. She has texted the right person, as I love to read and have an endless amount of suggestions. I was only limited by the lack of space in my house, causing many of my books to be digital on my Nook. To begin, I suggested To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before series because they are quick and entertaining reads. So she stopped by with her finacé to pick up the books. We then kept our distance in my front yard and got to talk for a little bit. At this point in the quarantine, many of us are longing for actual face-to-face human interaction and relish any chance to talk while still being safe. I then proceeded to watch Gilmore Girls as it was not that nice outside and it is a comfort show for me. I try not to spend all of my time watching tv and being on my phone during this time because I do not think it is that healthy to have that much screen time, even though that would be easy to do. So when it’s nice I try to read outside and take walks or ride my bike. However, sometimes I just want to watch Gilmore Girls and that’s okay. As it is Cinco de Mayo today we decided to order Mexican food for dinner. We tried to order from a local business, but they were extremely busy. So in the end we ordered Chipotle which was delicious, even though it didn’t arrive until 7:30pm which is a late dinner for us. May 6, 2020 My morning routine continues with the same items to start off my day. Today’s differentiating items was a visit with my cousins. One my aunts said her boys were missing their cousins, especially the girls in college, and wanted to see everyone. So the older cousins got together in one of our backyards and talked while maintaining some distance. Again, it was wonderful to actually talk and see people face-to-face, even if it wasn’t quite normal yet. This �afternoon my mom went into work while we were with my cousins, so my dad had the whole house to himself. This is an extremely rare occurrence during quarantine since it’s been the five of us at home all the time. After that, my siblings and I decided to get some iced coffee through the Dunkin’ Donuts drive through. As I’ve mentioned before, I absolutely love afternoon coffee time and I savored every sip of that iced coffee. May 8, 2020 Today was a pretty relaxed day. I had my usual morning routine and the rest of the day to do as I pleased. So I read as I typically do when I have free time. Before I read my next Jane Austen novel, I wanted to break it up with some easier reads. Currently I was working on the second book in a murder msytery series about a lady and her lady’s maid, think Downton Abbey. And I spent most of the day doing that. Now that I’ve gotten used to being home, I’m pretty comfortable with having time to relax and not have many responsibilities. I’m a bit of a homebody, so although I miss being with my friends, I don’t feel like I’m going crazy staying home. It’s Friday so that means it’s pizza night. Tonight we started the Netflix series that most people have started watching during quarantine, Outer Banks. In my mind, it’s THE show everyone will associate with quarantine and this season of life, or at least people my age will associate with this time. It’s geared towards teens/young adults so I was surprised when my dad suggested it for us to watch. It’s a little overly-dramatic, but I was hooked and just enjoyed the unrealistic adventure. May 9, 2020 I had a bit of a shortened morning routine and didn’t work out this morning because I got to work. My mom works at a small business in our town and sometimes her manager has me come into work when things are busy and I’m home. They’ve been slammed with shipping, so I got to go to work today. My mom and I were the only people in the store and we worked on filling orders for curbside pick-up. The store sells olive oils and balsamic vinegars so I spent the whole time filling bottles to complete people’s orders. It felt nice to be out of the house and busy for the first time in a while. We made sure to follow the health guidelines and clean everything we touched before we left. The Starbucks in our town opened back up for pick-ups orders, so we got coffee to bring home for the whole family. �Once we got back home, I found out that my nana had dropped some books off at our house and sadly, we had just missed her. Then I was able to spend the rest of my afternoon relaxing by drinking my coffee and reading. Overall, it was quite a nice day. May 10, 2020 Today was Mother’s Day. My mom slept in while I brewed the coffee and then brought her a cup with the card I had made for her. Then we watched church, which had a special video where kids wished their mom a Happy Mother’s Day, as well as a baby dedication video that our church usually does on Mother’s Day. The baby dedication is a declaration that the family is deciding to raise their child to love and know Jesus, and that the church will come alongside them in that process. After we watched church, my siblings and I made brunch for our mom. We made waffles, bacon, and cut up some fruit. We also did the dishes and then proceeded to make a mess again by making a lemon poppyseed bundt cake from her gluten-free cook book. We also had a tea party for Mother’s Day. We made cucumber sandwiches again and served the lemon poppyseed bundt cake. This tea party was a little less elaborate, but it was still delicious and a fun way to celebrate my mom. For dinner we ordered take-out from Noodles and Company to eat while we watched James Bond per the request of my mom. I was glad we were able to celebrate my mom today even though it looked a little different during this time of staying home. �May 11, 2020 Today was back to the routine of coffee, Bible, breakfast, and then working out. I still felt a little restless after so I took a quick walk around my neighborhood. Once I got back and had showered, my mom reminded me that I still needed to do my taxes. The due date for taxes had been extended because of everything that has happened with coronavirus. I got my first “real” job at the library at Grand Valley’s health campus this past fall, so this was the first time I had to do taxes. Previously, all my other jobs have been babysitting so there’s never been a need to do taxes. It was supposed to be simple enough because I don’t make enough money to support myself and therefore could use TurboTax for free. My mom sat down with me to do them and all was going well until we got to city taxes. She had never had to fill that out, so it was new territory and it caused a lot of strife. Needless to say, I now understand why people hate doing their taxes. Although it is necessary, it sure is a pain. May 12, 2020 My friend was back today to return the books she had borrowed and pick up some new ones. This time she brought some cookies for me as a little thank you. I was really looking forward to seeing her and talking again. I had been thinking of everything I wanted to remember to tell her once we were together in-person. Crazy how you begin to appreciate things you took for granted, like talking with someone in-person. We set up chairs six feet apart and talked for about an hour under the sunshine. That’s something else I’ve come to appreciate more: sunshine and good weather so I can leave my house. After she left, I drove to Michael’s to pick up some supplies I had ordered. My roommates and I decided to make each other gifts for when we move in this August. I saw this really cute idea of making initial key chains out of clay on Pinterest. Then I saw that you could make cute earrings out of clay, so I’ve decided to start a new hobby. Hence, the order at Michael’s. I had almost everything I needed, but I had to order a couple things on Amazon because they weren’t available at Michael’s. I can’t wait to start my new little project. May 14, 2020 Today was a lazy day. It was raining and thundering outside so I pretty much laid around and switched between watching Netflix and reading. I still read my Bible, but we didn't exercise today. That’s fine though because life is all about balance. I started my next Jane Austen novel, Mansfield Park and I think I will still like Pride and Prejudice the best. �My brother wanted to make chocolate chip cookies so he did, however they turned out smaller and puffier than usual. I kept asking him questions to figure what he did wrong because he had used our usual recipe. Finally he admits that he used pure cane sugar. I was a little confused so he showed me the bag he used. He put powdered sugar in instead of granulated sugar. I couldn’t stop laughing because the two look nothing alike. Then I found out this was the SECOND time he’s made that mistake. As a teenage boy, he just goes too quickly and doesn’t pay enough attention to the ingredients he adds to the dough. I probably laughed for 15 minutes about the whole thing. That evening we finally utilised my recently rediscovered shrinky-dinks. We had decided to make it a sibling activity so we all drew and colored some designs onto our sheets. Then we baked them so they curled and then flattened out to our smaller designs. My favorite one that I did was a little pig in a paper airplane; it's adorable. May 16, 2020 Today my sister and I decided to go on a bike ride. We have a trail near our house so that’s where we decided to go. It was a nice and pleasant excursion until we encountered the goose. There were two geese with their babies near the path. I had stopped to wait for my sister because she was a little bit behind. I started to move ahead and the goose hissed at me. I knew geese could be mean so I said that I thought we should turn back. Then a jogger came by giving the geese space and he was fine. My sister decided to follow suit, however the goose did not like that at all. It threw its wings back and chased after her while it hissed. My sister was so scared she threw down her bike and ran back to me. I had been terrified while watching it, but couldn’t help laughing afterwards. The whole situation was funny and frightening. The geese crossed the road and we were able to move ahead. It was quite the story to retell later. After we got back, my mom said she was going to buy some flowers. My sister and I wanted to join her so we ate a quick lunch and then headed out with our masks to buy some flowers at an open market stand. The first place we went to had so many cars there that we knew we wouldn’t be able to park. If there were that many cars, that meant there were probably too many people for it to be ideal to shop. So we went back up the street to another one. This one didn’t have the herbs and lavender my mom wanted, but we bought some flowers anyway. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-05-16_ANON_031 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Anonymous Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-05-16 Title A name given to the resource Anonymous COVID-19 Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of an anonymous GVSU student's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/088a002d1bcb0098ee15d8676ac5ed64.pdf c01a7fc86f3bca37a696375dd33fa129 PDF Text Text May 10, 2020 March 11 was a crazy day. I was working in the library in the morning when I heard about Michigan State being shut down. I thought this was crazy news. Why would it shut down already? It was clear that the coronavirus was a serious issue around the world, but it hadn’t quite touched any of our lives yet. On Wednesday, March 11, the state of Michigan announced its first two cases of the virus, and immediately, universities began shutting down. This didn’t make much sense at the time, but sure enough, Grand Valley made the call too. I was eating dinner at Kleiner Dining Commons when we all received the email. As a Freshman, the only way I can describe this was weird. Personally, I don’t get too worked up by things like this, especially when I know most people around me are reacting more strongly. Still, the environment on campus changed almost instantly. It felt like doomsday as people began leaving. Some were packing up their things and leaving within a half hour. Others (like me) took a few days to get themselves off of campus. The communication we received told us that classes for Thursday and Friday were cancelled. Everyone was feeling a really weird mixture of anxiety about the entire situation, yet freedom from academic responsibilities. It’s not like anyone could focus on schoolwork anyway. Even for those of us who were much more calm, the strange energy in Holton-Hooker, where I lived was too much to do anything productive. I made a lot of Facetime calls to different friends. Video Chatting with others was a great way for me to use my energy to make the best of the situation, and laugh with friends in the midst of everything. I came back to campus the next week with my parents to move out of my dorm completely. Throughout this first week away from campus, I had a really strange energy. Normally, I get stressed out by the day-to-day responsibilities, not the longterm things. This being said, I was really enjoying my time. All of my stress had suddenly vanished. I spent the first few days with my brother and sister-in-law downtown Grand Rapids. The government had just begun encouraging social distancing. Businesses were starting to shut down. The governor called for all nonessential business to first cut down their hours, and then later for them to close. This was the biggest bummer for me. I love doing homework in coffee shops, and this is where I hang out with many friends as well. With everything shutting down, I headed home to my parents. When I finally returned to my home in Portage, I have to admit, I was not happy. I had just begun to really feel really comfortable at GVSU, getting involved in various activities and pursuing my education full-force. My extracurriculars changed greatly when we left campus. This year was the first year GVSU has had a competitive speech team, and I was the first member. The COVID-19 outbreak really threw a wrench in the budding plans of the team. Together with two professors/coaches, I was in the process of preparing for a national tournament and recruiting new team members. However, with the exodus from campus as well as cancellations in speech tournaments, all of this came to a halt. My professors have texted with me, but we decided to start fresh in the fall. The other organization with which I am heavily involved is Campus Ministry (CM). The change from in-person meetings to online events has been a difficult transition as well. Normally, CM meets each Sunday night for a large gathering/church service, called, “The Well.” However, with all that has happened, The Well has changed to digital meetings. Each Sunday, �CM staff and student leaders put together a very well-done video for students. They broadcast it using Facebook Live. They still do music worship, announcements, and a lesson, but it is all put together using Zoom video calls and other things of that nature. It has been very encouraging to know the staff is there for us students, continuing to challenge us in our faith and to be available should we need people to talk to. We also have small group meetings, called Life Groups. These have moved to virtual video chats as well. All of the accommodations have been great, but unfortunately, participation has gone down. I don’t think it’s because of lack of interest, it is just difficult to keep students available at the exact times when it isn’t a live meeting that they can attend alongside many students who are equally excited. College students are really missing community right now - that may be the toughest part of this situation. I am managing to stay positive, but I miss my friends. I have regular meetings set up with them, but never do we have all of us on one call at the same time, and just when I could be progressing other new friendships, I can do nothing but FaceTime these new friends for chats that are good, but awkward nevertheless. I hope this can end soon. I know I am not the only one experiencing hardship, and there are many who are struggling to have good mental health and feel valued in this time of isolation. It is my goal to be better at reaching out and caring more for others during the pandemic. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-05-10_ANON-030 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Anonymous Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-05-10 Title A name given to the resource Anonymous COVID-19 Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of an anonymous GVSU student's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/dfbf04d8c173da04620e22dadb9757f0.pdf cbad287375eed9fd694ca902ee3f817f PDF Text Text Tuesday March 17, 2020 It is definitely weird to be journaling online and for a class, but here we are. A lot has happened in the past week, and I am left jobless, not yet hurting financially but may be soon. I’ve been dealing with the stress of online classes and the constant shutdowns well enough. I am fortunate enough to have a paid internship which will not stop paying me, but my main source of income is now gone as I am a host at Anna’s House and cannot be scheduled now. I understand the necessity for all of this, but as a senior I am immensely frustrated at having to take online courses (and having professors require synchronous classes/uploading videos) when my wifi is fairly unreliable. It works well enough for uploading documents or doing anything that does not require streaming, but my apartment complex had college students do the wiring for the internet so it’s definitely not good. I had been planning on going to the library since it was still open, but now all libraries are shut down. While I’ve seen many have resources surrounding certain internet providers give free internet, I’m not sure I can do so with my apartment. I also have ADD, and it’s bad when I don’t have a space outside of my apartment to study in, or the structure of being in a classroom. I was starting to really understand my CIS class, and now that I’m not in a classroom I fear that the understanding I had will slip and go away. GV did the right thing in closing, as did Governor Whitmer, but I can’t help but feel worried for my future and when this whole thing will blow over. 45 said that it will likely last until July, and while he is a constant liar, he is president and the likelihood of that happening is terrifying. I was hoping the virus would be under control by the end of April, I’m not sure I’d be able to make it financially past that. I know some places are being lenient with rent, but the loss of income is truly scary. I had friends mention filing for unemployment, but the website is down and has been since yesterday. I realize that this entry is a lot of complaining, but I feel like there isn’t an ability to complain right now. Many people feel like if you are anxious, it’s because you’re inconsiderate of people who are at risk, and I’m not. I have many friends who are severely at risk right now, I’m worried about family and grandparents. My dad has diabetes, and so he is also at risk. He’s a driver for the Rapid, and for some reason they are refusing to allow drivers to wear masks so that the public isn’t fearful. I just feel unsure of the future. I heard a rumor that people are trying to get classes to be considered credit/no credit this semester, and honestly, I could see that being an option. I’m considering doing so for my two classes which involve more synchronous activity/video uploading activity since I’m not sure my wifi has the capability to do so. On the bright side (because this has been overwhelmingly negative) my therapist offered to provide counseling over the phone free of charge, or cancel my copay due to losing my job if I were to come in. I’ve had two professors I am close with reach out to me to offer support, two of whom offered to hire me on as a research assistant. I am unsure of how quickly I would be able to work/get paid, but I hope to be able to do so soon! My mentor in charge of my senior thesis is incredibly understanding and has been pushing me to take advantage of Replenish (although I’m not sure if this is still open). She also sent me many texts asking me if I had essential items in the event I were to get sick (it turns out, I don’t, because I usually do not get the flu, but I am planning on going out to get supplies today, hopefully…). �I have been spending a lot of time with my girlfriend, because we’re basically in selfquarantine at this point, and luckily I love my roommate, because we’ve all been together in Allendale. I have stacks on stacks of books I’ve been meaning to read, and I utilized my Schuler’s gift card from Christmas to buy Mary Fulbrook’s Reckonings! I’ve had my eye on it for a while and it looks to be promising, I’ve read quite a few of her books, so I’m eager to dive in. This book deals with a lot of the reconciliation with the Holocaust in Germany, so it’s a topic I’m very interested in generally, the idea of memory and national identity. I am also doing okay with food. I have a lot of chicken, pasta, ribs, beans, and rice to last a while. We’re making bok choy and ginger chicken soup tonight for dinner. Perhaps this is the time to get a bit fancy and experiment with new dishes? I just keep hearing my mom’s voice reassuring me that I should only worry about what I can control. I can’t do anything about classes being online/closing down of my job. But I can worry about planning out meals, budgeting, and ensuring all of my assignments get done to the best of my ability. I can be a self-advocate and communicate with those who care about me about what I need, and try my best to have a positive outlook on everything. I can focus on my relationships with other people, which I think is the primary thing keeping everyone sane at the moment. I think I’ll call one of my friends later today. Update: Looking like no graduation for me...but on the bright side Anna’s House will be paying us for the two weeks that we’re unable to work! I might bleach and dye my hair bright purple? Who knows what I will do while social distancing. Wednesday March 18, 2020 Today I had various over the phone meetings, I filed for unemployment (which I’m sure I messed up and don’t know what the next steps are), I did laundry, and I went grocery shopping. I am experiencing a bit of panic today, I started off relatively calm. I woke up, did some reading of Ozick, said goodbye to my roommate, had some meetings, and washed the dishes. But once I went grocery shopping I started thinking about the possibility of a recession and what I’m going to do if I don’t get into graduate school next year. Overall, I am fairly confident in my ability to survive and keep going, but it was still scary to suddenly have a wash of panic come over me. Thursday March 19, 2020 I finished reading Ozick today, and I hated it. I greatly dislike anytime someone tries to imagine themselves in oppressive environments they’ve never experienced. I once had someone in my Dirty Wars in Latin America class say that had they been faced with death squads, they would’ve fought before the military could have killed his children. It’s not usually a stance I’ve seen in classes on the Holocaust, thankfully. But this book bothered me in the same way. There is no way for us to know how we would’ve responded under those circumstances. Whether we would have complied, resisted, or collaborated. There is just no way to know, we have hopes that we would have resisted, that we would’ve put ourselves in harms way to protect others, the more vulnerable. But we simply cannot know. Because of this, I find The Shawl unsettling. I do not like the idea that we are creating fiction which claims even one experience of a survivor, of any �sort, to feel one way. She can’t know, even if she were to research and interview survivors, she has no way of ever truly knowing. I created this line to differentiate from my discussion of Ozick, I’ve already written my response paper. I went to pick up tacos, and my girlfriend Chloe and I watched a documentary on cults. Despite being raised in one, they still fascinate me. Friday March 20, 2020 I woke up today feeling worse. I’ve had a cough for the past two days, but it wasn’t concerning, it’s gotten worse, but I think it’s just a cold. I’ve been monitoring my symptoms and I just have a cough. Nothing else, plus I’ve barely been out, and if I have it’s been with little contact with others. I did visit my family yesterday briefly, but they’ve also been in quarantine. My dad has a sinus infection, and so he asked me not to hug him. I stood far away from him once he told me, and left shortly after, making sure to tell my mom to disinfect the door handles I touched. I’m worried it’s something more, or it will turn into a more serious situation given that he has diabetes and that puts him more at risk for the coronavirus. Hopefully he gets better. This is giving everyone massive anxiety at the moment, and for good reason. It’s ridiculous how some are not giving this the attention it needs. I decided to remove someone from my Facebook feed because she kept posting things about how the coronavirus wasn’t that serious and that the media was blowing it out of proportion to take away our rights. I just don’t understand how people could blow this off. I was supposed to pick up my tip share today from Anna’s House and I didn’t because I have a cough and didn’t want to risk anyone else who might be there at the same time as me getting ill. Aside from all the usual anxiety surrounding the coronavirus, I’ve been doing good. I’ve gotten all the work I needed to get done, aside from my computer science class, out of the way for the week. I also contacted my advisor to get him to send an email about taking my Spanish class and CIS class as credit/no credit. Both classes have more requirements online (video calling, Blackboard collaborate, programming, etc.) which I find more difficult to do given my internet access. I’m feeling good about my level of productivity to be honest. It’s been rough, and I’ve definitely had moments of panic thinking about an impending recession as I graduate college, but I can’t predict the future. I can only try my best to adequately prepare myself for what I can do. I did get accepted to present my research at the Latina/o Studies Association at Notre Dame! With that added to my CV I will have presented at the Great Lakes History Conference twice, the Michigan Sociological Association, and the Phi Alpha Theta conference in San Antonio in addition to the many times I’ve presented at Student Scholar’s Day. At the moment I am alone, Chloe went out to meet her dad, she’s finally getting her phone fixed. She ran it over when she returned from Tennessee because she was desperately trying to leave her dad’s driveway at 2 a.m., her brother had hit a neighbor’s car and so there was a lot of tension in the air. I’m relieved, for the past two weeks she hasn’t been able to use her phone, and so she’s been hard to contact. Luckily she doesn’t have work right now, but it’s crazy how convenient having a phone is, and what it’s like when you suddenly don’t have one. She has group work and people were trying to form a group chat, which she can’t really do. Now that �she’s out of the apartment, I am planning on cleaning my room and vacuuming. I am normally a very neat person, but she’s like a tornado. She makes messes wherever she goes. That’s all for now. I’m off to vacuum. Tuesday March 24, 2020 The past few days have been strange. I’m finally over my cold. My nose is slightly stuffy but I am no longer having trouble with a sore throat and cough. Despite Governor Whitmer’s order, my apartment complex, Trio (do not ever live there), decided to give us a brand new roommate. I am stressed about having to continue self-quarantine for three more weeks, because I miss being outside. The order said we could still exercise so I’m thinking of going to a nearby park (that usually doesn’t have many people) and going for a walk and doing some reading. I am going insane not being able to be outside, especially with seasonal depression. It’s being prolonged. I understand, but I greatly need some exercise and fresh air. I’ve been practicing my makeup again. Being so sick I was barely able to do anything, and doing my makeup despite not being able to go out makes me feel prepared for the day. Wednesday March 25, 2020 Today was a day of deep cleaning. I spent the day doing laundry, cleaning the bathroom, washing my makeup brushes, and spring cleaning my room. I threw out quite a bit, and I completely reorganized everything. My desk is clear, I have all of my rocks and seashells on my window pane, in addition to my two small cacti. I have two succulents, but I need to get a smaller pot for one of them because it’s too large to fit comfortably on my small bookshelf. All of my plants are doing well, it makes me quite happy. Thursday March 26, 2020 Journaling and planning out my weeks is the only way I am able to keep track of my days, because it feels like everything is a bit of a blur. I’m sure I downplayed how sick I was last week, but thinking back on it, and given how sore my nose is from blowing it, it was pretty bad. I FaceTimed one of my friends yesterday, Laura. They attend Harvard, and so seeing their apartment is always insane, given the amount of money the institution has. Unfortunately, the connection wasn’t great, so it was difficult to hear them, even with me using my phone’s data. I haven’t seen them in person since last June when we were at a summer program at the University of Michigan together, and it’s a shame. I miss them. MY EAR WON’T POP AND I’M IRRITATED. IT’S BEEN STUCK LIKE THIS FOR DAYS. I HATE BEING SICK/RECOVERING FROM SICKNESS. I just found out my unemployment claim was denied. So, that’s fucking fantastic. I’ve been on hold to chat with a representative for the past twenty minutes which is also just amazing. �Update: I was on hold for two hours, got off hold, asked a question, and then was disconnected. I am extremely upset and angry. Friday March 27, 2020 I had a call with Dr. McKee and went over the next steps for my senior project. All seems to be going well. I took a shower and it made my ear worsen, which is frustrating. Chloe thinks it’s an ear infection, but I really hope not, given that there is little option to go to the doctor right now. Not that I would normally, with how expensive it is, but especially now. Anna’s House had a conference call today, and the update provided is slightly confusing, but it seems like they’ll be paying us for two more weeks. So, ultimately, they have decided to provide us with a full month’s worth of wages. I really did not expect this from them, given what I know about other donations/business practices, but it’s really surprised me and made me relieved to see the attitude those in management have towards their workers. Sunday March 29, 2020 I had a call yesterday with Dr McKee, she had mentioned nominating me for an award based off of my senior project. While exciting, I am scared of disappointing her. I need to ensure I write much more this upcoming week, but I also just realized I have a ton of big assignments coming down the pipeline. I feel like I am struggling to survive with the expectations some professors continue to have while I am unsure of when I will be able to return to work. It’s looking to be the end of April/beginning of May at the earliest? I don’t know what I can do. I am supposed to provide Michigan State with an answer about where I will be attending by the 15th of April, and while I was fully expecting to reject the offer, the impending recession/depression has me second-guessing my decision. While I want to get started on my Ph.D., if there’s a depression coming down the pipeline, it really is in my best interest to apply and attend a university that has a better reputation for Latin American history. MSU’s program isn’t particularly strong outside of the African diaspora, and I want to ensure I have the proper tools to thrive as a Mexicanist. On the other hand, it’s an ensured job/path to my future. I’m hoping I’ll find something in the meantime, I always figure it out. Whether it’s continuing to work at Anna’s House part-time with an additional job on the side, or finding more meaningful work, I will survive until I get into another graduate program I can envision myself in. Monday March 30, 2020 I received an email today informing me that I was accepted into the Ph.D. program at Indiana University in Bloomington! I’ll be moving there in August. Wednesday April 1, 2020 I’ve been spending some time trying to figure out housing in Bloomington, which is insane and scary given that I can’t visit the city where I will be spending the next 7 or so years of my life. I won’t be able to meet professors in person, see the library, or interrogate History Ph.D. �students about the culture of the department. I know I have a good funding package, but I’d have liked to be able to go down and see the apartment I’d be living in. Ride the bus to the building I’ll be in on campus. Figure out where I’ll be going to get food and how to get there from where I live. That’s all postponed and will be happening virtually, which I’m not a fan of. Additionally, I feel like finishing the semester online is catching up to me. We have a few weeks left, and final projects are coming on quickly. I’m not sure how I’ll be able to do all of this with no ability to go to a library, meet with classmates, or have access to a printer and be able to have physical copies of books I request from the library. Never before have I realized how reliant I am on the library. It’s truly an incredible space, and I am lucky to be able to utilize it and have figured out how to do interlibrary loans. I barely bought any books this semester, and now that the end of the semester is here, it’s become very frustrating to try to get access to books the library has physical copies of, that I cannot pick up. I’m a very tactile person, I need to be able to physically do a lot. Highlight the copies of chapters I have, or use sticky notes to mark important points for my papers. I miss being able to sit down in the library and spend a long evening combing through books I’ve gathered and jotting down notes. It’s a very mundane part of college, but it’s one of my favorites. Chloe and I love going to the library with snacks and a small blanket and really finding a great spot to spend hours as we work on history papers together. It’s that sense of community that I miss. As we continue living in lock down, I hope it’s an aspect of life I can return to soon. Friday April 3, 2020 I spoke to a graduate student at IU over Skype today! I’m glad I did. Margarita was really nice and easy to talk to. We have similar interests in research, and she told me about a paper someone had done where they revealed a revelation that Emiliano Zapata had been gay! I’m hoping that she’s able to send me this grad student’s work, because it’s immensely interesting and I’d love to see their argument/resources. She also offered to help me look for an apartment and gave me quite a bit of advice on life as a first year graduate student at IU. I’m planning on sending her a few apartments I’ve checked out. I'm still unsure of whether or not I should find roommates or live by myself for the first year. Bloomington isn’t too expensive, and is actually a much cheaper place to live without a roommate than Grand Rapids, but it does give me anxiety to try to do so in a city I’m unfamiliar with. I also had the opportunity to call a scholar Dr. McKee had put me in contact with. That was slightly awkward, but it was still really insightful. She was blunt, and I appreciated it. Margarita was a lot more positive about IU, which is good, but I also needed to hear about what’s going to be a challenge. I think at the forefront of what I need to consider is my mental health and finding community. Both are aspects of life I struggle with now, and I anticipate it continuing to be difficult, especially in a graduate program, and one which is five hours away. It’s strange. I still need to finish out this school year but I’ve lost my motivation to do so. I can’t find it within myself to complete the work expected of me in my internship, and while I’ve been keeping up with all of my classes, there are definitely two that have fallen through the cracks. I was denied unemployment, and while my job has continued to pay me, they are trying to encourage us to deny payment and accept unemployment as it’ll provide us with more funds. I’m seriously stressed, and the expansion of the time we will be spending in quarantine is bound �to drive me crazy. I’m sure that part of my procrastination has to do with the fact that I have a plan for the upcoming school year. I don’t need to worry about finding a job post-graduation anymore, and I have a set income. A good one, definitely more than I would have gotten through MSU. It’s like I’m dedicating my time and resources to what I can control, which is planning for a future outside of COVID-19. Tomorrow I have the opportunity to call another graduate student, which will be exciting. For now, I’m off to work on homework and final projects... Saturday April 4, 2020 Today I brought my dad lunch, he is still driving for the Rapid and was in Allendale doing the 50/85 route. He’s upset he hasn’t been laid off, primarily because he’s highly fearful of getting the virus. It's understandable, my mom is highly cautious at the moment, Chloe and I went shopping with her the other day, because she has a Sam’s Club card. Chloe’s laptop broke down and it was one of the only places we were able to go to get a new one. When we met in the parking lot, she brought out hand sanitizer for us to use, gave us gloves and masks, and only then she hugged me hello. I’m glad I saw my dad...moving to Bloomington has riddled me with anxiety and I’m super scared to have to do so. I’ve been riddled with anxiety, but it was nice to see him for a bit. He rattled off a list of things we need to replace in my car before I move in August. Sunday April 5, 2020 Oy. I’ve been apartment hunting today as well. It seems like the more I research the more I’m scared I won’t find a place. There are so many complexes and landlords which people are warning me against on the internet, which is spooky, as they’re usually the ones I was strongly considering until people retell their horror stories. I was planning on getting roommates in order to counter costs, but quite a few people have ghosted me, and now I’m unsure of whether or not I’d be able to find anyone to live with. The problem is, I’m sure others would be more open to helping me out if I’d had the opportunity to go visit the program in person. Monday April 6, 2020 I just finished speaking to Isabel on the phone, and she was so insanely nice. I was blown away by her personality, and her frankness. It was really refreshing to have someone tell me straight out who I should be more wary of. Overall the day was good, my internet keeps cutting out though, which was annoying. I’m trying to do homework, work, and just attempting to prepare for my move. Skyping and chatting with people is getting to be really hard, especially since it’ll freeze after about an hour and makes it nearly impossible to continue. Wednesday April 8, 2020 �I had the opportunity to speak to Dr. Krista Benson today, which was very helpful. They raised quite a bit of important points which I should be considering when speaking to Dr. Guardino in regards to graduate school and the department. Specifically, whether or not my stipend is pre or post tax, if I am expected to use all of my research summer funding in archives in Mexico, or would I be able to utilize it for conferences. What conference funding looks like, how many students finish in five years, and what funding is available for those who are past year five. Additionally, they wanted me to inquire about whether teaching appointments are 50 percent, and if so whether or not we can take a higher percentage in order to earn more. I also have to ask how those positions are assigned. After speaking with Dr. Benson, I spoke to Casey through Zoom, and miraculously the internet did not cut out after an hour (it cut out two times while I was chatting with Dr. Benson). He was insanely nice and easy to talk to. I really appreciated how welcoming he was, how excited he was about me joining and about the department in general. He gave me a lot of good advice, and he also offered to go check out apartments for me and reach out to graduate students who may be looking for roommates. Every time I speak to a grad student at IU I find myself really excited to attend. I did not anticipate that I’d be so thrilled about the environment I’d be in, but the prospect of being in Bloomington is promising, although daunting. I’m scared, but I’m also excited to be in an environment where everyone is as passionate about history as I am. I can’t wait to be surrounded by intellectual conversations about neoliberalism, colonialism, and gender and sexuality all situated within a Latin American history context. I’m worried about being apart from Chloe, but am confident that we can do this. Thursday April 9, 2020 I had my first anxiety attack of the quarantine yet, it’s been almost a month, and it’s getting to me. I hate being at home, and feeling bombarded by work, but with no motivation to do it all. It’s difficult for me to have a separation between relaxation and work. I don’t know how to do it. Usually when I need to get things done, I spend a day at a coffee shop, or at the library, and I get things done! I feel like I’m going back and forth on productivity, one day I’m super productive, I get the work I need to get done finished, and I feel great, and then the next I feel lethargic, anxious, and I do work, I research IU and try to gather information, talk to potential roommates, etc. But I’m not getting vital things for my coursework or work done! I can work from home, but not all the time! Things are falling through the cracks, really falling. It’s bad. I feel like I’m letting people down and I hate to do that. I just want to be able to go outside and not feel scared about it. I want to be able to go to a bookstore and browse the shelves! I want to be able to go to the park, and not care if someone gets near me. I miss human connection! I even want to go to work, and I hate going to work most of the time! I just hate being cooped up, I want to go to a movie theater, to go on dates. I want to be able to hang out with my friends. As of right now the governor has extended it to May 1st, and I really hope it ends there. I need to make money, I need to save for my move. I was denied unemployment, we’re waiting on those checks from the government but I don’t even know for sure that I’m getting one! I feel like the world is falling apart and I am here trying my best to stand my ground. It’s scaring me. �Growing up, I was a Jehovah’s Witness. We were constantly told stories about the end of the world, Armageddon. If we weren’t good enough, we wouldn’t make it to an eternal paradise. We would die, alongside the rest of the non-Jehovah’s Witnesses. I had nightmares about it. Me, a little girl (at the time) who felt out of place as a girl, and who didn’t know that I was queer. For reference, these were the images I grew up seeing in my “Book of Bible Stories” and other JW publications: Jehovah’s Witnesses everywhere are convinced that the world is currently coming to an end, that this is the “beginning of the system of things.” While I no longer am part of the religion, I realized today that I am reliving the trauma of having grown up with these beliefs. I started to have trouble breathing as I cried, and I found myself asking Chloe if this was the end. It’s an inherent feeling that I am being punished, which is, of course, absurd. This cannot be happening only to me, and it's not happening because I have sinned against god. But yet I’ve been programmed to think so. In times like these, where I find myself reverting back to old ways of thinking, I have to tell myself that everyone is going through this right now. Everyone is struggling. There is not one person who is (not absurdly rich) that is thriving under these circumstances. And while bleak, it helps. No other time in history (that I know of, and I’m a history major) has the entire world stood still and ordered everyone to stay home. It’s a crazy thing to be living through, and I’m not sure why, but that brings me some level of comfort. Undoubtedly, this will be a well studied time period in the future by historians. They will look back and study how people dealt with the quarantine. Someone on twitter made a joke about how in a few years we’re going to be seeing articles on “queering the quarantine: towards radical forms of queer isolation,” (I can’t find the original tweet otherwise I’d include it here, but someone did already go ahead and make a spotify playlist named this. Can be found here). In that I take comfort, that I am taking part, however passively, in history. Friday April 10, 2020 �Another day where my main thing to look forward to was a meeting. I had a meeting with Dr. McKee to discuss some slight revisions on my senior thesis. Nothing too major, it was primarily focused on me providing more detail in my earlier sections. In the interest of giving some insight into what my senior thesis is, I will provide some context for what it is I’m working on. I am essentially discussing Guatemalan adoption to families in the United States, but I’m also taking into account how Guatemala came to be such a big sending nation to the U.S. in terms of children. Guatemala has a long-standing history of U.S. intervention into economic interests in the nation, namely with the United Fruit Company which owned a large portion of land in the nation and controlled a lot of governmental decisions undertaken. What resulted was an impoverished and exploited indigenous population. U.S. overthrowal of a democratically elected president, who prioritized Guatemalan economic interests led to a series of strongmen being in power, and a thirty year civil war ensued. In the midst of this civil war, children were being taken from families considered subversive, and once the country’s civil war “ended” children began to be trafficked into adoption agencies who would send them to the United States. Now this ended in 2008, when Guatemala gained international attention for the horrendous practices at play, but with separations at the border which began to take place, Americans who desired to adopt children easily had a newfound access point. I am so excited to be working on this project, I find it invigorating academically, and it fills me with anger and yet curiosity to understand the operations at play. A lot of my edits have to do with ensuring I am engaging properly with a lot of adoption scholars, as Dr. McKee knows of who I should be engaging with, and finding access to them, as well as time to read all of it. She wants to turn it into an article, which I am excited about, and hope to do, as I’m sure it will make me far more marketable and competitive for funding once I am at IU. I also spoke to Dr. Guardino today, which was great. I am once again excited beyond belief to join the history department at Indiana University. He was excellent in explaining the town and (lack of) diversity in the area. He really reassured me that there are ample opportunities past the fifth year to continue getting funding, it would just be without my fellowship. I did have some questions he wasn’t able to answer, mainly about taxes, but overall it was instrumental to understanding how I will be able to build a relationship with him as my advisor. He discussed individuals leaving the program as a positive thing, saying that he didn’t like to say people “dropped out” because it wasn’t negative, they had found their path. I’m sure it’s definitely going to be very tough, the first year always is, according to everyone I’ve spoken to, but the prospect of a new beginning is enthralling. Saturday April 11, 2020 I found a potential roommate! Her name is Sarah and she lives at Sassafras Hill Apartments, I’m excited, she seemed really nice and we set up a time to Zoom, which was intensely awkward but good. It’d be a financial relief for sure to room with someone else, but it does give me anxiety to go in somewhat blind in terms of apartments and roommates. What excites me about the possibility of living with Sarah is that she’s a four year grad student and has been living in Bloomington much longer than I have. But at the same time, Chloe is planning on moving to Bloomington after her graduation a year from now, and I’d like for us to be reunited as soon as possible, especially after living in different states for 9 months and I wouldn’t want anyone to feel it sprung upon them, that I would like to live with my partner while they were �expecting me to stick around. Today was a day of ups and downs for sure. While I felt relieved about finding a potential roommate, I also have to do a group project for my Soviet History class and had to deal with a very hostile groupmate. I had tried setting up a method of communication which would be effective for everyone (group chat) and it was denied, and then I tried providing suggestions for the project and one guy in particular, who had sent me an annoyed email about the group chat, also emailed me a very rude email about how he didn’t want to do my idea because it wasn’t convenient for him. Finishing the email with, “please let me know when you receive this email as I have things I need to do.” The entire language of the email caused me to cry out of frustration, I’m obviously not going to include the email, but it was intensely rude and hostile. I ended up emailing my professor to ask to complete the assignment alone, and luckily it was granted. I really don’t need the stress of trying to find a place to live in another state, filing for unemployment, applying for jobs, and dealing with an egotistical group member. Sunday April 12, 2020 Chlo and I have begun watching a bit of Naked and Afraid, one of her dad’s students, a GVSU alum (!), was on the show and so we watched the season he was on. It was definitely interesting to be able to share this show with her, it’s one my family would sit around and watch together. It’s really interesting to watch, given that they’re such dangerous situations and you get to see real depictions of how people react to dehydration, extreme fatigue, and finding food in the wild. I’ve done a lot of sharing different shows I grew up watching with her, in addition to showing her iconic movies she never saw growing up. Well, as wholesome as watching fun shows with my girlfriend is, I am going to rant about what just happened to me at Meijer. Chloe and I were leaving Meijer, having stocked up on a good amount of groceries for the upcoming two-ish weeks and gotten Starbucks, when the alarm at the door went off. Now, I always say hello to the Meijer greeters, so I had said hello to her when I walked in, and we had done the self-checkout near her, as well as gotten the Starbucks near her. She had seen us pay, I know she had because we had made eye contact. At Starbucks, I threw away my receipt. I explained this to her when I was leaving, and she made me go back and get my receipt out of the garbage. She didn’t ask Chloe, my white girlfriend, for her receipt, she didn’t even look at her when the beeping started, she looked at me and told me to go get it out of the trash. I did, I wish I hadn’t, I wish I had spoken to the woman working who had helped me at the self check out to prove I had bought it, or pulled up my bank info or something, but I dug through the trash and got my receipt. When Chlo and I got to the car I broke down crying. People have been showing how they really feel about people of color a lot of more nowadays, whether they realize it or not. Older white people have been rude to me in the aisles, gotten way too close and shoved me, I’ve gotten more dirty looks than ever while shopping with Chloe. We’re taking precautions, keeping our distance, yet I am being treated in a worse way than I normally experience. So I had an anxiety attack, I’ve had more anxiety attacks in my time at home than I have had in the past year. I’m sick of all of this. �Monday April 13, 2020 I had a Zoom call with a student in the Gender Studies department, and that was so awkward. It was honestly kind of awful, Margarita introduced me to him through email, and so I figured I’d give him a call. He didn’t know why I was calling and I didn’t know what to discuss since he was a very quiet person. I did ask some basic questions about queer identity and Bloomington in general, which provided a lot of interesting information around parking in the area. I definitely will be more careful with who I contact in the future, since it was pretty painful to have the video call quite honestly. Tuesday April 14, 2020 Chloe and I went to Grand Haven today and found a spot on the beach to sit and enjoy the waves. They were huge, and I love having the opportunity to sit in nature. We made sure to sit at a distance from anyone else, there were mainly people parked sitting in cars staring at the waves. It was pretty cold but there were some people surfing on the waves, and it was so fun to watch. I’m not sure why, but I find myself mesmerized whenever I am in nature. It’s like it revives me. It could be me sitting outside on a lawn, feeling the grass between my fingers, in a forest, looking at the sun peaking through the treetops, or just watching the waves and thinking about how incredible and dangerous the water can be. Whenever I’m having a bad day I like to go for walks or just sit outside, so it was so nice to feel the wind on my face and be able to sit in the sand. I just feel revived. I’m so happy. Wednesday April 15, 2020 I received my stimulus check from the government today and paid off my Discover credit card! There goes over 1,100 of debt! I am so extremely happy and proud of myself to have paid off so much debt this year. This year thus far I have completely cleared 2,000 in debt that I had accrued from: getting kicked out when I came out, getting surgery, getting glasses, and medical expenses for my dog. I still have to pay off my laptop, but I’m hoping that’ll be something I can try to clear up as much as possible this summer and next. Being in debt and racked by monthly payments is a feeling I wouldn’t wish on anyone, it’s nerve wracking and anxiety inducing to not know if you’ll be able to make the monthly payments, and feeling like it’s a never-ending task to pay them off. I had also used my tax return to pay off one of the accounts completely, I’m just really proud of myself for the financial decisions I made this year so far. I was so excited to get out from under debt and to improve myself, and while this pandemic has set me back I’m still hopeful I’ll get there someday. Saturday April 18, 2020 We went to the park today! There’s a park out here in Allendale where Chloe and I took our dinner and sat on a bench and just enjoyed the sun setting. In the middle of us sitting and eating a group of girls pulled up in two different vehicles. There was a bathroom nearby so it was �somewhat blocking our view of what was happening but we could see two big groups of girls trying to swing at each other and screaming. One called the other girl the n-word (all were white), and after about five minutes both groups got into their cars and left. It was so strange, and irritating because they presumably don’t all live together and are clearly breaking social distancing but it was definitely a spicy occurence in an overall chill and slightly dull day. Tuesday April 21, 2020 I bit the bullet and signed a lease today. There goes $775 of my savings. I applied for the unemployment pandemic thing but who knows if I’ll get anything, there’s a group on Facebook filled with people who haven’t gotten any money despite being approved and those who’ve been denied and have been on the phone everyday for hours on end for weeks trying to make sense of it all. I’m anxious because the rent is so high and that means that I’ll owe $675 on the first of August in Bloomington without actually needing to be there until the 24th but hopefully it’ll be okay. My plan is to work two jobs this summer before August so that I can afford the move and save some money before the stipend kicks in. This is all intensely stressful and it’s also exam week so...that’s great. I did start applying to jobs this weekend and got a call back from Biggby and scheduled a job interview for Saturday. Wednesday April 22, 2020 I was approved for the pandemic assistance! I hope I actually get it, oh my god. I am so happy. I also had emailed Dr. Guardino and asked about when I would receive my stipend and he offered to loan me the money for the apartment so that I am able to secure my first month in Bloomington! I am so intensely happy and thankful. If I’m able to secure the assistance (and actually receive it) I won’t have to borrow money from him and my first month will be covered. I’m not sure that will happen given how much trouble everyone else has had but hopefully I’m all set once I certify. I’ve never looked down on anyone who had to file for unemployment, but I truly did not realize just how awful it is, the system is ridiculous and impossible to navigate. I didn’t even receive an email notifying me that I had been approved, I had to check today and even then, when I login, it doesn’t say I’ve been approved. I had to go to a completely different part of the site to see it. All that has been proved to me over and over again throughout this pandemic is that our country is broken. People are not willing to listen to our governor, who is trying to save their lives, and are willing to put themselves and others at jeopardy to protest when they are the same people who will argue for violence against black and brown people who protest police brutality. Once again the nation is bailing out big businesses while they are failing those who are most vulnerable. These are all things I already knew, but to see them highlighted on a massive scale finally feels like most individuals who were content to sit back and watch are having a realization of the devastation which is caused. But, per usual, nothing will happen. Come November I will be forced to vote for Joe Biden, who is not a progressive in any way, and who has had allegations of sexual misconduct �against him, in order to get Trump out of office. All that has been highlighted is my utter disgust of the current administration, something I had tried to engage with at a bare minimum, enough to be engaged but not enough to give me an aneurysm on a daily basis. I am just disheartened, it makes me want to not vote, it won’t accomplish anything, my not voting, but it just disgusts me to have to vote for Joe Biden. I’m not confident in his ability to win, nor in who he is. What has happened is this: this pandemic has forced me to sit and think. I have nothing but time to think about my life, what is important to me, my values, my goals for my life, what has happened to me to shape the person I am today. I have come to many conclusions. 1. I do not want to live a life where I am constantly worried about money and where one small instance can cripple me. (I guess I really shouldn’t have chosen to go into the humanities but…) 2. I want to use my life to benefit those who are less fortunate than I am. Despite not having an easy upbringing, I can recognize that if it weren’t for quite a few mentors in my life, I wouldn’t have gotten as far as I did. The myth of meritocracy is alive and well but I do not believe in it. 3. Activism is vital. I want to figure out how to support it and be involved while maintaining my mental health. 4. I value people. I did not realize just how hurt I would be to be restricted from human connection, and to see so many suffering. I broke down crying at the protests because of the complete disregard for the safety of others. I would like to find a way to use my love of people to make a difference. Thursday April 23, 2020 I certified for my week's unemployment, but am super scared I’ll end up messing up or accidentally doing something wrong because I don’t understand the system. I just have massive anxiety that I'll accidentally perjure myself somehow. I was actually super productive this week, which was nice. I got a lot of work for Cook Leadership Academy done! Update: I just realized my last date of employment was the 18th although I stopped working on the 11th, and I already forfeited my potential earnings, so I won’t be in danger of perjuring myself (or shouldn’t be, I’m still scared). Hopefully I’ll get the earnings in time? Friday April 24, 2020 I graduated? I submitted my final exams but it just didn’t feel monumental. I’m the first person in my family to have gone to university, and while I wasn’t sure about whether I was going to walk, I still wanted to have the option to do so. I’m unsure of whether or not I’ll be attending the makeup graduation in October since I’ll already be in graduate school in Bloomington. It just feels fruitless to do so, especially when I have another graduation so far down the line, and a far more important one. I’m hoping to catch up on some reading and relax. Probably try to do some more networking with people in Bloomington, read some articles from the faculty I’d like to work with, and relax. Get back into some hobbies like painting, journaling, and making crafts. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-04-25_GarciaKendra Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Garcia, Kendra Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-04-25 Title A name given to the resource Kendra Garcia Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of GVSU student Kendra Garcia, detailing their experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/866a0c63f9a7370f6dde180dee1023c7.pdf 1833174f5e785025d63bf202450f9c7c PDF Text Text 3/27/2020, 7:36pm EST It has only been four days since the Governor’s executive “stay at home” order went out and two weeks since classes went online, but pre-quarantine life seems like it was an eternity ago. Many of my friends have already lost their patience for this new form of asocial living. For a week, we all hid in our houses, sanitized our door knobs, our phones, our hands, and took action to “flatten the curve”. If you ask my peers, they’ll still tell you that this is the appropriate course of action, but they won’t follow through. One of my friends is a nursing student. In the beginning he was actively tracking the numbers, notifying us all of every new case and enthusiastically showing anyone and everyone “proper handwashing technique”. Today I spoke to him and he seemed dismissive. “Well, she only came over because we all know her, like she’s friends with everyone in the house, and she’s been really lonely.” This was his response to my concerns about their household continuing to admit visitors. A household of seven, I might add. One of the members of that household is my girlfriend. Tomorrow she is moving out. Temporarily - not that we know how long temporarily is right now. When she broke the news to her closest friends that she was leaving to live with me, so she could isolate herself as recommended, she was met with an uncomfortable silence. I can tell this has been upsetting her. Today as she packed her belongings she called to consult me. “What is the point of me coming to live with you if you are going to keep volunteering at that food pantry?” She says her roommates - our friends - have been judging her for this choice. That they don’t see the logic in it. “You know, you don’t have to come live with me. I know we made this decision rather abruptly and I would 100% understand if you changed your mind. I know it’s a lot.” And it is a lot. Only thirteen months into a relationship and we will be trapped in an empty house together - with nothing to occupy her mind other than her hobbies. I am grateful I still have my employment, my school, and my volunteering to keep me sane. But I worry about the tension this could create. We talked for a while about her concerns. I told her I would give up my volunteering if that made her feel safer, and I would. We both realize that our friends are reacting this way out of guilt guilt because they know they could also be doing more to protect themselves and the people they care about. But instead they rationalize and make exceptions. I only hope that none of them are exposed to the virus, because if one of them gets sick it will surely spread through that household like a wildfire. 3/29/2020, 11:03AM EST I can hear the wind whistling past my doorway. Kelly has just left for a bike ride, leaving me alone to my studies. I sit hunched over my desk, wrapped in a blanket, flipping through Panopto �videos with our biochemistry lecture material. I pause the video mid-sentence, as my attention jumps from the specifics of glycolysis to my planner. Did I write down our exam for next week? It would be a shame if I missed it - something I am likely to do with no set schedule. The exam is to be posted on blackboard Friday morning from 9am-11am, which means I have to start it before 10am because the exam times out after an hour…. or does that mean I have until 11am to start it? I note it as being until 10am just in case. My attention flips again. Now I’m checking the due dates for our MasteringPhysics assignments. I add another to my planner for the month of April. My attention fips again. I’m frantically scrolling through the announcements page of my psychopathology course. Dammit, the discussion board on Anorexia closed last night. Did I get all of my required submissions in? I search among our professor’s many updates to find the one with our new grading criteria - it's 25 posts down and was only sent a week ago. Shit, we needed 3 posts and I only posted 2. Minus another three points if any of your posts are from the same day. Are mine? I check. Posted 4 days ago. Posted 3 days ago. I let out a sigh of relief. Still missed 4 points for that last post, but eh. I search through the announcements again. Good, there are still extra credit opportunities. I make a note to myself to watch one of the videos in eReserve today and write a summary. I turn my attention to our case study analysis. Now that we are online it will surely be even more difficult to get my partner to carry her weight. Shit that’s due Thursday too. I add it to the list. The door downstairs cracks open. Kelly is back. I realize I spent almost the whole time she was gone updating my planner. What was I supposed to be doing...? My ADD-riddled brain is not having a fun time with these online classes. 3/30/2020; 5:02PM Today I ventured outside for the first time in what I am now realizing has only been a weekend, but has felt like several weeks. And by “ventured outside” I guess I really mean “I interacted with the public today”. Unfortunately, this venturing was for medical care. Nothing serious or emergent - well, I guess semi-emergent. I had a suspicious mole biopsied about a month ago. It came back as “severely dysplastic”, which I guess is an indicator of increased risk of melanoma. It’s also something that can develop into melanoma. At first when my dermatologist office called and said they wanted to remove the spot I was annoyed. Mind you the “biopsy” that had previously been done took several weeks to heal and basically looked like they had removed the entire thing. When this whole pandemic things started getting serious the office called again and asked if I was okay with moving my “surgery” back to May. Since I didn’t really want the surgery anyways, I figured it couldn’t hurt. But a few days later, the spot started coming back. I called and moved the appointment closer. Since in the week leading up to my appointment the pigmentation had almost fully returned. It �was actually rather alarming. I quickly went from being annoyed at the thought of having another procedure to fearing that I did in fact have melanoma. So here we are today. As I approached the office I was greeted by numerous large printed stop signs. They universally proclaimed that only individuals who had appointments and had experienced no symptoms of illness were to enter the office. When I approached the desk, they stopped me and took my temperature from a distance. In spite of this initial eerie demonstration, the rest of my appointment was seemingly normal. Other than the fact that I left with a giant scar in my abdomen. I may have underestimated the extensiveness of the surgery. Afterwards we picked up some Olive Garden to-go - tragically they only gave us 2 breadsticks (who goes to Olive Garden and only eats TWO breadsticks???). And then, because I only had ibuprofen at home, we had to stop at a pharmacy for some tylenol. There were two things that stood out to me about that Walgreens: 1) Blue painters tape marked 6-foot intervals on the floor. I guess to help customers visualize how far apart they needed to stay? 2) The shelving area that normally holds tylenol and acetaminophen was entirely empty. I can only assume the later of these two observations is the result of all the media telling people to have tylenol at hand in the case they get sick. Because apparently ibuprofen either isn’t helpful or makes things worse? Thankfully, the Tylenol wasn’t actually sold out, it had just been shifted to a smaller display at the front of the store. I guess they want to make sure people don’t try to steal it or buy the whole shelf or whatever. After all, these are wild times. 4/1/2020; 5:54PM Yesterday we took a walk in the evening. I told myself that I would go on a walk every day, but today I worked on my coursework all morning and afternoon. We just had dinner and now I only have an hour until my evening shift at work. I am not going to get a chance to leave the house today and that saddens me a little. I know I should be thankful I still have a job. Thankful that I still have income and something to keep me busy, but honestly work has been rather depressing lately. I’ve been picking up more hours because, well, what else do I have to do? And I don’t have any reason to ask my coworkers to pick up a shift because it’s not like I have anywhere else to be. At first it was nice working online and things being slow. I could get paid to sit at my desk and do homework, as long as I kept a few extra tabs open and maintained one eye on our chat in case there was a student who needed help. But at this point it just feels isolating. If given the option I would certainly rather have the “inconvenience” of driving to campus and looking alert and attentive. Before the library closed I could look forward to chatting with coworkers every week. I was even starting to make friends with a few of the new hires from the fall. We’d gossip and joke and even �when we were just sitting and doing homework, it was nice to sit with someone in productive silence. I also miss the students. If I’m being completely honest, there are certainly times when I would hope to go through my shift without having an appointment. I mean, everyone has those days when they didn’t study enough for their exam and are secretly counting on using that precious hour on the clock to cram. Or when you did study and now you’re so tired from pulling that allnighter that you don’t have the energy to hold a conversation. But for the most part, I have always really enjoyed my consultations. I love how energizing it can be to see a concept finally click for one of my peers. I love hearing about people’s interests and questions and ideas and I love the challenge of helping a student find information about a topic I have never studied in my life. Since we went online three weeks ago, I have only had one consultation and it was short and awkward because well technology doesn’t always cooperate. I miss the previous frequency of when my work was actually work and it saddens me deeply to know that there are many of my coworkers whom I will never see or speak to in person again. 4/2/2020 1:01PM It is so sunny today. It is only 57 degrees out, but it feels much warmer. We took a picnic to campus and sat in front of Zumberge pond, crunching apples and watching the geese. I tried to feed the geese (aka I threw apples at them), but they just swam away. Campus is eerily quiet. We saw one man driving around in a van. He seemed to be using his phone to do a voice recording? I wonder if they are doing virtual tours of campus because all of the in-person tours stopped. I wonder how it is right now for students who are trying to decide what colleges they’ll attend in the fall. Kelly and I agreed that most colleges will probably have a lower admissions rate in the fall. Who would want to start classes at a time like this, when we still don’t even know if we’ll be having in-person classes in the fall? Who could afford to start college at a time like this? At one point a family came and walked by the pond. Our picnic blanket was nestled in the grass, between the upper two rows of stone bleachers that encircle the back side of the reservoir. For whatever reason the mother thought it would be a fine idea to walk along one of the rows bordering our setup. It seemed extraordinarily unnecessary given that she has the whole entire campus to walk about. What happened to a six-foot minimum? Retrospectively, I really wish that I had forced myself into a coughing fit as she passed. Some people clearly just have no respect for personal space. After our picnic we walked to the back of the arboretum. There was the occasional jogger or couple walking by, but for the most part things were fairly quiet. It’s weird to think how bustling things would have been given the weather - under normal circumstances that is. There was no fighting for tree real estate today. We stretched out between two leafless trees on the edge of �the ravines. The sun easily cut through the canopy of bare branches. It was nice to just lay there in the sun for a good hour. I really should start studying outside more often. 4/3/2020; 9:39PM Do you ever have a day that is both a good day and a bad day at the same time? Today is one of those days for me. It began with an exam. Normally that isn't a good start to a college student’s day but in this case the exam was in biochemistry - a subject that I have always excelled in - and it was open-book, meaning it had to be easier than ever right? Well, I don’t have my score back yet so time will only tell as to whether that’s true. The exam was from 9-11am, so mostly it was a good note in my day because I was glad to have it over so early. I was supposed to have a self-reflection meeting with my leadership academy from 1-4pm today, but truthfully I played hooky. Self-reflection events have always been something I enjoyed because they’re generally really enlightening, in addition to having free food and an opportunity to socialize with my fellow candidates. But the thought of engaging in such an intimate ritual via zoom seemed alien. Also, it’s pretty easy to rationalize skipping class or an event when “skipping” only means not opening my computer. So instead I called in sick and we went on a hike. I was nervous initially about the idea of heading to Rosy Mound. Earlier in the morning, I came across a Facebook post by Ottawa County Parks’ that requested hikers steer clear of lakeside parks because they had been notoriously busy in the past few weeks - an environment that isn’t too congruent with social distancing. We debated visiting other parks instead, but ultimately conceded that no matter where we went on such a nice day, it was hard to predict the level of foot-traffic. The hike ended up being a nice escape. We climbed many stairs, sticking close to the side of the path, our heads turned, whenever another party passed. Some people reciprocated our attempts at keeping a distance, while others plowed through the middle of the path, unperturbed by us clinging to the sides. After reaching the top, we ended up picnicking in the refuge of a solitary dune off the lake. Thankfully nobody bothered us there. That was the good of the day. The bad started a few hours after collapsing into bed, exhausted from our hike. One of my roommates who had moved home returned to pick up some extra things. No big deal. Except another one had also come back and was now doing her laundry downstairs. It frustrated me that as hard as we had tried to isolate ourselves for the past week, sacrificing time with friends we so wished to have, my roommates had now come meandering back through the house after spending time interacting with only god knows who. I had specifically asked them, multiple times, to just text me when they were coming back, if only so I knew who was in the house, but apparently that was too difficult a request. �Since then various rotten things continued to go wrong with my day - one of my roommates broke a glass, she took my vacuum when I needed to use it, my girlfriend accidentally spilled a full drink (with the last of my quarantine vodka) all over the carpet… Even saying this now it seems silly how upset I’ve been by all that’s happened. I guess when you’re cooped up all day and all you have is the little things it’s easier for the little things to get to you when they go wrong. 4/7/2020; 12:05PM Things are looking more and more ominous in regards to the severity of this public health crisis and with that more chaotic. I have been checking the Kent County public health website daily for updates on numbers. We are now at around 177 positive tests, which means realistically there are probably a lOT more positive case than that since 1) some people are asymptomatic 2) other people have mild cases that may as well be a cold (like any ol’ coronavirus) and 3) they are only testing people who are severe anyways! Public health recommendations are also a mess. Within the past couple weeks, the CDC has gone from telling people to only wear masks if they’re caring for someone who is sick, to saying that everyone should be wearing masks in public as a precaution. My parents tried to order masks off Amazon, but what would normally require 2-day shipping isn’t set to arrive until May. Some people are making their own cloth masks, but I don’t have the fabric, much less a sewing machine. My aunt, who works as a nurse at Bronson, is supposedly making masks for my family. My mom says she would send us some if they got extra, but I don’t know how likely that is at this point. We haven’t been to the grocery store yet and Kelly says she doesn’t want to wear a mask anyways because last time we went, we thought the few younger people who were wearing them looked stupid. I think public perception has changed now that the recommendations have flipped. In my spare time I’ve been reading and listening to podcasts. One of the podcasts I’ve always liked is called Sawbones, it’s a comic medical history show and one of the hosts is a family physician. In the past few episodes they’ve been talking about the COVID19 epidemic. It’s wild to think about how quickly this went from being overblow to scary. I remember listening to their first episode on COVID19 on the plane ride down to Florida for spring break. Even physicians were being optimistic, warning people not to panic and saying that this would likely only have an impact on countries like China, who are often hit hard by these kinds of outbreaks due to the overall poor respiratory health of their country. Two weeks later they came out with a follow up episode talking about how physicians were setting up decontamination stations in their garage to avoid infecting patients and begging people to stay inside. I can only imagine what people outside of the US are thinking about this situation. Probably the same way we have always looked at China through epidemics like SARS, thinking “Wow, it must suck to be in a country with such poorly established public health measures. I’m glad that could never happen here”. I think living through this has definitely made me realize the false sense of security that living in a �wealthy, developed nation can provide. Clearly we aren’t as separated from the world’s problems as one would like to think. Heck in this case, we, are “the world’s problems”. 4/13/2020 6:30pm Today I found out my summer internship program has been cancelled due to COVID19. While I always knew this was a possibility, it was still a huge blow. The research program was supposed to be my “in” to my top MD/PhD program. They bring you in for a summer, house you and pay you to do research, while at the same time you get to attend seminars by graduate students and talk to admissions counselors about applying. It’s essentially a 2-month long interview for them - or so my advisor told me. Well after receiving the news via email and briefly going through all 7 stages of grief, I shot out a desperate email to the PI I was supposed to be working under. I told her about the program being cancelled. “I know this may be a stretch, but are you aware of any other sources of funding that would still allow me to work in your lab over the summer?” I frantically emailed my supervisor at the library, maybe I can still continue working my current job?? I also emailed a few other contacts that one of my advisors had sent me, but I wasn’t holding my breath - it seemed like everyone was too busy doing damage control and nobody had jobs to offer right now. Then my email pinged a response - it was from the PI. “That is too bad. I’m happy to fund you to work in our lab – so, no worries.” Just like that, things were fixed (I think??). I have a phone meeting with her tomorrow to talk over details, but I’m still nervous about all the undetermined variables. It’s so hard to plan anything now because this pandemic is so unpredictable. I’m worried that even if I miraculously am still able to set up a job in this lab, our state could have its lockdown extended or their state could implement one or the hospital could shut down that research project. I’m having trouble coping with the uncertainty of it all. �4/16/2020 12:51 pm My partner moved out this morning. She’s going back to live with her roommates. Tomorrow, I will be heading back to stay with my parents for a couple of weeks - or as long as I can manage. Things have not been great for either of us, mental health-wise. The weather has been snowy and cold and windy and I haven’t left the house in probably two weeks. It’s depressing to say the least. We tried to mix it up. To roast marshmallows over our grill outside and have sushi picnics in the living room. But it’s hard to be trapped in a small apartment with the same person day in and day out, with no distinct purpose. Sure, I have school work right now, but even the courses I normally enjoy seem to drag. I no longer have any motivation to be productive. I only feel lethargic and empty. So we decided we both needed a change of scenery. Honestly, I almost wish we had decided to do this sooner. Things were strange and tense in the past few days. We both knew each of us wanted to be somewhere else. It’s hard to be with a person you’re supposed to love and only want to be somewhere else. The stress over thinking about what this could do to our relationship has not helped. I just hope we can both bounce back from this weird depression. I can feel myself sinking into a place of loneliness and mourning that I haven’t been in a while and I only hope that I can pull through finals. Even though my classes are mostly done - two of my finals were switched to take-home exams and I’m hardly concerned about those, I still feel as though I’m drowning in responsibilities. The leadership academy I’m in asked us to record 30 second videos of ourselves congratulating graduating seniors in place of the normal banquet we have. My research professor asked me to write up methods and results for our experiments from the past fall since I can’t do anything else in the lab. I don’t feel I have the energy to tackle either of these tasks. I am nervous about heading home. From what I’ve heard, my parent’s house hasn’t been the most hospitable of environments as of late. My mother has taken to obsessively reading all of the doom-and-gloom news and my younger sister - well she’s always been capricious. Normally she attends a day program for special needs adults, but she’s been home since the public schools were all closed. I get the sense that she has no real structure to her day anymore and apparently her fits have only been getting worse. Normally when I visit home we share a room, so this is moderately concerning. Nothing I haven’t handled before, but still I’m worried that the environment will only increase my stress load. Then again, my other option is to spend another few weeks wallowing within the same four walls - now alone. And that is not something I think I can take for a moment longer. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-04-19_ANON-029 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Anonymous Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-04-19 Title A name given to the resource Anonymous COVID-19 Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of an anonymous GVSU student's experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/89121350956e19449a4a6cf3d60c4433.pdf 6c979ca3886396a56e6072f153ac0876 PDF Text Text Jodilyn Jenkins Prompts Did you move off campus suddenly due to COVID-19? What was that experience like, what kind of help did you have? Do you still have personal belongings on campus? 04/01/20 On Tuesday, March 10, 2020, I drove twenty minutes from Grand Valley State University to my hometown, Grandville, to vote. I stopped by my house and ate dinner with my younger siblings and parents, then waved goodbye and told them I would see them in a month or so. Maybe I would come home for Easter. Even though I lived so close to campus, I didn’t go home very frequently. But I was about to be back home much sooner than planned - a lot can happen in 24 hours. The next morning, the atmosphere around campus and in classes had shifted. People, myself included, were paying close attention to the news and watching as colleges and universities began closing in an attempt to slow the spread of COVID-19. I wasn’t caught completely off guard; I had been following the spread of the virus quite closely, as my hostbrother is from China and was concerned about his parents. I knew that the new cases of the coronavirus kept popping up, and that many more cases were probably left undiagnosed. It still felt strange how quickly everyone’s attitudes changed once they started realizing that this global pandemic would have very real, close-to-home impacts. I got back from my run with a few other girls from the running club that Wednesday evening, and as we were stretching and casually talking, someone opened their email and read the letter sent out to all Grand Valley students, staff, and faculty: school would be closing and students living on campus were recommended to leave as soon as possible. All attempts at stretching were abandoned - the indoor track was bursting with storytelling and shouting and nervous laughing. The sprinters and distance runners even started talking to one another. That night I said goodbye to my “freshmen squad” (we chose to tap feet instead of hug), and I realized I probably wouldn’t see them for a while. I called up my brother and we decided to pack up and leave that night. I could have stayed an extra day, but there was one silent reason I was happy to be headed home: I hadn’t slept for a few nights in a row, and had gotten an average of three hours of sleep a night for the past weeks. I was struggling with insomnia, and sleeping at home seemed to help slightly. I packed quickly and messily, throwing clothes into bags and tossing school books into my backpack. I craved some sleep, even though I knew that was a pretty narrow-minded and selfish reason for feeling relief to be headed home. I picked up my brother, Ben, from his dorm. Ben’s friend, Finn also came with us, as he planned to stay at our house for a few days until he could find a ride to his home in Eastern Michigan. Our tiny car was jam packed with bags, which showed what was left unspoken between the three of us: even though school had technically only shut down for twenty days, we knew it wasn’t likely we would be back. Throwing all of our things into the car that night was a strange feeling. There were people carrying laundry baskets and suitcases out of their dorm rooms. The campus roads were lined with cars. People were moving. Everyone was jittery and anxious. When I got home, �the jitteriness and anxiety stayed with me that night and didn’t give my insomnia a break. Although I assume even people without insomnia weren’t sleeping well that night. The next morning, I drove back to Grand Valley and rescued my plant (lovingly named Ursula). I didn’t want her dying! More importantly, I picked up necessary medication that Finn had left in the refrigerator in the dorm kitchen. While picking up his medicine, I ran into my good friend Bri, a girl on the running club who I ran with and ate dinner with every day, including the night before. Bri had already told me she did not plan on coming back to Grand Valley the next semester. She lived in a single parent home with many siblings, and the cost of Grand Valley was just too high. It was then when I realized I probably wouldn’t see much of Bri again. I had spent my last day in the running club with her. I had eaten one last dinner in the cafeteria with her. “No, Jodi, don’t you worry, I’ll be seeing you in two weeks!” she shouted before shutting her car door and driving away. I laughed. I wished I had her confidence. I glanced at the window to my dorm, glad I had said goodbye to my roommates last night. Finally, I bought a bag full of granola bars from the convenience store on campus, figuring I should get the most of my meal plan. I drove home, gave Finn his medicine and plopped down in my room, unpacked bags surrounding the floor. My sister came into my room, smiling and singing that she was happy I was back so soon. “On Tuesday you said you wouldn’t see me for a while, and now here you are! How crazy is that?” She couldn’t quite wrap her eleven year old mind around the seriousness of the whole situation. “You’re right,” I agreed, “pretty crazy.” How are your online classes going? What kinds of messages have you received from professors? How are other students handling the changes? How are you handling it? Are you involved in student organizations, sports or clubs? How has COVID-19 and campus response affected those? What is happening in your daily life at home? How are your parents/friends/partners/etc. doing? 04/03/20 During the first week of online classes, my average day was spent behind a computer, at the dinner table to take a break and eat a meal, then finishing more work on the computer and heading to sleep. I have never been busier with assignments and video calls, and my inbox has never been fuller. After the chaos of that first week died down, I began to fall more into a routine. I wake up around eight in the morning, do a few hours of school each day, leave time to help my younger sister with her elementary school work or to play outside with her, do another hour of homework, and make sure to run. I don’t run because I think it’s good for me, or I am trying to get in shape, I run because that’s what I have been doing for the past five years, so it’s one thing that feels consistent. I have control over it. I may not have control over how certain family members are interacting with each other, or over how the nation feels more divided than �ever, or how the government is handling this global pandemic, but when I am running, I decide how fast to move my legs, how far they will take me, and where I will go. I know a racing heart and difficult breathing are symptoms of anxiety - something I only struggle with when trying to sleep - but when I run my heart rate can increase and my breath can quicken and my body allows it all to feel natural. So I keep it in the routine. I also try to connect with a few friends each day, whether through a quick text or a video call. My family is also adjusting to this new “routine,” but in many different ways. My mom, a biology professor at Grand Valley, wakes up early and films videos on mitosis and meiosis and transcription and translation and then attempts online office hours. She has set up a card table in her room and a “do not disturb” sign on the door, which is perfectly reasonable, as there are seven other people roaming around our one-story house. My dad, an administrator at an elementary school, also uses the card table to run his meetings, interviews and phone calls, and whatever other business administrators attend to. My two brothers are back home from university as well, and are adjusting to online learning. Like me, they are both freshmen in college. Yes, we are triplets. No, we are not identical, and if that was the first thought that crossed your mind, I would suggest popping in on my mom’s video class for a quick lesson in biology. Anyways, Ben also attends Grand Valley, and seems to be adjusting very well (he is a computer science major and is having no difficulty dealing with technology), but Chris, on the other hand, attends a small school in Indiana and is a music education major. The majority of his classes are music lessons, usually accompanied with other instruments. The switch to online learning has been more of a challenge for him, but I am happy to hear our house ringing with music again, whether it’s the powerful piano, the squeaky violin he is trying to learn, or (his favorite) the confident and swinging saxophone. To be honest, I am not very pleased with the violin, but it felt rude to leave out. My host-brother, John, is a senior in high school and also switching to online learning. His parents live in China, and he has been caught up with all the coronavirus news before anyone in West Michigan was even talking about it. John moved in with my family the same exact day Ben and I moved out to live on campus at Grand Valley, and was planning on going home before Ben and I returned. It wasn’t until the night Ben and I drove back that we realized we did not have enough beds in our house for everyone! Ben cleaned out and dusted the closet under the stairs and has been sleeping there, much to my mother’s concern about his allergies. My two younger siblings, Nathan and Faith, are also starting online learning. Nathan is a freshman in high school, and Faith is a 5th grader. Nathan sleeps in and does as little work as possible to achieve a high grade. He seems to have “natural intelligence” and can get away with it. Online learning is more of a challenge, however, for a 5th grader. I am impressed with Faith’s teacher, who is providing worksheets and books to read. But the school can hardly expect every student to have a computer, especially if that student is eleven years old. Faith does what she can, but with a learning disability in math and a mother who is practically a mathematician and certainly not blessed with the patience of an elementary school teacher, Faith’s daily routine usually ends with a door slam and crying. To add to the noise, the family dog recently recovered from pancreatitis, and now has the energy of his puppy days, barking nonstop at every person who walks by - and given that there isn’t much else to do except take a walk, there are a lot of families who walk by. I love my noisy home. It is not very big, it has fights (with eight stubborn people under one roof, that’s no �surprise), it runs out of hundreds of dollars worth of groceries in a day, but it is home. I love the people around me, and my neighborhood has some wonderful neighbors. I know that with the “stay in shelter” order that is necessary right now, many people are returning to abusive homes, or homes without food, or homes that cannot even be called a home at all. Even though living this new routine feels strange to me, and I know I should be back on campus, and nothing feels “ideal” right now, I know I am fortunate to feel safe and loved where I live. Do/did you have a job on or off campus? What kind of work did you do, and how has that been affected by COVID-19, lock-downs, and quarantine? Are you or anyone you know sick? What symptoms, response from medical personnel? Getting COVID testing? 04/03/2020 No one I know has tested positive for COVID so far. However, I have a feeling that my uncle had the coronavirus, but it went undetected. He flew to L.A. to visit a good friend about a week and a half before Grand Valley went into online learning. I visited him over my spring break, and he seemed to be in great health, but a few days later, he came down with an awful fever and a cough. He wasn’t in bad enough shape to have to be admitted to a hospital, but with his travel to California, and the fact that he rarely catches the common cold, he was suspicious that he had COVID. He wanted to get tested because when I had visited him, my grandparents had come with me. He had hugged them and exposed them to whatever germs he was fighting. He called multiple hospitals and doctor’s offices, but could not get a test. He has since recovered, and neither my grandparents nor I came down with any symptoms. My grandma, never one for long phone calls, called me up and told me and the rest of my cousins that we shouldn’t come visit, because “if either me or your grandpa gets sick, we’ll both be goners,” then proceeded to hang up the phone. I have had the chance to video call my grandparents, and they (thankfully) are taking the “stay home, stay safe” order very seriously. They are having groceries delivered to their front door, and using gloves to get the mail. My grandma is working on sewing masks that she could donate to hospitals and my grandpa is taking the time at home to learn a new skill that he hadn’t practiced much in all 79 years of his life: cooking. He told all of this to me in an email, the only form of “social media” my grandparents have. I am extremely grateful for their health. It does feel strange, though, a bit like I’m leaning over an edge and waiting for the fall that hasn’t yet come. Everyone I know is healthy, in comparison to other counties, Kent County, where I live, doesn’t have a huge sickness or death rate. Everyone is outside enjoying the nice weather, staying six feet away from neighbors, calling friends, stressing about work and jobs and how to manage with no paycheck, and all wondering: when is it going to hit? And I’m sitting on the floor of my room, sun shining through my window, typing out my thoughts, waiting right along with everyone else. 04/04/2020 �I Could Use A Kate Hug Right About Now We have an “I’m happy to see you” hug, An “I love you so much” hug, A “laughing too hard and need someone to lean on” hug, A “before a nerve wracking event” hug, An “after it’s all over” hug, An “it’s going to be okay” hug, An “I’m so proud of you” hug, An “I will cry with you” hug, A “you are so strong” hug, An “I don’t want to say goodbye” hug. I miss them all. So promise me, when this is all over, To hug me for a very very very long time. I am a hugger. I hugged one of my best friends, my roommate, goodbye almost a month ago, when we packed up our things from our dorm room and headed home. She lives less than ten miles away from me, and I have been to her dad’s apartment to drop off a few things. I stood in the doorway and we talked, but made sure to not get too close. On March 21, I ran with three girls I went to high school with. One of the girls, Kate, is another big hugger, just like me. Even though it is fairly easy to stay six feet away while running, that day was the last day I ran with her (or anyone) because we decided it was safer and more responsible to run alone. We ran ten miles that day, down a wide trail, and at some point one of the girls stopped to use the bathroom. As we were waiting, Kate, standing at the opposite end of the trail, looked up at me and asked, “how are you?” I shrugged my shoulders. “I am just okay.” She hugged the air and I did the same, wrapping our arms around our own shoulders. That would have to do for now. It seems selfish and ignorant of me to be writing about a hug right now, when there are a million problems that are worse and I am in an extremely privileged position. But if this writing is ever going to be read in the future by anyone other than myself (which is far-fetched, but an exciting idea nonetheless) then my advice - no matter the situation, or where you live, or what you believe - is to show appreciation and love to the people who mean the most to you. Does it sound naive of me to say? Yes. If anyone is reading this, are their eyes rolling into the back of their head? Probably. I don’t care. I write for myself, so I’m going to go ahead and take my own advice. 04/08/2020 Fragments of the world are calm, in a lull. Kids draw chalk hopscotch courts, hearts, and rainbows on driveways. �Families ride bikes down quiet roads. Neighbors wave and stop on sidewalks to talk. Dogs receive more walks than ever before. Runners, both new and old, fill the trails. Grandchildren sit on their decks calling grandparents. People of all ages read in hammocks, Lounge in porch chairs, And enjoy the sun. I stay outside, journaling in the grass. When I go inside, the constant news updates, The political arguments, The sewing of masks, The “I miss you” texts, And the bombardment of emails Remind me that peace is not as present as it may seem; Remind me that I am not living in a springtime out of a storybook. But at least I have the fragments. I walked the dog this afternoon with my mom, something I did everyday when I lived at home. Now that I’m living with her again, it's a habit I picked right back up. Walking is a habit many people have adopted nowadays. I don’t live in a crowded city, in fact, it’s quite the opposite, I live in a very small, quiet town, so walking outside is not a health concern. I never knew such a small town could hold so many people. I see new dogs, new bikers, and new runners every day. The sun has come out and people are itching to get outside. “It is almost like the perfect spring day with a perfect small town feeling, you know what I mean?” my mom asked as we walked. I knew exactly what she meant. Everyone was smiling, waving, acting more neighborly and polite than ever. Almost perfect. Selfishly, I wonder when I can drive to my best friend’s house and throw myself on her couch again, when I can drive to the beach with no empty seats in my car, if I’ll sit around a bonfire this year with a group of friends - not six feet away - intertwining legs and holding hands. On a more serious note, and a more pressing note, I anxiously wonder if my grandparents will stay safe, if my brother with intense asthma will return to his job at UPS this summer, if my friend in Detroit is staying healthy (and sane) taking care of her younger sisters while her mom works at a packed hospital, if the death rates around the globe will begin to decrease, or if the nation will ever mend its political divide. I never thought I hated the unknown. But I am learning that I hate the unknown only when it was once known and is known uncertain. And those are the thoughts of an 18 year old girl on a walk with her dog this particular “almost perfect” Wednesday in April. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-04-08_JenkinsJodilyn Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Jenkins, Jodilyn Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-04-08 Title A name given to the resource Jodilyn Jenkins Journal Description An account of the resource Journal of GVSU student Jodilyn Jenkins of her experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/d3513b1cd1e00ebc14ea8acd6686113e.pdf 6946b73cac41c4a194ed8b182d6fb732 PDF Text Text Emily Buettner 3/3/2020 Time feels as if it carries an entirely different weight with it now. The days are long yet heavy, with more and more happening to those close to me everyday. Over two weeks ago I began this pandemic in a hospital room with my Grandmother. The previous weekend my Grandmother had been admitted to the hospital for colon cancer, the second time she has had to face cancer in her life. One of her favorite game shows, The Price is Right, echoed through the speakers on her hospital bed as I talked to the nurse taking care of her. He was a grand valley state university student, and from him I learned that the university was going to be potentially closed. At the moment I honestly believed nothing was going to happen. However, later that night as I prepared to head back to my apartment the notice came out about the University shutting down for the next two weeks. I remember mainly feeling surprised, but also worried for what was to come. Within the next couple of days the hospital my Grandmother was at began restricting the number of visitors who could enter a room at a time. I remember this being the first time I directly felt the effects of the pandemic. I was worried about carrying a disease to my vulnerable Grandmother, and being the reason she would never be able to make a recovery. My roommates chose to worry about how to have a good time instead. While my roommates worried about what outfit to wear to their next day party, I had to worry about them bringing any number of diseases ranging from COVID, the flu, or strep back to the apartment. Because of my living situation at the time, and being able to choose to go home as my mom was in the area, I decided to leave. Over the past two weeks I left my apartment to move back home with my family in Virginia. Me and my mom were able to fly out of Grand Rapids and went through the Chicago airport in order to get home. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-03-30_BuettnerEmily Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Buettner, Emily Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-03-30 Title A name given to the resource Emily Buettner Journal Description An account of the resource Journal entry of GVSU student Emily Beuttner shortly before the university closed due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/c1822e27fda11a105afc21c5a3e5a09d.pdf 2589e33c85cf6ea9c25a7989eafd1bc2 PDF Text Text Day 114 by windoworks As my friend said to me today: Pamela, you are living the virus. Yesterday in Michigan, where we have endured months of behaving ourselves and following the Governor’s instructions, the number of virus cases rose by 543 in one day as opposed to under 100 a day in the middle of June. In Kent County there were 107 new cases yesterday. The day before there were 30+ new cases. So here I am, living the virus. I watched Andrew Cuomo, Governor of New York State talk this morning. He is famous for his one liners. This morning he said ‘reality always wins’. He was referring to Chump’s refusal to face any sort of fact about the virus. Governor Cuomo also said some weeks ago ‘the other choice is death’. Hawaii has mandated quarantine for tourists and if you don’t comply, you face a $5000 fine or a 12 month jail sentence. New York State says any visitor who doesn’t quarantine will be fined up to $10,000. MiamiDade County in Florida had instituted a curfew beginning tonight. Beaches are closed in a number of coastal states. �And here we are again: In Arizona, where the virus appears to be spreading out of control, hospitals rushed to expand capacity and adopted practices similar to those employed at the height of the outbreak in New York City and Italy, including doubling up hospital beds in rooms, pausing elective surgeries and bringing in health-care workers from other states. �Perhaps most chillingly, at the urging of doctors and advisers, state officials this week activated “crisis standards of care” protocols, which determine for hospitals which patients get ventilators and care as the system becomes overwhelmed under the crush of patients. “I think it’s pretty obvious that we are not going in the right direction,” Anthony S. Fauci, the country’s top infectious-disease expert, said during a YouTube live stream. Although people are asking to be tested, once again there seem to be shortages of test kits and the accompanying paraphernalia. At the same time, laboratories are running out of test reagents as well as being simply overwhelmed by the rush. From Sydney, Australia: in Balmain where Zoe and Oliver live, their local grocery store, Woolworths, was closed for deep cleaning and restaffing after one store worker tested positive. Disturbingly, he tested positive several weeks after recovering from his initial bout of Covid-19. Accordingly (with many others) Zoe lined up to be tested again. She and Oliver had planned to visit his great grandmother in Canberra this weekend, and she needed to know if she was infected. Zoe reported there was a long line of cars and when the nurse asked her why she was being tested she replied: I live in Balmain. And the nurse replied: Ah, Woolworths. The nurse then scraped both sides of Zoe’s throat ad well as both nostrils - a change from the previous test when the nurse had scraped one side of Zoe’s throat and one nostril. Fortunately the test came back negative and Zoe and Oliver can safely visit my mother-in-law. But here’s something cheery: In El Cajon, Calif., a procession of cars carrying 600 soon-to-be U.S. citizens from 68 countries passed through a series of stations behind a local community center earlier this week, where they were asked a series of final questions: "Any coronavirus symptoms? Have you been arrested since your interview? No tickets, nothing like that?" After that, they were asked to surrender their green card and given a small American flag. Driving a little farther forward, an immigration officer wearing a face cover administered the oath of allegiance, 6 feet from the car's window. And in a matter of minutes, years of uncertainty were over — hundreds of people became U.S. citizens over the course of the day. Yay! I remember our ceremony from 10 years ago and what a thrill that was. At the end of the drivethrough ceremony (above), the immigration officer then said to each new citizen: congratulations! Welcome to America. On the reverse side, here is something scary: �Russian voters passed a referendum allowing President Vladimir Putin to remain in office until 2036. Vladimir Putin is 67 years old, by 2036 he will be 83 years old, if he is still alive. The referendum contained 200 amendments. 200! Just remember, Chump adores Putin. And just to cheer us all up, from John Lennon: Imagine there's no heaven It's easy if you try No hell below us Above us only sky Imagine all the people living for today Imagine there's no countries It isn't hard to do Nothing to kill or die for And no religion too Imagine all the people living life in peace. You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope some day you'll join us And the world will be as one Imagine no possessions I wonder if you can No need for greed or hunger A brotherhood of man Imagine all the people sharing all the world. Under the heading: Let sleeping dogs lie - ��French President Emmanuel Macron and British Prime Minister Boris Johnson greeted each other with waves and thumbs up this week. Even the elbow bump with which Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders opened their mid-March debate is a thing of the past. Forget handshakes or hugs. And gestures aren’t the only rituals learned over a lifetime that have been adapted in mere months since the novel coronavirus began changing the world. A quick shout out to my niece Elle Benjamin in Cornwall, England. As she has returned to her office job part time, she has taken up crafting in her spare time and is concentrating on weaving wall hangings. She is also a wonderful potter. This month she is making Christmas decorations for a booth she hopes to have at a nearby Christmas Market in December. You can see her stuff at: completeanduttercraft on Instagram. I have purchased 3 items from her already. She has a PayPal account that is easy to deal with. Check out her site. By the way, she made 33 cloud rainbow window hangings. They are all over the world as well as locally and she donated half the profits to the National Health Service. Oliver. If the video was too big yesterday, I apologize and I will just post photos until I figure video posting out better. Here he is at daycare surrounded by his team. You’ve gotta laugh. ��Flashback: on our way into Edinburgh we visited Rosslyn Chapel. The building was begun in 1456 and of course at that time it was a Catholic Church. In 1861 it became a Scottish Episcopal Church. The really interesting thing about this chapel is the speculative theories about a connection with the Knights Templar and the Holy Grail and Freemasonry. It was prominently featured in Dan Brown’s novel The Da Vinci Code (2003) and the film adaption in 2006. Sadly medieval historians say these accounts have no basis in fact. However, the church has gained an impressive amount of tourists visiting, who all come to see the crypt featured in the film. ����From the top: me outside the church looking at the extensive carvings; Asher outside; the church is famous for its carvings, both inside and out but the ones outside have suffered greatly from weather and pollution; lastly a photo from the crypt - I’m not sure of it’s significance. Broadway will remain shuttered until at least January. But if you subscribe to Disney+,from tonight you can watch the complete stage performance of Hamilton featuring the original cast. Simon says; put your mask on. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-03_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-114 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-03 Title A name given to the resource Day 114 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/b43b777fa8bdf37d2617aa00b2454163.pdf 5547f3d9c194d315753ed0f37b31a636 PDF Text Text Respond to this post by replying above this line New post on Stuff Day 113 by windoworks ��This is Gretchen. She’s got our backs. She talks to us every week and tells us exactly what’s going on in Michigan. She surrounds herself with experts who all have the opportunity to speak and be heard. This is what a leader looks like. Yesterday, Gretchen did this: The rest of the article stated that take out cocktails would be allowed. Another restaurant near us closed on Tuesday because a staff member tested positive. You have to wonder (a) how did the staff member become infected and (b) how many times can this happen before a restaurant or bar closes permanently? “We shouldn’t presume that a group of experts somehow knows what’s best,” Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) said during Fauci's appearance before the Senate health committee. �What is wrong with this statement from a prominent Republican Senator? I know there’s something....... The Women’s City Club has organized a Lets Do Picnic Lunch at a nearby park, and I have to tell you, I’m a bit nervous about it. I know we’ll all have masks and disinfectant and we’ll sit far apart but even so, its scary. In part of the video of the reporter in a Houston hospital that I told you about yesterday, the reporter interviewed the owner of 2 bars that had to close. He asked him: how do you think you got the virus? And the bar owner (60-70 year old) said: it might have been the hugs or the kisses or the handshakes, I don’t know. I’ll just let that sink in. Here is one of the lions that guard the entrance to the New York Public Library. We have a house around the corner from us that has a pair of lions guarding their doorway and for months now they have been masked up. In the ‘well at least they told us straightaway’ catgeory: Chinese researchers announced the discovery of a new strain of swine flu among workers at a slaughterhouse and warned it should be monitored in case human-to-human transmission starts. �Is this the point at which I lie on the floor and moan? That pretty much sums it up for Craig and 3 of our neighbors, as well as all their colleagues. Should be easy, right? And this one has that very bad word, but I’m posting it anyway. ��Well this seems sensible: Half of the entire workforce is now working remotely (that’s right, half), and many companies believe it makes economic sense to keep it going — pandemic or not. No more wasted time or money on commuting. Workers can live where they want. Companies save money by not paying for commercial real estate, which is insanely expensive in places like Boston, New York City and Silicon Valley. Virtual offices mean companies can tap into an unlimited labor pool for recruiting. Plus, one expert says the teleworking shift is pushing companies to focus on performance and output as opposed to just clocking hours. Here’s my question: what’s going to happen to all those high rise office buildings that are downtown in every large city? Yesterday we drove past Monroe Plaza (which had the most number of smashed windows after the demonstration) and it was closed to all cars. Instead it had colored umbrellas and tables and chairs and there seemed to be people sitting and eating and relaxing in the gorgeous day. It’s one of the temporary social zones and I really hope they make it a permanent one. And this really sums it up for Craig and I: This next item is good to know but - scary. Medical experts say autopsies are becoming a critical source of information on coronavirus as scientists race to understand it. Autopsies have confirmed that the virus does attack the lungs with the most ferocity. But the pathogen was also found in the kidneys, liver and the brain, where some damage could be permanent in survivors.Dissecting 38 brains,87 lungs and 42 hearts of people who died from Covid19 revealed surprising and alarming results. (You’ll need to look online to find those results) This just in: Los Angeles County has ordered all beaches to close over the Fourth of July weekend after reporting its highest single-day number of new cases on Monday. But L.A. County Sheriff Alex Villanueva said he does not plan to enforce the order. You have to ask yourself: why wouldn’t he enforce the order? Lazy? Too hard? Virus is a hoax Or, Chump fan? So I FINALLY figured out how to load a video on to this blogpost. Wait for the smile at the end. Craig is very excited. He sees a drum kit in Oliver’s future. �Flashback: our last visit to Hadrian’s Wall. ���We visited Walltown Crags which is considered one of the best places to see Hadrian’ s Wall as it snakes through the countryside along the crags of the Whin Sill. It is one of the most preserved pieces of the Wall. Asher was very excited by all our Wall days. He stood on the top of it at one place and declared loudly ‘Winter is coming!’ - and unless you were a Game of Thrones fan, you would have no idea what he was talking about. The Wall was an amazing experience. I know I use that word a lot, but it was such an experience to look at a long wall that stretched across Britain and did a decent job of keeping the Picts out. As I write this today, I am so grateful for all the traveling Craig and I have been able to do. As my motherin-law says: the photos remind you of experiences you have had. It may be a long time until Craig and I are able to travel again - and as Americans we are not welcome in Europe or, I suspect, Australia and New Zealand at this time. Our photos of previous times are therefore doubly precious. Further north tomorrow. �Remember to vote! November 3 is 123 days away. Vote Blue, from the bottom to the top. Mark it on your calendar. In Michigan you can vote absentee - its ridiculously easy. No excuses - just vote! � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-02_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-113 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-02 Title A name given to the resource Day 113 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/1c6788efe3e394efdfdcba827a7dcedc.pdf 170dc51e9f4a91121ac071560ab97d29 PDF Text Text Day 112. by windoworks This morning is overwhelming. Firstly, I watched Joe Biden give a speech. When he said the words: every store should have a big sticker on the door that says: Safe For Shopping, I cried. As he talked about the steps that should have been taken by the administration, I cried. As he acknowledged the huge sacrifices that Americans have made by staying home and staying safe, while the President did NOTHING to help, I cried. When he acknowledged how frightened and anxious we all are, I cried. Oh how different this would have been if Hillary had won. I look at Jacinda in New Zealand and Angela in Germany and I wonder if those citizens know just how lucky they are. And then I watched a CNN report form a hospital In Houston, Texas where the reporter and the cameraman were allowed into the Coronavirus Wing (the Coronavirus Wing!) through the zippered negative air seal door to see the patients being treated. The journalist was dressed in 3 protective layers, from head to foot. The head doctor has been working for 100 days straight. They had so much protective gear on you couldn’t tell if they were a male or female, but each staff member wore a large laminated photograph of themselves around their neck for the patients to see who they were. The doctor said he is treating people in a completely different way to 2 months ago, never mind 4 months ago. His recovery rate is 98%, which is fantastic, but if the numbers continue to surge, they won’t have the beds to accommodate the patients. The reporter then said: look behind me. There was a long line of cars stretching into the distance, waiting to be tested - and they had begun lining up at 1am. I feel like a front line reporter, just behind the battle lines. There is only one way to get out of this mess and unfortunately, we can’t affect a change until November 3. We need a new leader who actually leads. There is so much disparaging stuff said about Joe Biden, but he is stepping up and offering solutions and reassurances and I am impressed by his ‘steady hand on the wheel’ stance. �There’s a novel concept: actually listening to the experts! As I write this, there is a plumber in our basement trying to find out why there is s growing pool of contaminated water coming up the drain. I’ve heard of this happening to other friends but not us. I am safely upstairs, sitting in bed, writing this blog. There are some days I can’t believe my life. Breaking: Anthony S. Fauci, the nation’s top infectious-diseases expert, gave a dire warning Tuesday in a Senate committee hearing held as coronavirus infections surge in many parts of the United States. �“We are now having 40-plus thousand new cases a day. I would not be surprised if we go up to 100,000 a day if this does not turn around. And so I am very concerned,” Fauci said in response to questioning from Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.) on what the overall U.S. death toll is likely to be. Fauci testified alongside Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Director Robert Redfield; Food and Drug Administration Commissioner Stephen Hahn; and Brett Giroir, assistant secretary for health at the Department of Health and Human Services, before the Senate’s health committee hearing meant to focus on safely reopening schools and businesses. And this: A top doctor at the CDC said the U.S. has “way too much virus” to control it. “We’re not in the situation of New Zealand or Singapore or Korea where a new case is rapidly identified and all the contacts are traced and people are isolated who are sick and people who are exposed are quarantined and they can keep things under control,” Anne Schuchat, principal deputy director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said in an interview with the Journal of the American Medical Association’s Howard Bauchner. "We have way too much virus across the country for that right now, so it’s very discouraging. … This is really the beginning. But while the Democrats in both houses are listening, no one is listening in the White House. They’re too busy planning rallies and that big fireworks display I told you about. Because getting Chump reelected is more important than anything. And this just in from the European Union: It’s official: the EU says Americans are persona non grata. U.S. travelers won't be among those allowed to visit the European Union when the bloc begins opening its external borders on July 1. EU ambassadors endorsed 15 countries that were hit early by the pandemic but have been able to bring the coronavirus under control. The U.S., not so much. That’s fine. Who needs a lovely beach in France or Croatia or GREECE! with the beautiful water and … oh, forget it! We’re totally bummed out. (Update: kitchen faucet fixed. Blockage in basement cleared. Drains being scoured out). And then here’s this: If you read just one story today, make it Watergate legend Carl Bernstein's deep dive for CNN: “In hundreds of highly classified phone calls with foreign heads of state, [Trump] was so consistently unprepared for discussion of serious issues, so often outplayed in his conversations with powerful leaders like [Putin] and Turkish President Recep Erdogan, and so abusive to leaders of America's principal allies, that the calls helped convince some senior US officials – including his former secretaries of state and defense, two national security advisers and his longest-serving chief of staff -- that the President himself �posed a danger to the national security of the United States, according to White House and intelligence officials intimately familiar with the contents of the conversations. … The sources said there was little evidence that the President became more skillful or competent in his telephone conversations with most heads of state over time. … Putin ‘just outplays’ him, said a high-level administration official -- comparing the Russian leader to a chess grandmaster and Trump to an occasional player of checkers. While Putin ‘destabilizes the West,’ said this source, the President of the United States ‘sits there and thinks he can build himself up enough as a businessman and tough guy that Putin will respect him.’ (At times, the Putin-Trump conversations sounded like ‘two guys in a steam bath,’ a source added.) … In separate interviews, two high-level administration officials familiar with most of the Trump-Putin calls said the President naively elevated Russia – a second-rate totalitarian state with less than 4% of the world's GDP.” To inject some humor: And �It must be time for an Oliver photo. Yesterday Oliver went to visit The Taronga Park Zoo for the very first time! He had a very exciting day. And I think today is a 3 photo day to cheer us all up. ����The view of Sydney Harbor from the Zoo, elephants, and so tired on the way home. I feel better, how about you? More Hadrian’s Wall. Today we visited Vindolanda, a Roman auxiliary fort just south of the Wall. It is noted for the Vindolanda tablets, a set of wooden leaf-tablets that were, at the time of their discovery, the oldest surviving handwritten documents in Britain. There is a museum there which displays finds from the site. The site was under Roman control from about 85CE to 370CE. ������From the top: walking into Vindolanda; the archeological site; a communal toilet; lots of shoes in the museum and lastly, an unknown woman’s tomb marker. Two days ago we walked through another part of the grounds at Aquinas College. Whenever I am stressed and I can’t get to the lake, an over abundance of green always helps. Today’s new message for all Americans: VOTE! VOTE! VOTE! (And wear your mask everywhere!) � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-07-01_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-112 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-07-01 Title A name given to the resource Day 112 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng https://digitalcollections.library.gvsu.edu/files/original/bfd5eaeb555c69059ef8d4a645b4bf01.pdf 0a9921b62d7423463ac43e22411b743c PDF Text Text Day 111 by windoworks Whenever I feel overwhelmed or sad or angry, or maybe just so dammed tired of it all, I look at photos and videos of Oliver. Oliver was born into the pandemic - he’s never known any other lifeway. For weeks he accepted living in an apartment with just his mother: no daycare, no park outings, no walks in strollers with friends. Now it has opened up a little more in New South Wales, and he is back at daycare and getting cuddles from relatives and other adults. And through it all he continued to grow and change and see Craig and I every day on FaceTime. Last night, looking at me, he laid his head on the side and smiled a faint smile. He knows I will copy him. Craig and I have known Oliver all 11 months of his life. Sometimes he makes sure we are watching him play and sometimes he ignores us - but he always knows we are there - the little people in Mummy’s phone. ��I don't see this as a wave anymore. Waves are outdated. We have peaks and valleys,” says Michael Osterholm (Director; Center for Infectious Disease, U of Minn). And here’s another new development everyone in research is talking about: At least four laboratory experiments suggest that the mutation makes the virus more infectious, although none of that work has been peer-reviewed. Another unpublished study led by scientists at Los Alamos National Laboratory asserts that patients with the G variant actually have more virus in their bodies, making them more likely to spread it to others. The mutation doesn’t appear to make people sicker, but a growing number of scientists worry that it has made the virus more contagious. So after months of assuring us that the virus was stable and not mutating, now you’re telling us you think it is and that mutation is helping it to spread faster and be more contagious? More than half a dozen epidemiologists, virologists, and psychologists contacted by National Geographic agree, and said that struggling governments can win their COVID-19 wars—and perhaps avoid further lockdowns—through more unified planning and messaging, steeped with harm reduction. They say much of America’s inabilities to waylay COVID-19 stem from humans ignoring their essential advantages over the virus: communication, cooperation, and compromise. Tomorrow it will be 16 weeks (4 months) since I began this entirely new way of life. In 8 weeks time (half the time I have spent at home) Grand Valley State University will reopen to students and faculty alike. I am not comfortable with that thought - and today I read an NPR article which confirmed my unease. When asked if he could imagine a college party where everyone is wearing masks, Jacques du Passage, a sophomore at Louisiana State University, laughs. "No. I don't think they would do that," he says. "I think [students] would just have the party and then face the repercussions." That's exactly what Apramay Mishra, student body president at the University of Kansas, is worried about when it comes to reopening campus amid the pandemic. "Right now it's kind of slipped from most people's minds," he says. Students "don't really think it's a big deal." Around the U.S., coronavirus cases are rising among young people. The spread of the virus has been connected to college-related events such as fraternity parties, drinking at off-campus bars and athletic practices. For colleges planning to bring thousands of students together in the fall, student spread is a real worry. And the stakes are high: If there are outbreaks, campuses may once again be forced to shut down, scattering students and disrupting academics and college finances all over again. �Many college students still have developing brains, so it's not that they aren't informed or that they don't understand the risks — its that they’re wired differently. They are highly sensitized to reward, especially in the context of peers. Hanging out with friends is a pretty incredible reward, given that many students have been isolated for months. All of their routines are built around social interaction. It's just a totally new set of social conditions that certainly nobody in that age has ever been subjected to. ���Two different approaches to social distancing. And then there’s this: ��I read a personal post this morning which suggested that, through all his actions since taking office, trump appears to be a perfect Manchurian Candidate under the control of Vladimir Putin. I remember that movie as very scary. There couldn’t be any truth to this, could there? From Zar in New Zealand: another bear, this time Superbear! ��Flashback: We journeyed on to Hadrian’s Wall. This wall was begun in 122CE during the reign of the Roman Emperor Hadrian. It ran from the banks of the River Tyne near the North Sea to the Solway Firth on the Irish Sea. This was the northern limit of the Roman Empire. It had a stone base and a stone wall. There were milecastles with two turrets in between. There was a fort about every five miles. It is thought the milecastles were staffed with static garrisons, whereas the forts had fighting garrisons of infantry and cavalry. In addition to the wall's defensive military role, its gates may have been custom posts. ���Here we are at Housteads Roman Fort. This fort on the Wall was built in 124CE and abandoned in 400CE. It must have been a lonely spot especially in midwinter. Most of the sentries were recruited from the local population. The Wall was built to keep out the Picts who were a confederation of Celtic speaking peoples. Picts means painted people in Latin. The Romans didn’t have the manpower to subdue them so they built the Wall to keep them out. Nowadays the Wall is overgrown and sinking into the earth. It was much higher and formidable during Roman times. More Wall adventures tomorrow. Today is the 2nd day of 16 days in a row of 90F (32C) and above. There may be more days but that’s as far as my weather app goes. In the back yard TJ is building a wooden wall and gate, and when its done, Craig will (hopefully) take out the chain metal gates. And so the summer goes - one project after another. Tomorrow the plumber comes to switch out the kitchen faucet and clean out the kitchen and the laundry drains. I shall be safely ensconced upstairs, although the company assured us that all of their plumbers wear masks. I will be glad to get a faucet that pours out water rather than the measly trickle we have at the moment. Remember: keep on smiling through. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource COVID-19 Journals Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Grand Valley State University. University Libraries Description An account of the resource This collection of journals and personal narratives was solicited from the GVSU community by archivists of the University Libraries during the events of the 2020 COVID-19 global pandemic. During this unprecedented crisis the university closed suddenly, following federal and state guidelines of social distancing to reduce the spread of the novel coronavirus. The university closed its campuses on March 12, 2020, and quickly moved students out of campus housing. Faculty swiftly transitioned to fully-online teaching for the remainder of the Winter 2020 semester, and all campus events, including commencement, were cancelled. The purpose of the COVID-19 Journaling Project was to document the individual and personal experiences of GVSU’s students, staff, faculty, and the wider community during this time of international crisis. Some project participants were university student employees who were compensated for their journaling. Other participants were granted stipends or extra credit for submitting entries to the archives. Still others participated without any compensation or credit. The University Archives remains grateful to all who submitted journals, for helping us to understand the impact of this crisis on our community. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020 Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Subject The topic of the resource Epidemics Grand Valley State University College students Personal narratives COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University. University Libraries. Special Collections & University Archives Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context COVID-19_2020-06-30_BenjaminPamela_PD-Day-111 Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Benjamin, Pamela Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-06-30 Title A name given to the resource Day 111 Description An account of the resource Daily journal entry of Pamela Benjamin, spouse of GVSU history professor, Craig Benjamin, during the COVID-19 pandemic. Originally self-published on WordPress. Subject The topic of the resource COVID-19 pandemic, 2019-2020 Epidemics Grand Valley State University Grand Rapids (Mich.) Personal narratives Source A related resource from which the described resource is derived University Archives. COVID-19 Journaling Project Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available Grand Valley State University University Libraries. Special Collections and University Archives. Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource <a href="http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/">In Copyright</a> Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource application/pdf Language A language of the resource eng